Hurley's House for Haunted Hounds

the funniest and most tragic moment in steven universe is the scene that implies that Pearl pulls bitches like a professional dog walker but doesn't know how phones work so her place on earth is being a life-changing futch fling for every dyke on the east coast there's probably a gay bar in maryland where they talk about the twiggy bird chick that eats milf pussy like it's the last edible thing on earth and they dont even know about the city full of thousand year old neon lesbian amazons who are pent up 24/7 from The War and leaving room for jesus cause they're always hanging out with their softboy nephew who might be the second coming of christ

In a single sentence, no less.

sometimes i have strong opinions but they're also so inane that halfway through writing a post i'll be like "yeah, this is Absolutely not worth the energy it's taking" and delete everything. but then the opinion is still in my head. and i still want to share it. so within five minutes i go "you know, i bet i can phrase it more succinctly this time" and anyway. you all see where this is going. sometimes i do this four times in a row before i give up on the specific inane opinion and instead write a vague post about the concept of opinions as if that'll satisfy the urge to post the entirety of my inner monologue online. may or may not be relevant to what you're reading right now. and now all our lives have been enriched. you're welcome

i think the angriest ive ever made someone on reddit was when they used an emoji while arguing and i said "What is this tiny yellow picture"

If I keep practicing I might even be a person soon

UTENA STOP TRYING TO BECOME A PRINCE THE LAKERS NEED A CENTER

has anyone noticed recently that it's expensive

times like these really make you appreciate pouring river water in your socks