my fingers feel like wood.

prior to the apocalypse, glenn rhee had his few family members: his mother and his sisters, all of whom he had loved with all of his heart. like so many others, he had not been able to get in touch with them when the world collapsed. he had no idea of their fates, and that was heart-wrenching in and of itself. however, he'd found a family, too. maggie, of course, was the love of his life, but he'd loved their found friends, too. daryl had become one of the most important people to him. daryl had shown tremendous growth, too, going from racist comments to demonstrating unconditional care for glenn as time moved forward. if glenn wished that one thing could be different, he would encourage daryl not to blame himself for glenn's death. their situation had been perilous, and glenn harbored no ill will whatsoever. when glenn saw the other man again, he almost could not believe his eyes, and yet, what he was seeing--- or whom--- was undeniable. "daryl? is that you?" glenn could feel the smile spreading across his face right away. "oh my god, i can't believe this... it's really you!" he declared.

it was hard not to labor with regrets, especially with all that she had endured. lori wished that she could reverse certain decisions. she wished that she could have given rick some sense of peace towards the end. however, the story was told, and there was no unwriting it. lori could only hope that the people whom she'd come to love were all right. there were so many differences between them, and yet, they'd become a dysfunctional family. lori almost could not believe it when she saw him: and, of course, he had rejected many of people's so-called day-to-day necessities. lori's smile appeared and wobbled, her eyes filling with tears as she looked at him in the distance. "daryl?" she called out, and yet, it was not a true question. she would know the man anywhere. "it's me. it's lori," she said, even if that was evident, too. "are you all right? i can't believe that you're here. is anyone else... here?" she had no idea. however, she wanted to savor this moment, having found a friend.

lori was getting used to the fact that there was structure again, and she was trying to relearn what it meant to be a person in a more civilized set of systems. here, there were hospitals and prisons, police stations, and schools. hell, there was a functioning government again! lori had not lived long enough to see some of the things that rick and the surviving members of their group did. she had not seen cannibalism. she had not seen their found family members killed in such atrocious ways: hershel with a machete; beth with a bullet to the brain; t-dog torn apart by walkers; andrea bitten. the list could go on and on, and that was the terror of things. however, she had to force herself to believe that if she could come back and work on finding happiness, then they could, too. perhaps rick had found happiness, too. lori did not know about michonne, but... she would accept things once she came to know them. michonne was a better match for rick. "excuse me? can i pick your brain for a second?" lori inquired when someone was willing to chat with her. "... i come from a much different place, a much different world. did this place ever have..." lori shook her head. "... the undead?"

what can we do? get a divorce? lori sometimes replayed one of her final conversations with rick. it reverberated throughout her brain: a reminder of how contentious things had become between them before her end. lori knew that she had always loved rick: and as soon as she learned that he was alive, she'd stopped things with shane. said things never should have happened, she knew, and yet... it would be unfair to demonize her. it was the end of the world and she thought her husband was dead. she needed comfort, to feel something, and shane had rooted her to the universe again. not knowing what happened to carl, to her and rick's baby, tore her up inside, and yet, she'd been given a chance to hit the reset button. who was afforded such an opportunity? lori was walking along, still not accustomed to not having her rounded belly just yet. "excuse me?" she called out, swallowing hard when a person stopped in their tracks. "can you point me in the direction of the local hospital? i have somethin' that needs lookin' at," lori expressed.

there was a lot that chuck mcgill did not feel prepared to face. he knew that some people would mourn the loss of him: rebecca and howard, without a doubt, but... jimmy, too. in his own way, his younger brother would mourn him. chuck did not know how he wanted jimmy to feel. jimmy had done as much as he could to discredit chuck: to make it nearly impossible for him to bounce back. to find his footing. to find his way again. chuck would do some things over: he would have apologized to howard for leaving in the way that he did. he would have told rebecca just how much he'd always loved her, even factoring in his mistakes. he'd still loved his ex-wife, and he knew that she knew it, too. chuck was seated on a park bench, looking out into the world: trying to continue to heal and to cope with his psychological malady related to electromagnetism. chuck winced, touching the bandage above his eyebrow, when he noticed someone who was also... noticing. "i'm... i'm all right," he delivered with a meek smile, but at least it was there. "well, i'm not. but i could be a heck of a lot worse too." glass half-full, right?

all that she'd wanted to do was to protect people as best as she could. in the end, she'd made the wrong choice. she should have heeded carol's recommendation. she should have put philip down, but she had not wanted to do so, in the end. she'd been living in a fantasy land. she was a smart person, and yet, she'd chosen actions which did not confirm that fact. andrea was shocked to draw breath again. however, perhaps this was her opportunity to start over. to live in a world that was less horrible and to practice as the lawyer she'd been for many years prior to the world collapsing. it crossed the woman's mind that, well, maybe... maybe her sister would return to life as well. it was a comforting thought: that of imagining amy here, too. but that could be a pipe dream, and one that she did not want to become hooked on. "excuse me?" andrea greeted, trying not to look as alarmed and out of place as she felt. "can you point me in the direction of the local police station?" that still felt odd, too: that certain structures were functional.

she was doing that which was quite unusual for her: instead of wearing a gown and walking a long hall, the silver-haired woman had her knees in the mud, looking after a squealing pig who managed to escape the arms of her embrace. for the first time in a long while, a real and genuine laugh escaped the woman's lips as she looked after her animals. she'd done what she set out to do: she'd established a sanctuary for a variety of animal species and breeds. helaena chuckled when she noticed the mud which now covered her overalls. "what a mess!" helaena called out when a volunteer came to see her now. she did not sound annoyed, though. in fact, she sounded rather chaffed. "i cannot thank you enough for your volunteerism," the former queen announced once she settled on a more serious conversation. "how are you enjoying your role thus far? you are having such a wonderful effect on our animals here." helaena only had good things to say about them.

there was so much to heal from, it was almost difficult to know where to start. helaena regretted any pain that she might have brought to her mother. however, she made the decision that she did, and there was no taking that back now. she could not reverse her decisions themselves, nor the ripple effects which they caused. in this new place, though? she had a chance to be what she hoped to be a normal person. helaena doubted that she would ever actually be normal: she had been a queen, after all. however, that did not mean that she could not try. perhaps she could do what she said that she wanted to do: perhaps she could raise animals. running a sanctuary would be fulfilling, she knew. she much preferred such a life compared to one of deadly politics. helaena was out alone at night, which likely was not a smart decision. she was ambling about, a torch of fire behind her on a wall. "good evening," she greeted to the stranger who had spotted her, hoping that she was not a target now. "have you endured difficulties sleeping as well?" she asked.

ted beneke expected that he should not have been such a fool back in new mexico. he'd been gullible, and he'd believed what he wanted to believe. he lived in a world of delusion that was, to some extent, of his own doing. he wanted to live in a fantasy land in which he did not commit the crime that he did: that he did not siphon money from his company. that he had good reasons, even if he had actually been motivated out of his own selfishness. ted's girls did not deserve to know that their father was so single-minded, even if he had claimed to be acting out of their interest, too. ted heaved a sigh at his new job, not noticing that one of his colleagues caught a glimpse of his self-judging moment. "oh, hey there," he greeted, clearing his throat as he tried for a smile: he was successful, but the look was meek, too. "... i'm dying for a lunch break, but then again... i have not been all that productive today," the man found himself admitting, as much as it pained him to do so.

all that edwin jenner hoped was that his wife would have been proud of him. he'd held out for as long as he could: he tried to continue with his work and to do some good, even prior to the arrival of rick's group. in the end, there was nothing that he could do. he could not stop the advancement of the virus. not to mention, he knew, at least conceptually, the life that awaited him outside of the walls of the CDC. edwin wanted no part of that life. he preferred to opt out, and he did: holding the hands of a woman whom he did not know, and yet, they shared human intimacy in their final moments. there was something beautiful about those final moments between him and jacqui. "did you reunite with loved ones here?" the doctor found himself asking, looking at the person intently as they interacted. "my wife..." edwin continued. "i lost her where i am from. but i heard that people can come back here. as themselves." in other words, not as the walkers from back home.

axelle was learning who she could be once she was removed from such a restrictive and abusive environment. some might conceptualize her as a monster, and she could not blame them for that: it was because of her that many people were targeted and died. however, she had her own circumstances which few others knew about. she was a beautiful woman, and her life had been threatened, too: either she participated in the violence, or she would lose her life herself. in the end, of course, she had underestimated a target, and beth was the one who made sure that axelle died, after all. axelle did not know who she could be in a new world. was she capable of peace? could she be prosocial towards others? maybe, and then again, maybe not. "i love your picture there," the young woman complimented, hovering a bit and having a look at the drawing that the person was completing in their notebook. "are you an artist? i do some drawing, too," axelle elected to share with them.

