The best things happening outside Culture...

Totally Thames This is an annual celebration of the River Thames offering a creative and diverse programme of events. There really are too many events to describe in this post. I’m most intrigued by the R.A.P Party; Inua Ellams' Rhythm And Poetry Party...’a nostalgic, no-clutter, no-fuss, night of hip-hop-inspired poems and favourite hip-hop songs.’ This all takes place on a boat. Tickets: Various Where: Various, London When: 1 – 30 September http://totallythames.org/

Hackney Record Fair Songs – we all like them. And, in Hackney they’re celebrating songs. Hackney Record Fair is another venture from the gang behind the monthly Hackney Flea Market. Here, ruminators who like their songs played the old-fashioned way have the chance to thumb through records across more than 50 stalls, AND get hold of rare vinyl. Gotta catch em all! You’ll also find an on-site bakery, record cleaning service and DJs playing all day. Tickets: £2 Where: Hackney Arts Centre , Stoke Newington When: Sunday September 2 2018

London Swedes Crayfish Festival Go cray for kräftskiva at the LondonSwedes Crayfish Festival, with mountains of the sexy red shellfish, potato salad and snaps at this traditional end-of-summer shindig. Skål! Tickets: Free - £35 Where: 25 Sheldon Square, Paddington When: Friday August 31 2018 - Saturday September 1 https://www.londonsvenskar.com/londonswedes-crayfish-parties/

Drag: Self-portraits and Body Politics ‘Drag Race’ fans, here’s a summer exhibition for you. This Hayward Gallery show is made up of self-portraits showing the many faces of drag, old and new. Don’t-miss moments include the works of Robert Mapplethorpe and Cindy Sherman plus contemporary pieces by Adam Christensen and Victoria Sin. Tickets: Free Where: Hayward Gallery , South Bank When: Until Sunday October 14 2018 http://www.southbankcentre.co.uk/

Found Footage Festival: After Dark Childhood pals Joe Pickett and Nick Prueher have delved through charity shop bargain bins and car boots for the weirdest, silliest and most outrageous VHS tapes they can get their hands on. Now, they're showing them to the world at Found Footage Festival. It's their sixth edition of the festival, and this time they’re bringing an all-new ‘After Dark’ selection of the trashiest, dirtiest and most depraved videos in their collection. PROPA NORTY!! Tickets: £14.50 - £17 Where: Soho Theatre , Soho When: Friday August 31 2018 - Saturday September 1 2018 https://sohotheatre.com/shows/found-footage-festival-after-dark/

Listen: Ariana Grande ‘Sweetener’ “5 stars. SHEER POP ECSTASY.” Not my words (yes my words), but the words of all people, everywhere. Perhaps not, but that’s what the reviews would have you believe about AG’s third album, released today. I’m not a super-fan, but it’s great to see that Ariana Grande-Butera has come a long way since her role of Cat Valentine in the Nickelodeon television series ‘Victorious’… Tickets: Free Where: Play through headphones to avoid judgement When: Friday 17 August 2018 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ffxKSjUwKdU

South West Four Armin Van Buuren, Dizzee Rascal, DJ EZ, My Nu Leng, Marshmello, Chase & Status, Craig David, Nadia Rose, Andy C, Sigma, Martin Solveig, Idris Elba…the list goes on. This music festival doesn’t compromise on quality. Short queues, clean toilets, ample supplies of antibacterial hand gel, amnesty bins. Amy L, a self-proclaimed ‘tastemaker’ wrote in her online review of last year’s event, “Good range of music…Rudimental and Andy C were both amazing! Would definitely attend again!” With such stamps of approval, you’d be bonkers not to go. Cya there, Amy L. Tickets: £57.50 (day), £99 weekend Where: Clapham Common When: Saturday August 25 2018 - Sunday August 26 2018 http://www.southwestfour.com

