What in tarnation is going on here?

-@osha-certified-forklifter

Q:What is crab day?

A: well, a celebration of how strangely cursed our little corner of the internet can be. It's also a community lead funding. Push. Tumblr costs money to run, if we want to keep our little corner of the internet it's weird unique self, we're going to have to foot part of the bill.

Q: when is crab day?

A: July 29th. I would have preferred a slightly longer lead time to get the word out better, But we work with what we can get and July 29th has already gotten some traction in other groups.

Q: how do I participate?

A: buy a mutual crabs, or if you're broke, crab post crab memes.

Q: why crabs?

Thank you @j-likes-tumbl-r and everyone who got me to 1000 reblogs!

reality itself is going to fucking collapse someone please help

I was literally being torn to shreds by a fucking interdimensional rift on spacetime

ALWAYS CHOOSE YOUR RENT.

Food pantries are a punch in the nuts to your pride but they require WAY less hoops to jump through to get than the financial side of housing assistance. Also, there is often going to be MORE RESOURCES AVAILABLE for you when it comes to food assistance of MULTIPLE TYPES (food stamps/ebt, places that double said EBT, food pantries, places that just give away free food like soup kitchens, places that give away their leftovers from the day before etc) rather than housing assistance which are neither numerous nor are people likely to apply for.

I personally have used food pantries. I may have to use them again. They are there to help you for that reason, okay? Please fucking choose to pay your rent until we can abolish landlords and live on mutual aid.

Stay housed. Do you hear me, if this choice happens, seek mutual aid or charity for food and STAY HOUSED. Statistically, it is better to take the hit to your pride, go ask for food assistance, and sleep in your bed and eat that food in your home because coming back from losing said home is going to be so much harder that recovering from food insecurity is.

“Telling people not to do their own electrical work because it’s dangerous is classist bc not everyone can afford an electrician” “I can’t believe that plumber charged me so much money for less than an hour of work, what a scam!” “In the post-capitalist utopia everyone will just take turns doing all types of blue-collar work, instead of years-long apprenticeships we’ll just give them a course in high school or something” “Building and safety codes are just pointless bureaucracy meant to stop the average citizen from being able to build their own structures” “I would love to be a farmer and just hang out tending to plants all day”

Watch "Dropkick Murphys - Worker's Song" on YouTube

Name, or preferred form of address: Gender (if applicable): Race/Species: Position: Is this your original timeline/universe? Y/N If N, then how did you arrive in this universe?

What is your powerset, if you have one:

How do these powers help you uphold the standards of the Occupational Safety and Health Administration?

How long have you been employed at OSHA?

If you’re not employed, then what are you doing here?

How do you uphold OSHA standards in general?

Wait you’re dragging me into this Well we share the body i can’t exactly not do it. well just keep this list applying to only yourself alright Of course.

Presenting female i’m an angel what did you expect.

Angel as stated.

N/A.

Uh possibly, working with Nick the whole original universe and timeline thing can get a bit complicated.

Portals possibly.

Healing, flight, blessings and force field creation.

Force fields can be used as temporary structural supports, healing in case of osha violations and flight to get to places more easily.

N/A

Someone handed me a vest so i’m here now i guess.

Name, or preferred form of address: Gender (if applicable): Race/Species: Position: Is this your original timeline/universe? Y/N If N, then how did you arrive in this universe?

What is your powerset, if you have one:

How do these powers help you uphold the standards of the Occupational Safety and Health Administration?

How long have you been employed at OSHA?

If you’re not employed, then what are you doing here?

How do you uphold OSHA standards in general?

Wait you’re dragging me into this Well we share the body i can’t exactly not do it. well just keep this list applying to only yourself alright Of course.

Presenting female i’m an angel what did you expect.

Angel as stated.

N/A.

Uh possibly, working with Nick the whole original universe and timeline thing can get a bit complicated.

Portals possibly.

Healing, flight, blessings and force field creation.

Force fields can be used as temporary structural supports, healing in case of osha violations and flight to get to places more easily.

N/A

Someone handed me a vest so i’m here now i guess.

Name, or preferred form of address: Gender (if applicable): Race/Species: Position: Is this your original timeline/universe? Y/N If N, then how did you arrive in this universe?

What is your powerset, if you have one:

How do these powers help you uphold the standards of the Occupational Safety and Health Administration?

How long have you been employed at OSHA?

If you’re not employed, then what are you doing here?

How do you uphold OSHA standards in general?

Gender: Broom/mop

Race/species: Munditia Arboretum, maple variant

Position: - floor sweeper, I think - the third broom closet on Corridor 7, Site 19, as of two hours and 23 minutes ago

Timeline/universe: unclear. Tends to travel frequently. If not, likely brought in by a forgetful employee. Or abandoned, but that’s neither here nor there.

Powerset: The janitor holding the broom is in control. Eternal dedication to the art of cleaning. Can clean floors, ceilings, and everything in between. Anti-bacterial. Inspires others to take up the broom. Will return to the hand of whomever held it. Made of wood and various fibres.

Name, or preferred form of address: Gender (if applicable): Race/Species: Position: Is this your original timeline/universe? Y/N If N, then how did you arrive in this universe?

What is your powerset, if you have one:

How do these powers help you uphold the standards of the Occupational Safety and Health Administration?

How long have you been employed at OSHA?

If you’re not employed, then what are you doing here?

How do you uphold OSHA standards in general?

2. Female

3. Squirrel-dragon hybrid but technically I’m a shapeshifter so I can look human

4. Cleric-on-call; medical consultant

5. Y

6. Shapeshifting; firebreathing; portal creation; healing; pure awesomeness

7. I heal people and tell them to stop being stupid. I also create portals which allow for safe access for OSHA employees to inspect locations.

8. 30 minutes

9. I’m not sure I was “hired,” per se… But I work here now.

10. I resist the urge to set people on fire