ShellyForShane

Shane one day gets bad press because racism and homophobia critic him for no reason despite he’s totally objective greatness, and well, the public reaction gets to him and he says a few things a little too self-humbling and Ilya Hollander Rozanov activates like a sleeper agent and next thing you know Shane is tucked on the passenger seat while Ilya is focused on the road with the single purpose of going to the cottage and dragging his husband to the trophy room. A man on a mission.

I think at some point Ilya’s therapist gets concerned by what seems to be a codependent and anxious attachment btw Ilya and Shane. When Shane the Doer hears about it, For the sake of his husband’s mental health’s improvement and the preservation of a healthy marriage, he convinces Ilya to try installing boundaries and do activities separately. It lasts a week before Ilya comes home sobbing from a video game session with Troy communicating that if they keep this boundary thing up he’ll need to switch his meds’ dosage because he’s miserable. Shane jumps from the couch he’s been sitting on for 40minutes because he was supposed to eat diner with rose but he kept wanting to make jokes and look at ilya to see him laugh but he wasn’t there and it SUCKED OMG and Shane starts sobbing too because if they keep this up he will have to get on his own meds and let’s never do this again I hate it when I can’t smell you near me

I think Shane and Ilya are the type of couple that gives you whiplash. They’re touchy feely lovey dovey staring into each other’s eyes with their ring finger hooked because they’re married and so enamoured with each other’s one second and the next Shane is wrestling Ilya to ground while Ilya is trying to bite him and kicking him in the ribs for freedom. And you can’t separate them because they’ll be very upset.

I think part of the reason I am obsessed with the show is that they’re animalistic in their need for each other. Like it’s not a fuck scene edit were you see a finger carefully tracing the curve of the sacred human body or the rhythm on tempo of in and out with an awkward face with flawless makeup and zero strain on it. In the show the sex is fast paced, bold, sweaty, messy, a little uncoordinated and you feel like a voyeur looking at it but you don’t even question the fact those two people want each other bad

MyShane and screen Shane both share Hudson features yes but MyShane is covered in freckles. Dots from head to toes. Like it’s very important to me.

I know every time there is a spike in Shane Hollander THIRST on line you’ll find Ilya Hollander Rozanov fighting for his life on socials