Alexis

Okay but I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS

Today’s aesthetic: photos of lurking animals that one wouldn’t reasonably expect to be capable of lurking.

Proof needed

NEED A DISPENSER HERE NEED A DISPENSER HERE NEED A DISPENSER HERE NEED A DISPENSER HERE

Building a bathroom for the shopping district in Sims.

Bitches be turning into a blushing puddle as soon as you call them any pet name. It's me I'm bitches

I liked this post, scrolled for like another minute before I went “SHIT FUCK SHIT” and scrolled back to reblog it

Twitter really is 2014 tumblr

I don't think I have ever picked up a pair of tongs without clicking them together a couple of times.

Gotta make sure they work

channel your inner crab

today Meatball abruptly realized that there are refugee office plants in the kitchen (they have been there for weeks) and has decided his singular purpose in life is to eat them 

we put up a 4 foot tall step-through baby gate when we brought the plants home, but it turns out he can actually squeeze his body through the bars. not in a dignified way, mind you. but he can 

we have foiled him with a two-gate system: a short one with small openings that he can’t squeeze through, and the tall one that he can’t jump over. he is now sitting outside our kitchen door rattling the gates with his stupid little mitten hands like an animated ghost prisoner in a Spirit Halloween decoration 

update: we underestimated him

is this the same Meatball with the Hanukkah sweater????

tiny accountant harasses human, eats plants

i mean he has to find some way to unwind from his high-pressure job 

either i’m going to save my coworkers’ houseplants OR my cat is going to be in incredible shape for his American Ninja Warrior audition

I first reblogged this in January, and here my ass is in March 2020 self-quarantined at home.

THIS POST DID NOT AGE WELL

This post was prophetic

Thanks, I hate it