‘Allelujah!’ Alan Bennett is 84 years old. Do you know what else is 84 years old? 84 years ago prohibition was repealed, and citizens of the U.S were permitted to legally buy alcohol. In the same year, star spangled banner was voted on as the National Anthem. Hitler also came into power. And, 84 years ago, Alan Bennett was born. It’s amazing to see that at 84 he is still producing entertainment such as this.  As a child, I would sit with my father in his car and listen to rambling audio tapes of Alan Bennett’s books, voiced by Alan himself. I was fascinated by the way Alan would blether and blither, much as I am doing now. The History Boys and Lady in the van are two of his most popular works, and Allelujah!, a play about Britain’s culture of uncaring, looks to be as enjoyable. Tickets: £15-£65 Where: Bridge Theatre, Bermondsey When: Until Friday September 28 2018 https://bridgetheatre.co.uk/whats-on/allelujah/

Wine Car Boot A pop up independent wine market in London. You can buy bottles to take home with you, or get popping the corks right there in the market. Over 30 of London’s wine shops are involved in the glugfest, and it doesn’t matter if you don’t know anything about wine, because (arguably) no one really does. In short, there’s as much wine as you can shake a vine at, accompanied by food stalls and music. Tickets: Free Where: St James’s Market When: Saturday August 18 2018 Winecarboot.com

Lagunitas Beer Circus The Californian import is setting up shop at London’s Flat Iron Square for one raucous night only. Expect to see contortionists, burlesque dancers, bearded ladies – the whole shebang Tickets cost £15 and profits are donated to the animal charity Wild at Heart. Tickets: £15 Where: Flat Iron Square , Southwark When: Saturday 18 August 2018 https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-lagunitas-beer-circus-london-tickets-45528660449

African Fashion Week London A model…idiot? If you like fashion as much as our very own Fraser Thomson (outgoing), you’ll get yourself down to Covent Garden this weekend to enjoy the delights of AFW. No less than 50 fashion designers from 22 countries will feature at the 2018 edition of the Africa Fashion Week London. Tickets: £0-£43 Where: Freemasons' Hall, Covent Garden When: Until Saturday August 11 2018 https://www.africafashionweeklondon.com/

Artist Rooms: Jenny Holzer American artist Jenny Holzer’s work is decades’ worth of statements, aphorisms, quotes and poetry. She takes words and sentences and plasters them over the streets, prints them on cups and condoms, engraves them into marble, and sends them stuttering at lightspeed along LED columns. Tickets: Free Where: Tate Modern, South Bank When: Until Wednesday July 31 2019 https://www.tate.org.uk/

Notting Hill Carnival Pioneers Community Festival There are many ways to get ready for Carnival, and a good place to start is with a musical tribute at Emslie Horniman’s Pleasance park. This long-running community festival celebrates the residents and musical legends that shaped a 60s street party into the world famous fiesta it is today and remembers those who have departed. This year see free performances from Carnival regulars like the Portobello Live Choir, the Mangrove Steelband and reggae queen Janet Kay. Tickets: Free Where: Emslie Horniman's Pleasance , Kensal Town When: Sunday August 12 2018 https://www.rbkc.gov.uk/leisure-and-culture/parks/emslie-hornimans-pleasance

The Pie ‘n’ Mash Up: The Pie and Mash Festival If you're Hank Marvin, get yourself down to this Cockney feast serving up delicious helpings of pie and mash. The Pie and Mash Festival will bring together London's most prized purveyors of pie with all the traditional trimmings, including liquor, gravy, jellied eels, cockles and roll mops. Wash down all the pastry crust with some local craft beers and treats at the Gin Cocktail bar. There'll also be sing-a-longs around the joanna, rhyming slang battles and a Fools and Horses Pub Quiz. Who ate all the pies? Tickets: £12.50 Where: Studio 338 , Greenwich Peninsula When: Sunday August 12 2018 https://www.studio338.co.uk/

The Hackney Beer Hop with Headway East London Take a tour of Hackney's tastiest beer spots on The Hackney Beer Hop, a pub crawl organised by Five Points Brewing Company. You'll be treated to a lip-smaking brew at five different local boozers including the Five Points Brewery, The Cock Tavern, Pressure Drop x Verdant Taproom, The Chesham, Deviant & Dandy and The Pambury Tavern. Plus, the cost of your ticket will go towards Headway East London, a local charity supporting people affected by brain injury. Tickets: £10 Where: Various London locations, London When: Saturday August 11 2018

https://www.sciencemuseum.org.uk/see-and-do/wonderlab-equinor-gallery

gettyimagesgallery.com