posts aplenty

There is a reality not so far from our own in which Ratitouille (2007) was filmed as an avant-garde conceptual horror akin to Eraserhead (1977)

There is a reality not so far from our own in which that's how they spell it

no more historic events this decade that is ENOUGH, i’m putting my foot down

History is not done with us yet my friend

I have received all manner of threat, up to and beyond “I will play a flute carved from your femur,” and yet this is the first time I’ve felt truly threatened

i knew posting this in 2022 was risky but holy fucking shit

do you ever say something and then think "wow this isnt even a bit. im just like this"

i feel dirty after reading that

do yoo need a scwubby wubby? OwO

i think i do need a scwubby wubby to be honest but not from you

When is it my turn to be happy.

cell phone doesn't like water because it is a combination of the other three elements. it is a rock (earth) that we fill with lightning (fire) that can control radio waves (air). if it contained water too, it would be too perfect; it would be like a god. to prevent this, the universe kills the would be uniter-of-the-elements. it's basic science.

Hey op google what LCD stands for

i took an oath in third grade to never do drugs

1-800-ARE-YOU-SLAPPIN

i can’t get over the fact that if you were to have more than two arms you’d need more than two pectoral muscles to accommodate them

* OH SHIT

i am. very normal. yes. very. definitely not gripping my arm so hard it’s about to draw blood

Every pride, you must reblog this. No exceptions

I love that four different people on my feed scheduled this joyous person to reblog by 8am on June 1. I look forward to seeing this a dozen more times today.

i appear to have made mortal nemeses with a pigeon

tumblr stop rooting for the pigeon

Out of Touch Thursday

OUT OF TOUCH THURSDAY

but im out of my head when you’re not around…

this is the only out of touch thursday you can reblog this

I scheduled this on 7/3/2020. Hope I got the day right…

Behold! The printing titty!

I normally tag these posts “specific ass machines” after a minor meme that blew through Tumblr, but I was tempted to tag this one “specific boob machines”.

disappearing into the bathroom at the club only to reappear covered in decorative printing patterns followed by a 10ft lady wearing bowls as a bra