This blog is intended as a safe space for all ocd discussion, as somebody who has been diagnosed my whole life and had extremely violent OCD since I was a child.
For those with OCD, I hope this blog can be a place to safely share your
vents/intrusive thoughts
confessions/takes
positive and negative experiences
experiences
and simply share a space with those who can hear you.
For those without OCD or those uninformed, I will gladly also answer asks about
medical questions
experience questions
confessions/takes
examples of asks:
"Hi, I had (this experience with ocd) today. I dont want advice, I just wanna share. -anon."
"Hi, im an author, how do i write ocd compulsions respectfully?"
"Hi, I have (type)ocd, can others with (type)ocd tell me if they relate to (thing)?"
but please note, i do not speak for everyone. I suggest if you want info, you turn on the notifs for the post with your ask and allow others to insight you as well.
My name is Wright, I've had extreme OCD my whole life, and it has disabled me in every function of the word. As a child, I would have panic attacks and meltdowns over other kids "putting their pencils on the desk wrong", I had violent intrusive thoughts about things I didn't want, I convinced myself I was diseased, was extremely paranoid, and worst of all did not understand what was happening.
I was removed from the public school system when I was a child because I was "unstable" and depressed in elementary, which led to me being isolated and violently abused with no support. My abuse made my OCD worse, giving me constant and hard to logic episodes about my own morality. My anxiety and panic over things being out of order became full shutdowns or moral episodes over walking through doors with the "wrong foot", not touching the counter exactly four times, or biting my food unevenly.
I skipped middle school, then half of high school. I went for one year and was so unable to function I left again, was held back multiple grades, and still am.
OCD has ruined many aspects of my life and I am not shy to say it disables me, but it also doesn't ruin me. It is shockingly little of my personality, in fact.
I am a writer, I draw occasionally, my special interest is a rock band from the 2000s, and I am extremely knowledgeable in snakes. I like the color orange, Marvel, lukewarm weather, reptiles, cold war legalities, and blueberry espresso.
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hiyaaa! I think I might have OCD, but I’m far FAR too scared to talk to anyone about it or get tested, what if suddenly every experience I’ve had gets invalidated?? What If I accidentally made everything up??? I know I haven’t!!! I am actually 100% without a doubt I haven’t!! But what if other people think I’m faking???? What if I’m actually normal and stupid for wanting to know what’s wrong with me??? Siiiiiiigh I don’t know I’m putting this here 😞 just wanted to speak !!!
Rumination is probably the most common type of OCD compulsion, but I rarely see anyone talking about it. I've talked to multiple people diagnosed with OCD who didn't even recognize it as a compulsion.
Basically, if you have OCD you have terrible intrusive thoughts. They can be about anything, but common themes are fear of being a bad person, fear of hurting someone, fear of contamination. etc.
Rumination is when you get stuck in a spiral. Rumination is when you spend hours catastrophizing, overthinking, analyzing, telling yourself it's going to be okay.
I'll say it again:
Rumination is a compulsion.
Rumination is a compulsion, and that means you have to stop doing it.
I did ERP (exposure response prevention) for my OCD with a therapist! For 9 months! And it did help, but the idea didn't really click until I found this website a couple years later.
And Oh My God. It made things make so much more sense, and I was able to pull myself out of an episode even though I wasn't in therapy or on meds at the time.
Genuinely if you have OCD, or even if you suspect you have OCD, I'm begging you to read some of these articles.
Like this was genuinely life changing for me.
Here are some of the ones that were most helpful to me:
