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"lock in" is probably one of the most important phrases to enter the public lexicon in the 2020s

i love when my mutuals are mutuals with each other #myecosystem #myenclosure

my sister’s bf referred to eating cheese as “mousing out” and i’m so utterly charmed by that. can we all agree to adopt that into language.

chronically depressed pokemon trainer and the absol that she didn't pick but she just has because it showed up one time

she keeps it around because she recognizes it’s probably good for her long-term, and her therapist agrees, but it is very annoying to have a fluffy creature in your house that constantly inconveniences you by messing up plans you haven’t even made yet. she comes home from work and she can’t cook dinner because all the kitchen knives are gone. she wakes up in the morning and all the non-essential pills are missing from the medicine cabinet. her car’s gas is siphoned sometimes. how the fuck does a pokemon even learn to siphon a car’s gas tank? but she’s still here and she’s slowly making it day by day and things, verrrrrry slowly, are getting better

I'm gonna be honest for a second. I cant believe people still care about Taylor swift.

This is really funny on dark mode

On dark mode this is like a clown trying to hide behind a light pole.

I watched Iron Lung again tonight in the comfort of my home and my dog must've been watching with me cause as soon as bad things started happening to Simon she started crying. In the scene where he ultimately dies she could not stop crying at me. I am now watching him play the Henry Stickman collection so she can see that A.) He's not dead and B.) He's not in distress. Occasionally he'll whine or hum in discontent about something and my dog will look at me and whine to try and get me to fix whatever is distressing Markiplier.

she's the opposite of that snake that hates markiplier

it took 2.5 books and an accidentally faked death for camp half blood to rock with percy. like wow that boy was in the trenches

I know we are all like "people in caveman times would drill holes in their head to relieve headaches" andwe go oh that's so stupid that's so dumb but like. then I get a headache and I'm like.ooooh I get it I get it. Grug prepare the drill.