"FUCK YEAH Princess Diaries!"

I feel like Squidward is the type of gay man who sexually imprinted on an unrequited crush in his teens and has been chasing it's shadow ever since. Sexually speaking I think it would be difficult for him to be present. It's not that he has trouble being vulnerable, I think he's a vulnerable if tense lover. Like whenever he sleeps with somebody new he can only see them when measured against an ideal he won't allow himself to fully comprehend. Because if he ever looks at it head on, he knows it will never happen perfectly. Like, he has a hard time indulging in his partners fantasies, especially when it clashes with the semiconscious image in his head. So the sex is pleasant but tense and distant.

We used to have a society.

so far one theme of the 30s for me has been realizing that literally every human being on earth who appears completely cool and collected and together with it at first glance has some threshold past which enough known information about them will shatter that mystique completely. i don't even say this negatively or pessimistically it's just been helpful to keep in mind that we're all like that.

she went after my cock like she was smeego. and I was that gay little ring.

some of yall didnt go insane at 15 and it shows

It’s not senseless violence to me, not if it’s you

You're stranded on a deserted island with the person on your lockscreen. How screwed are you?

Literally almost every millennial I know has a memory of accidentally walking in on their parents or hearing their parents having sex. It's fucking normal. Human beings have sex. Your parents fuck. Get over it. Being weird about it isn't healthy.