chuck mcgill knew that he should feel grateful for another shot at life, but he did not know if he did. jimmy had ruined many lives, including his own. chuck regretted the ripple of what occurred after he took his own life, especially when he thought about how howard and rebecca would be affected. however, he could not tolerate another second of that world: unable to stop his brother from harming people. in the end, you will hurt everyone around you, chuck remembered telling jimmy. he would have respected the other man more if he had simply admitted to his shortcomings and to the badness that he put out into the world. chuck was far from perfect himself: he was elitist and exclusionary and arrogant. however, he did not consider himself a monster. he did not cut corners or break the law in order to further serve himself. "i heard that there are support groups at the local hospital," chuck mentioned to someone whom he was chatting with now. he swallowed before looking at his feet for a second, still somewhat ashamed of the help that he needed. "some are even related to mental health, are they not?" he said.

what i did, i did for the good of the realm. varys could still hear his own words ringing in his ears. he'd made mistakes, and by the gods, there were so many of those. however, he'd been motivated out of goodness and out of helping people. it was as he'd told daenerys targaryen: his allegiances belonged to the people, and not to any one ruler. as long as i have my eyes, i will use them, he had said as well. now, varys was in not only a new place, but a new time period as well. the modernity of things was overwhelming, but he knew that he had to adapt. if he did not adapt, there was no way that he would survive things. "excuse me?" the man called out, for once, not adorned in the old-fashioned robes which used to be the only staple of his wardrobe. today, he was wearing a pair of jeans and a plain white teeshirt. "these vehicles... i know that they are called 'cars,'" the man persisted, knowing that he sounded odd right now. "where might i acquire one?" he knew little of specific shops.

willow thought that sergeant howie was a bit of a fool. not to mention, the law enforcement officer judged the customs of her island the second that his feet hit the dirt. he assumed that her people were guilty based on his own biases. willow knew that howie had desired her, even if he would not admit to that reality aloud. who was not attracted to her, anyways? willow was a beautiful woman and well-connected to her own desires and impulses. howie did not know what it was like to not be repressed, suppressed, both. willow was in her front yard, humming a tune beneath her breath as she worked on her garden. "i have a lovely batch of yellow roses this season," the young woman revealed when a person seemed to stop in their tracks to see what she was up to. "do you like roses as well? i would have no qualms picking some for you." it was a generous offer, but then again, willow macgregor was generous.

jenny's heels were caked with mud as she approached the lake in a wooded area of a forest. she liked to retire to such a place when she could: there was comfort around nature, and she certainly experienced it. without hesitation, the redheaded woman dipped her toes into the water and made her way deeper. jenny lowered her head into the still water, not arising until her waves of hair were soaked. she thought about her sweet prince duncan during moments like these. he rarely had a chance to simply be a human being in those days, ever expected to put the realm before himself. but every person had their own wishes and impulses, no matter how buried they might try to make them. jenny wore a wide smile when she noticed someone approach the edge of the lake. "are you joining me this morning?" jenny called out, not minding at all whether she did or did not know the person. "the temperature is quite comfortable. then again, i do not mind cold water either," she said.

jack missed his parents, as flawed as they could be. he knew that when he died, they mourned for him. they might not have approved of his sexual orientation, but he had still been their boy. he still did not deserve to die in the way that he did, although he felt certain that lureen and her family had come up with a story. he was almost not mad at them for that either. it had been a different time, and while that was no excuse, he could still move himself to understand. jack was out on his front yard, not quite used to not having the ample acres that he used to possess back home. he was working on his tractor, making some adjustments to ensure that things ran smoothly. "you stoppin' to take a look?" jack voiced when he noticed a straggler. his tone was kind, though, and not in any way negative. "i don't mind. you got somethin' similar?" jack asked, referring to the tractor that he was working on.

gwi-nam had never strove for goodness. it was not something that made sense to him. in fact, he rather pitied those who set out to do good in the world. the world that his country had transformed into was one that he belonged in: with violence abound and with abilities which few others came to possess. of course, he had underestimated nam-ra and eun-ji, but in the end, he believed that he would emerge once more. had lee cheong-san killed him? killed them both? in addition to gouging out his eye? gwi-nam did not have the answers to that inquiry. but in this new city? he rather missed the chaos, the zombies, the bloodshed. "could you keep it down?" gwi-nam piped up, his tone rude, as he tried not to cover his ears. he did not want to appear weak, as he was now incredibly sensitive to sounds because of what he came to transform into. a half-person, half-zombie. "... you are being way too loud. has anyone ever told you that before?" the young man pestered.