the only one who can beat eurovision is me

I miss when the big boat was stuck

‘this meeting could have been an e-mail’ but it’s me watching long tiktoks and thinking ‘this could have been a two-sentence text post’

if someone lifts up our stone me and my buddies all crawl up to the rim and chatter excitedly while our eyes get used to the light

girl help i managed my time poorly and now im suffering the consequences

oh to be at an irish pub right now

Every reblog removes one HP from the queen

i cant wait until she actually dies and everyone freaks out saying the final reblog did the last hit

This is so fun its just like Jenga

there should be more ages where you unlock abilities. 18 vote. 21 drink in american bars. 28 you get to get to tell a cop to fuck off once a year. 40 you get to use blow darts. 55 you get a list of every celebrity who's psycho. 70 immune to poisons

I love using my phone in public surely I will not scroll past some strange image

what's the rarest pairing you've ever been into and how many works are in their ao3 tags