Close Your Eyes and Open Your Mind

Me: I'm sorry wha-what? Repeat that please

NT: -paint

Me: *confused* What about paint?

NT: To paint. PAINT!

Me: *still confused* Yeah, I heard that but what was the first part? I didn't hear that

NT: To paint

Me: *getting annoyed* You WANT to paint? You DON'T want to paint? You want ME to paint? Or you want to paint something TOGETHER? What is the first part???

NT: To paint

Me: *thinking I didn't sign up for this shit* Why do you keep saying it the same way ?? I'm clearly not hearing it when you say it like that ! Please can you annunciate the 1st part ????

NT: Ughh forget it. I just wanted to paint

The biggest difference between autism and ADHD is that autism is associated with social difficulties and sensory issues and ADHD is associated with attention, organization, hyperactivity-impulsivity, and memory issues.

AUTISM

Difficulty with sarcasm & jokes

Difficulty understanding or processing nonverbal communication

Difficulty forming and keeping relationships

Hyper or hypo sensitivity to any of the five senses

Need for structure/stability

Rigid, fixed interests (SpIns)

Difficulty with eye contact (ranges from uncomfortable with eye contact to prolonged staring)

Difficulty sustaining small talk or casual conversation

ADHD

Difficulty sustaining attention

Gets sidetracked easily

Trouble with organization

Loses things easily

Easily distracted

Forgetful

Object impermanence

Fidgeting

Unable to play or take part in casual activities quietly

Completes others' sentences or tends to interrupt other people

Trouble waiting their turn

Often interrupts or intrudes on others (can be with games or conversations)

May take over what other people are doing

May take or use other people's things without asking

Unable to or is uncomfortable sitting still for extended periods of time

Restless or hard to keep up with

BOTH AUTISM & ADHD

Executive dysfunction

Not thinking about others before speaking or doing something (not out of malice)

14% of people with ADHD are also autistic (cdc.gov/ncbddd/adhd/data.html)

If you experience autistic traits and have ADHD, please look into autism.

Don't spread misinformation about autistic and ADHD traits.

Healthy Fives demonstrate true neutrality, possess deep knowledge in several areas of their life, and are eager to share their findings with others. They see themselves as part of things rather than separate from everything, and balance their participation with their observation.

Five Traits

Fives take care of themselves, and believe others should do the same

Fives believe knowledge is essential for survival

Fives can be sarcastic and cynical, but don’t always share it

Fives often feel awkward around other people

Fives are suspicious when others ask personal information

Fives do not like others prying into their feelings

Fives need time to process their emotions

Fives would rather observe than participate

Fives hold onto what they have and find others wasteful

Fives guard their time and energy

Fives prefer small gatherings to larger ones (introverted)

Fives fear they do not have sufficient inner resources to function

Fives often felt invisible as a child, and choose to be invisible as an adult

Fives hate being uninformed

Fives find no happiness in material possessions

Fives do not often easily share of themselves with others

Enneagram Wings

5w4: are more creative, sensitive, empathetic, and self-absorbed, eccentric, uncertain of their feelings, and melancholic. 4 makes them more tender with themselves and less emotionally guarded with others.

5w6: are more fearful, anxious, skeptical, and distrusting, but also more social and loyal. They live more in their minds and question authority and the status quo, while also seeking to form alliances with others. Often socially awkward but enjoy forming friendships.

Under stress: Fives act like unhealthy Sevens, where they horde and cling more closely to things, which makes their world feel like it is shrinking. When this happens, they focus on their need for comfort, safety, and independence and ignore others. They become frivolous, disorganized, and distracted, unable to complete tasks, and do not think through the consequences of their behavior. They can be rude, dismissive, and condescending.

When feeling secure: Fives move to the positive side of Eight, and become more spontaneous, outspoken, and physically present, able to want to experience life in all its abundance and courageous enough to do it.

Advice for the 5: do not disconnect from your feelings. Practice building emotional connections to others, and sharing of yourself with your loved ones. Try to experience feelings in the moment, not postpone them for “later.” You can afford to give away your knowledge, your experiences, and your wisdom to others; doing so, will not make you weaker, but form stronger relationships. Believe there’s enough to go around. It’s okay to need someone, or have them need you. Letting someone else serve you can be blessing to them and to you. Start trusting others with your shared experiences. Allow yourself an occasional new luxury. Find an activity that will connect you to your body. Even if you are unsure, step into a conversation rather than falling silent.

Influences on MBTI Types:

ISTJ: stockpiles enormous amounts of information on various subjects, to feel secure in an uncertain world with unpredictable futures (inferior Ne); secretive and often disconnected from their feelings, more than is usual in an ISTJ; resentful when others prove incompetent or ‘needy’; often detached in their romantic relationships, and ‘secretive’ about the past.

ESTJ: confident in utilizing resources and in the workplace, but less social than other ESTJs and more cautious in approaching new projects that involve much risk; deeply analytical and tactical in their approach, with a mentality of “saving” rather than spending; may push aside intense feelings and inferior Fi refuse to deal with them, leading to relationship problems; may put too much pressure on their children to be self-reliant and frustrated if they are not.

ISFJ: stockpiles enormous amounts of information on various subjects, to feel secure in an uncertain world with unpredictable futures (inferior Ne); strong Ti development / reliance, so a much more detached Fe user, who does not like to talk about their feelings and may never truly deal with them; careful what information they share with who, and not actively social.

ESFJ: a more ‘detached’ Fe-dom, sometimes reliant on inferior Ti, more secretive and distrustful than other ESFJs; careful what information they share with who, and drained in social situations; often takes an interest in a wide variety of topics, for their own sake and to prepare for possible future problems (tert-Ne). May desperately want deep emotional connections but not know how to forge them.

INTJ: always looking into the future for potential issues and trying to correct them in the present through stockpiling factual knowledge and useful skills; somewhat fearful of too much engagement with the outside world due to inferior Se issues; sometimes deals with numb emotions and/or delayed emotional reactions; selective in their relationships, and not forthcoming in their personal experiences.

ENTJ: confident in utilizing resources and in the workplace, but less social than other ENTJs and without the ‘expensive’ streak often present in tert-Se users (forgoes symbols of power or influence, possibly fearful it may draw undo negative attention); deeply analytical and tactical in their approach; may push aside intense feelings and inferior Fi refuse to deal with them, leading to relationship problems; may put too much pressure on their children to be self-reliant and frustrated if they are not.

INFJ: always looking into the future for potential issues and trying to correct them in the present through stockpiling factual knowledge and useful skills; somewhat fearful of too much engagement with the outside world due to inferior Se issues; strong Ti development / reliance, so a much more detached Fe user, who does not like to talk about their feelings and may never truly deal with them; distrustful of what others may do “in the future” with shared information, and not actively social.

ENFJ: a more ‘detached’ Fe-dom, sometimes reliant on inferior Ti, more secretive and distrustful than other ENFJs, often paranoid due to high Ni issues combined with low Ti tendencies to find evidence to support rather than disassemble high Ni ‘inventions of reality’; forgoes symbols of power or influence, possibly fearful it may draw undo negative attention, and may scorn others who place emphasis on luxuries or appearances.

ESTP: stronger access to aux-Ti analytical abilities, without the usual emphasis on ‘living high and loose’; more introverted / easily drained, less inclined to take charge; may loop into Fe, and not know how to handle it, but fail to entirely subdue their emotions and wind up frustrated; more fearful of the ‘potential’ outcome of their decisions (inferior Ni).

ISTP: strong desire for independence and isolation, pushes away from others and may forgo human relationships on a deeper level, out of 5 and inferior Fe discomfort with intense emotions in oneself and others; has less emotional outbursts than other Enneagram ISTPs, and more trouble understanding what motivates their feelings; much less ‘hands on’ in trying new things.

ESFP: hyper aware of the environment and eager to learn useful skills, but deeply secretive about their intense internal emotions, and will take longer to process them away from others; may deliberately delay dealing with them by looping into Te, which they build up so as to feel competent and safe in the external world; more fearful of the ‘potential’ outcome of their decisions (inferior Ni).

ISFP: super secretive loners who are more analytical, less emotional, more detached, and more interested in impersonal knowledge, which will help them feel safe in the external world; determined to be self reliant, awkward with emotions, and sometimes ‘blocked’ from the true intensity of their feelings. Strong desire to ‘predict’ what is coming and prepare for it (Se/Ni development).

ENTP: a more focused, less distracted ENTP, who knows a hundred facts about a thousand different things, but finds it hard to retain details, which makes them less secure in dealing with the external sensory world; more introverted / easily drained, less inclined to take charge; may loop into Fe, and not know how to handle it, but fail to entirely subdue their emotions and wind up frustrated. May mistype as an INTP.

INTP: strong desire for independence and isolation, pushes away from others and may forgo human relationships on a deeper level, out of 5 and inferior Fe discomfort with intense emotions in oneself and others; often takes an avid interest in and tries to perfect useful knowledge in many different areas, seeks security in routine and prone to severe hording / holding onto things long past their ‘expiration’ date.

ENFP: insecure about the impractical nature of their Ne-dom status, and will work hard to compensate for it through practical knowledge; fearful the future may find them ‘unprepared’; suspicious of others, deeply secretive about their intense internal emotions, and will take longer to process them away from others; may deliberately delay dealing with them by looping into Te, which they build up so as to feel competent and safe in the external world.

INFP: super secretive loners who are more analytical, less emotional, more detached, and more interested in impersonal knowledge, which will help them feel safe in the external world; determined to be self reliant, awkward with emotions, and sometimes ‘blocked’ from the true intensity of their feelings; feels ‘detached from the world’ and takes an interest in many different things, to compensate for it (Ne/Si).

One - The Need to be Perfect

Two - The Need to be Needed

Three - The Need to Succeed

Four - The Need to be Special / Unique

Five  - The Need to Understand

Six - The Need for Certainty

Seven - The Need to Avoid Pain

Eight - The Need to Be Against

1.      Desires and Fears

1s desire perfection and fear unworthiness

2s desire love and fear abandonment

3s desire success and fear failure

4s desire specialness and fear normalcy

5s desire knowledge and fear incapability

6s desire security and fear instability

7s desire stimulation and fear entrapment

8s desire autonomy and fear enslavement

9s desire peace and fear disruption

2.      Order

The first fear and desire are those of your core type

This is followed by your wing

Then by your first fix

Then by your second fix

Then by your first fix’s wing

Then by your second fix’s wing

3.      Instinctual Variants’ Effect

Sp 1 turns its critical eye towards itself and thinks itself is in need of perfection.

So 1 upholds itself as a banner of virtue for others to follow as a mentor.

Sx 1 turns its critical heat and anger towards the outside world and thinks the outside world is in need of perfection.

Sp 2 acts in a childlike fashion to endear other to it.

So 2 helps the broader environment and takes on tasks to endear itself to others.

Sx 2 seduces an individual with a special relationship to endear itself to that person.

Sp 3 acts against vanity and overfocuses on its work and letting it speak for itself.

So 3 focuses on networking and presenting its polished image to as many people as possible.

Sx 3 tries to live up to a masculine or feminine ideal and make a strong attractive impression on others.

Sp 4 acts stoically and focuses on suffering in silence.

So 4 chronically compares itself to others to develop its identity.

Sx 4 focuses on sharing its powerful personal experience with others through emotional rawness and aggressive honesty.

Sp 5 focuses on hobbies and a safe space they can retreat to.

So 5 plays an advisor role to others and collects helpful information.

Sx 5 collects darker information and shares secrets or interesting information as a method of connection.

Sp 6 focuses on material safety and obsesses over details to keep itself secure.

So 6 ties itself to systems, organizations, and social roles to keep itself secure.

Sx 6 desperately ties itself to ideals of strength and bravery to keep itself secure.

Sp 7 focuses on lifestyle and personal, often permanent, pleasures (nice houses, fast cars, sex, etc.) as opposed to outside stimulation.

So 7 focuses on a utopian and idealistic image of the future and gives to others in the optimistic assumption they will give back.

Sx 7 focuses on new and sensational ideas and distractions with a focus on fresh experience.

Sp 8 acts as a survivalist and gathers the resources it needs to exist entirely independent of others.

So 8 acts as a protector to those around it and tries to remain powerful by shielding those less powerful.

Sx 8 acts in direct rebellion and emotional rawness against others, testing itself against others to find an ideal partner strong enough to surrender (often this search is unconscious.)

Sp 9 focuses on gathering resources so that it can remain stationary and uninvolved.

So 9 acts as an active peacemaker and works towards helping others to avoid conflict.

Sx 9 searches for an ideal partner to remain in stasis with, who will not disturb them or have conflict with them.

4.      Example

My friend is a 3w4 7w8 1w2 sx/sp

His core desires go:

Success>specialness>stimulation>perfection>autonomy>love

His core fears go:

Failure>normalcy>entrapment>unworthiness>enslavement>abandonment

His 3 is attractiveness focused with a side of work focus.

His 7 is fresh experience focused with a side of lifestyle focus.

His 1 is zeal focused with a side of self-criticism focus.

5.      Making the connections

This is a more intuitive (not iNtuitive) process. Make the connections from the basic core fear and desire (example: the core fear of failure feeds into all these other fears as a root cause and all these other fears in combination feed these behaviors)

Look at how the single core fear plays into every other behavior at play and every other fear at play. Flavor each attitude and behavior and fear based on every other factor.

One - The Need to be Perfect

Two - The Need to be Needed

Three - The Need to Succeed

Four - The Need to be Special / Unique

Five  - The Need to Understand

Six - The Need for Certainty

Seven - The Need to Avoid Pain

Eight - The Need to Be Against

(source)

Fives are intellectually curious types who love to explore what interests them. They frequently indulge in spending lots of time with what’s impractical. While they put lots of effort into thinking about things they have deceptively strong feelings however. They state their points dispassionately and insure what they communicate is well thought out which make them seem less emotional than they really are.

Fives take it for granted they have an inherent ability to theorize and understand things more deeply than others, something they’d never say openly. They are never quite “fully there” in their physical presence however. Their sensitivity to emotional stimuli plus a lack of smoothness from their less developed instincts always makes them removed to some degree to better handle situations. They withdraw from their environment and detach emotionally from others to shut out intrusions in their time and space. From the safety of their minds they can intensify their investment in their mental activities. They feel planning sufficiently and knowing enough can enable them to survive and thrive in life despite being isolated. This overuse of their thinking center to navigate an intrusive world from a distance causes them to be both idiosyncratic in how they perceive reality and eccentric as others perceive them. This causes fives to exhibit a certain quirky cleverness

Fives are far more sensitive than they appear. Being fear types they tend to feel a crippling anxiety that’s usually only noticed by close family and friends. Behind their distant exterior often lurks feelings threatening to overwhelm them. They prefer their privacy where they can immerse themselves in whatever interests them. Their limitless curiosity causes them to be self-motivated to learn challenging things and delve into subjects they truly enjoy, to the point of compulsion even. More than any other type they are connoisseurs of knowledge. As a result fives tend to have a few intellectual areas of interest they have a deep understanding in which they take great pride in. Many fives withhold their knowledge just as they withhold themselves however, hence the five stereotype of a reclusive expert that no one knows about.

Fives see an interdependent world that desires too much from them. It’s not uncommon to see them cut out dead weight and live minimalistic lifestyles to separate themselves from the world. They feel people want more of them than they have of themselves to give. They are affected by others easily and withdraw because they don’t believe they have what it takes to deal with other people’s demands and expectations. They are equally aware of being a burden on others and withhold both themselves and their emotions from others. Expressing emotions can make them feel vulnerable as they fear that will backfire in front of people who clearly don’t understand them. They don’t care for superficial small talk and limit themselves to authentic people who do have the potential to understand them. At work they prefer to be given their assignment then left alone. Even in relationships they may withhold parts of themselves and keep many secrets. Simply put fives are fear types who are always wary of people or things that come with “strings attached”. Because their instinctive center is weakest they fear “giving their power away” would lead to them being a “sitting duck.”

This fear of being a “sitting duck” leads fives to focus on having power. They remove themselves from external activity in order to feel they have enough mastery of the situation to navigate it from a position of strength. They separate what’s important from what’s irrelevant and have an unrelenting focus to get to the bottom of things. They delight in “checkmating” others’ points that aren’t as well thought-out as theirs along the way. Their intellectual curiosity for a subject is intense enough to eventually turn into mastery. They imagine scenarios to understand the world well enough to anticipate reality. They feel powerful trusting their own opinions over what society says. They think things are under control if they know enough. They think they can get on top of things on their own if they figure things out and plan sufficiently. They have delusions of grandeur that make them dream about how the world would be if they had the ability to set things. They feel powerful knowing that others haven’t thought about stuff as deeply as they have and don’t understand what they understand. This “claim” along with their borderline intellectual overconfidence is a cover on a more subconscious level for their heightened sensitivity and inadequacy though. It’s one thing to create theories but quite another to put them into practice. They have trouble with simpler things that most people can handle spontaneously. They know how odd they are and always feel fundamentally apart from others.

In enneagram theory fives are thinking-feeling-instinctive in that order. This causes them to intensify their efforts thinking up scenarios to anticipate and handle reality at the expense of being engaged in the real world. Because they are instinctive center last it is easy for fives to become ungrounded and spin out of control. They encounter new people in spontaneous situations and instead of acting naturally they detach or “freeze” (a very minor form of shutdown) to intellectualize their emotions (“How do I express this emotion?”) instead of using their feeling center to express their emotions (fear that could backfire on them). Opportunities to reach out to others are missed and fives loses confidence in their ability to act naturally around people. They spend more time alone with makes them more out of touch with the world. This increases their loneliness and eccentricity which makes it even harder to relate to people, which makes them withdraw and isolate themselves even further. Once a critical point is reached their cynicism and disdain for humanity accelerates. The scenarios their imagination comes up with to understand the world become more disturbing and further removed from reality. Healthy fives though are able to both fully participate in life and contribute to an interdependent society while also being able to give more of themselves and handle greater degrees of emotional interdependency. Their greater engagement of life allows them to be more in touch with reality and better at anticipating things.

5w4s are more fantastical and mythologize about how they aren’t human. They are natural iconoclasts and disidentification is central to their self-image. Seeing things the normal way that everyone else does just seems “wrong” to them. They don’t get as openly awed and appalled as their 5w6 siblings since worldly reality often pales in comparison to the reality of their internal experience. They are both more “cloaked” and also more emotionally immersing than 5w6s. They indulge in epic language to relive their feelings as anything less would seem too trite for the richness and significance of their internal experience. They tend to be less argumentative than 5w6s and would rather be convinced than convince others. They are more sociable and whimsical than 5w6s and want to show you there’s more to them than meets the eye.

The 5w4 inner landscape has a certain richness that’s both a blessing and a curse. From being both in awe and terrified of just about everything they’ve contemplated their minds are anything but “normal” in the way they perceive things. They think they will always know more about others than others will ever know about them. They feel they are impossible to get to know and the most one can see is whatever persona they exhibit. Similar to core fours they transform this into their own brand of elitism.

5w4s being iconoclasts force their way to the bottom of things to find meaning, safety with the known and familiar be damned. They have a “counter” mentality in how they focus on the undersides and opposites of things: “It was so dark it became light”…“that abhorrent yet fascinating person”. Paradoxes, illusions, the twists and turns of fate, and unexplainable phenomena are representative of “something” that underlies and supersedes current reality and makes it richer. The unseen is more important than the seen. What is intangible matters more than what is tangible. What isn’t obvious matters more than what is obvious. What is counterintuitive and fits is more aesthetic and elegant and therefore more significant than what is intuitive and fits. If the pieces fit when they shouldn’t it’s “anything but coincidental” and can be traced to something meaningful. When something is counterintuitive and makes sense it feels like a deep insight that was divinely revealed to them, a rare and special treasure that shows itself once in a blue moon. Something that’s intuitive and makes sense is a dime a dozen that can only pale in comparison.

5w4s tend to be more subjective than 5w6s. Their thinking process is less incremental and has more “illogical leaps”. They search for that one angle of looking at things that magically makes everything make sense to them. They have a bias towards seeing underlying patterns that fit together aesthetically and elegantly as more real and therefore closer to the truth. They see a plethora of nonrandom things that just happen to line up towards a single conclusion as evidence of some “higher meaning” to support their conclusion, or even an indication of fate. Such a lining up of tells amidst random chaos couldn’t be chance or random. There must be something there that isn’t obvious but no less significant if not more so. This makes 5w4s more likely to see things that aren’t there than miss things that are there. They tend to have occultic and esoteric areas of interest.

5w6s see themselves as being fundamentally apart from others due to their oddness. They aspire to be one of society’s foremost thinkers. They tend to be more awed at a world that never ceases to provide them with something to look into further. They are natural investigators who take the initiative to enthusiastically debate and discuss with others how they see the world. They tend to be more self-revealing and more emotionally detached than their 5w4 siblings. They have more of an uneasy truce with their emotions. On average they are less sociable than 5w4s. While they also think there is more to them than meets the eye they feel more awkward about showing others this.

The 5w6 inner landscape is one of limitless curiosity, arguably the most of the eighteen subtypes. They’ve thought a lot about the world and the nature of things with an unrivaled specificity. They’ve seemingly thought about everything at one point or another from the complex to the simple. They’ve looked further into things than most others. As a result they feel they have an understanding of the way things are in the world that others don’t. Others haven’t examined things to the extent that they have. They think most people don’t understand them and aren’t likely to put in the effort to do so.

5w6 aesthetics are rooted in what is tangible and more easily seen due to their six wing. They envision being on the cutting edge of technological advancement as well as on the frontier of intellectual and physical realms. They contemplate exploring where few have gone before and witnessing worldly phenomena firsthand. They wonder what it’s like to be inside the tiniest of probes observing life at the cellular level, or to be safely suspended in the fabric of space-time far away amidst black holes and other awesome anomalies of the cosmos. From these vantage points they are removed from the world of people yet tethered to the furthest reaches of the universe. Their sense of being in touch with these various frontiers beyond human experience has a highly intuitive and emotional aspect to it. There is a certain nirvana that’s connected with understanding these worldly phenomena which also serves as an escape from reality. When they tap into that it feels empowering and feeds their tendency to think they have mastery over elements in the world. The more confident they are of their grasp of reality the more in control they feel and the easier it is to take action in the world without hesitation.

5w6s tend to have more sequential and incremental streams of consciousness and lack the “illogical leaps” of 5w4s. There is a process of gradual solidification to their reasoning that makes them natural synthesizers of what they take into account. They tend to have a “one thing progresses to another” way of coming to a conclusion that’s generally more precise and easier to follow. They have bias against solutions arrived at primarily aesthetically for not being objective enough. They prefer a thinking process that is more “valid” and can withstand more scrutiny. They are more likely to see a bunch of things that cluster as “coincidental” and not an indication of some higher meaning that they can’t explain, unless they can tie things in the cluster together in some way. They tend to not believe in fate. Much of life is random and they accept that. They are more likely to miss things that are there than see things that aren’t there like their 5w4s siblings. They tend to be more methodical and analytical and gravitate to more structured intellectual areas.

5 vs 1: Fives unlike ones don’t need to adhere to standards that apply to everyone to think they are good enough. Unlike fives the way ones are rational is tied to self-control. Ones find it easy to engage the world while fives find it draining. Fives don’t need to obey the rules while ones are compliant to the rules.

5 vs 2: Twos like people and feel a need to be in a facilitating role for others while fives are very comfortable withdrawing from people.

5 vs 3: Threes are much more comfortable promoting themselves. Fives find it awkward to sell themselves in any capacity.

5 vs 4: Fives periodically feel overwhelmed by their emotions and have to detach from them while fours are at home in their emotions and can’t amplify them enough.

5 vs 6: Fives are naturally curious types and love knowledge for its own sake. They are oblivious to procedures and policies in power structures. Unlike sixes their first instinct is to intellectualize their emotions.

5 vs 7: Fives like to operate at some distance from the environment while sevens move the environment closer to them. Fives have a limited amount of themselves while sevens have lots of energy. Sevens are naturally spontaneous.

5 vs 8: Eights don’t periodically feel overwhelmed by their feelings. Instincts are an eight’s strength while being a five’s weakness.

Want to know what your type is? Take the test here

Enneagram is the main reason people with the same MBTI type might seem very different from each other. Where MBTI deals with how you take in and process information, Enneagram is what motivates you.

CORE TYPE

Your core type tells about the most dominant motivations of your personality. This type is what everything else is filtered through. Your core type cannot change throughout life.

INSTINCTUAL VARIANTS

Enneagram recognizes three different instincts:

self-preservation (SP)

social (SOC)

sexual (SX).

SP is often characterized by an interest in health, safety, and security. SOC has an eye on the interpersonal, political, and species survival. SX deals with intensity, chemistry between people, and expression. You usually use these in different order.

TRITYPE

Tritype deals with your coping mechanisms.

Each type describes the way you deal with each centre. Head centre tells how you deal with fear, gut how you deal with anger, and heart how you cope with shame.

The types associated with each area are: Shame: 2, 3, 4 Fear: 5, 6, 7 Anger: 8, 9, 1

Pulled off PersonalityCafe. Saw no cited source. (Know it? Tell me.)

Enneagram 5

At their best: profound vision, objective insight, innovative exploration.

Mid-levels: comprehensive knowledge, intense preoccupation, cynical argumentation.

At their worst: eccentric nihilism, phobic delirium, psychotic paralysis.

Healthy 5w4: more able to participate in life. When the fiveish desire to withdraw and sort things out is no longer compulsive, the consciously chosen time alone becomes a tool for understanding the world, rather than an entrapping habit. The fourish passion for beauty emerges as the conscious result of harnessing the emotions rather than being their slave. Begin to deeply understand the simple, elegant way the awesome complexity of the world emerges from fundamental principles. They find great joy in watching and learning. When the perception of five and the passion of four are augmented by eight’s power and leadership, plus one’s intuitive wisdom, clear comprehensions can be transmitted to others.

Unhealthy 5w4: gets lost in the details. The compulsive analysis of five can lead to elaborate pseudo-logical constructions designed to explain everything. The four-wing’s emotionality adds a flavor of dramatic hopelessness. Others Simply Do Not Understand. No one could understand. Retreats to a place of safety, hoping to escape from view, continuing to uncover the truth. There is little to no social involvement. The panic and scattered mania of seven combine with twoish self-congratulatory hysteria. Can come back into the world, awkward and excitable, ready to bolt but ready to passionately defend a bizarre, baroque fantasy world. As inner tension builds, schizoid withdrawal becomes more and more likely. The end result is a kind of terrified fugue, completely cut off from reality. The only escape from constant overwhelming chaos is inward.

Healthy 5w6: gains social ease. Deep perception and serene faith combine for a kind of knowing that focuses on the truth of human interactions. Overcomes the fear of intimacy and finds satisfaction in genuine relationships. Strikes a balance between the urge to withdraw to sort things out and the desire to feel safe among trusted friends. The need diminishes to protect against deceit by constantly analyzing people, leading to greater comfort and depth in friendship. Brings together the powerful insight of five, the stamina and leadership of eight, the deep faith and genuineness of six, and the inner peace of nine.

Unhealthy 5w6: becomes afraid of people. Mistrust interacts with reductionist analysis, and the world begins to seem more threatening. Threeish competitive urges might emerge, combining with sevenish mania to create a kind of intense, argumentative combativeness to hide a deep sense of inadequacy. This turns people away, leading to a greater sense of isolation. Tends to rationalize that most people are not honest anyway, and since other people fail to recognize the value of their brilliant ideas, they are not worth knowing at all. Paranoia and anxiety lead 5w6 into a terrifying spiral in which increasingly bizarre fabrications may be used to explain meaning into even the most mundane events.

Enneagram 6

At their best: self-affirming courage, faithful affection, responsible discipline.

Mid-levels: dutiful loyalty, anxious ambivalence, belligerent scapegoating.

At their worst: needy conformism, paranoid obsession, self-destructive panic.

Healthy 6w5: becomes free of anxiety and reductionist analysis, allowing their endearing gentility and good humor to emerge. Laughs easily, with a sense of relief. Can it really be so simple to live and enjoy life? There is a feeling of relaxed good nature and certainty. This is a person you can trust, someone to rely on for true friendship. Turns into a warm and deeply loving person, someone in touch with a real universal authority, internally and externally available. Acts with quiet confidence, coming from a place of peaceful faith. Essential sixness brings deep interpersonal bonding, essential fiveness builds penetrating perception, and nineish tranquility combines with eightish personal power.

Unhealthy 6w5: begins to feel anxious and wants to run away to a protected place. Unable to trust inner or outer authority, they search for an explanation for the constant tension. Others are easy to blame, and by projecting the causes of anxiety outward, 6w5 can find a temporary release. With increased stress, 6w5 loses faith in the blaming. No explanation for the anxiety satisfies, and the world begins to seem like a horrible, frightening game. Paranoia escalates. Bounces rapidly from fearful withdrawal to tense, overconfident pretense. Everyone is out to get me, and there is no place to run. I’m frightened out of my wits, and I know I am headed for a complete breakdown, but maybe if I can get myself into enough trouble someone will come and rescue me.

Healthy 6w7: has a feeling of firm steadiness, sure-footed and quiet. Sevenish impulsivity and sixish anxiety diminish, replaced by a calm deliberateness. Although fun and companionship are still highly valued, the desperate longing for security converts into inner strength. Finds a deep sense of belonging to the universe, and to mankind. Nineish calm and sixish faith combine with sevenish joy and fiveish perception. Shares with others a sense of eternal companionship and security.

Unhealthy 6w7: visibly desperate. Anxiety and insecurity become powerful controlling influences. Jumping from one colorful emotional state to another, trying to find any way to quell the increasing sense of uncertainty and vulnerability. They looks for someone out there who will help, but finds no one to trust. Will try anything to escape from the increasingly intolerable situations that arise. Physical illness, car troubles, boyfriends, girlfriends, landlords, all become scapegoats for the real problem of inner helpless dependence. You are either all-good or all-bad, and whether I like you or not can change from moment to moment. My very identity splits into fragments as I desperately cut myself into pieces to escape the horrible sense of impending catastrophe.

Enneagram 7

At their best: ecstatic gratitude, spontaneous enthusiasm, passionate accomplishment.

Mid-levels: active materialism, restless superficiality, addictive excess.

At their worst: irresponsible debauchery, manic hysteria, burnt-out debilitation.

Healthy 7w6: finds a new kind of centered calmness, as impulsivity and the desire to entertain fall away. Instead of shifting to another mood, they wait and see where this one leads. The slippery, happy-go-lucky quality is replaced by a smooth feeling of attentive watchfulness. A kind of directed, joyful intelligence like a sure presence, with an unlimited attention span. Becomes the master of many talents because of fiveish perceptivity, combined with deep fulfillment and pleasure from the experience of being fully present. Profoundly grateful for the continuing opportunity to take part in the unfolding drama of life. What a gorgeous, unpredictably fantastic world! What incredible beauty there is in even the smallest details of this universe! How excitingly alive I feel, and how at-one with the world! Let’s celebrate together the deep abundance of life and love.

Unhealthy 7w6: the search for ever-increasing levels of excitement and stimulation seems like a way out of the apparent trap of boredom and unease, but it brings only temporary relief. Maybe another kind of fun will help me avoid this increasing sense of hopeless ambivalence. Maybe I should start a new company, or have a great big party! Tries to find the answer in increasingly grand plans for great, exciting events. As the ever-growing fear and boredom keep coming back, excessive stimulation approaches dangerous levels. Without increasing awareness, this course of exciting overload leads to extreme exhaustion, and an incapacitating despairing depression. At the bottom of the scale of health, 7w6 becomes a worn-out husk, utterly debilitated by drugs, sexual excess, and general over-stimulation, and totally incapable of self-care. At every opportunity, every means available is used to provide some escape.

Healthy 7w8: settles down. Become aware of the compulsive nature of the desire for excess and learn how to moderate the constant power-trip. Finds other people are easier to get along with when they are not being pushed or receiving a hard-sell on some wild idea. Love and appreciation for subtlety become important aspects of a life that includes increasing amounts of silent, peaceful contemplation. Discovers by letting the mind’s chatter come to an end, a new level of perception emerges, with a greater understanding of how the world fits together. Instead of exploding outward into impulsive activity, 7w8 harnesses enthusiasm for practical uses. Life becomes a joyful, loving celebration. Look how much we have been given! Jump into the universe with both feet! Find your power and become what you were meant to be!

1 - Your morals do not match their morals 

2 - You are being selfish

3 - You are being lazy

4 - They perceived you as fake/unoriginal

5 - You are being really dumb

6 - You scared them

7 - You are boring and/or forcing them to make a commitment 

8 - You are trying to control them 

Healthy Fives demonstrate true neutrality, possess deep knowledge in several areas of their life, and are eager to share their findings with others. They see themselves as part of things rather than separate from everything, and balance their participation with their observation.

Five Traits

Fives take care of themselves, and believe others should do the same

Fives believe knowledge is essential for survival

Fives can be sarcastic and cynical, but don’t always share it

Fives often feel awkward around other people

Fives are suspicious when others ask personal information

Fives do not like others prying into their feelings

Fives need time to process their emotions

Fives would rather observe than participate

Fives hold onto what they have and find others wasteful

Fives guard their time and energy

Fives prefer small gatherings to larger ones (introverted)

Fives fear they do not have sufficient inner resources to function

Fives often felt invisible as a child, and choose to be invisible as an adult

Fives hate being uninformed

Fives find no happiness in material possessions

Fives do not often easily share of themselves with others

Enneagram Wings

5w4: are more creative, sensitive, empathetic, and self-absorbed, eccentric, uncertain of their feelings, and melancholic. 4 makes them more tender with themselves and less emotionally guarded with others.

5w6: are more fearful, anxious, skeptical, and distrusting, but also more social and loyal. They live more in their minds and question authority and the status quo, while also seeking to form alliances with others. Often socially awkward but enjoy forming friendships.

Under stress: Fives act like unhealthy Sevens, where they horde and cling more closely to things, which makes their world feel like it is shrinking. When this happens, they focus on their need for comfort, safety, and independence and ignore others. They become frivolous, disorganized, and distracted, unable to complete tasks, and do not think through the consequences of their behavior. They can be rude, dismissive, and condescending.

When feeling secure: Fives move to the positive side of Eight, and become more spontaneous, outspoken, and physically present, able to want to experience life in all its abundance and courageous enough to do it.

Advice for the 5: do not disconnect from your feelings. Practice building emotional connections to others, and sharing of yourself with your loved ones. Try to experience feelings in the moment, not postpone them for “later.” You can afford to give away your knowledge, your experiences, and your wisdom to others; doing so, will not make you weaker, but form stronger relationships. Believe there’s enough to go around. It’s okay to need someone, or have them need you. Letting someone else serve you can be blessing to them and to you. Start trusting others with your shared experiences. Allow yourself an occasional new luxury. Find an activity that will connect you to your body. Even if you are unsure, step into a conversation rather than falling silent.

Influences on MBTI Types:

ISTJ: stockpiles enormous amounts of information on various subjects, to feel secure in an uncertain world with unpredictable futures (inferior Ne); secretive and often disconnected from their feelings, more than is usual in an ISTJ; resentful when others prove incompetent or ‘needy’; often detached in their romantic relationships, and ‘secretive’ about the past.

ESTJ: confident in utilizing resources and in the workplace, but less social than other ESTJs and more cautious in approaching new projects that involve much risk; deeply analytical and tactical in their approach, with a mentality of “saving” rather than spending; may push aside intense feelings and inferior Fi refuse to deal with them, leading to relationship problems; may put too much pressure on their children to be self-reliant and frustrated if they are not.

ISFJ: stockpiles enormous amounts of information on various subjects, to feel secure in an uncertain world with unpredictable futures (inferior Ne); strong Ti development / reliance, so a much more detached Fe user, who does not like to talk about their feelings and may never truly deal with them; careful what information they share with who, and not actively social.

ESFJ: a more ‘detached’ Fe-dom, sometimes reliant on inferior Ti, more secretive and distrustful than other ESFJs; careful what information they share with who, and drained in social situations; often takes an interest in a wide variety of topics, for their own sake and to prepare for possible future problems (tert-Ne). May desperately want deep emotional connections but not know how to forge them.

INTJ: always looking into the future for potential issues and trying to correct them in the present through stockpiling factual knowledge and useful skills; somewhat fearful of too much engagement with the outside world due to inferior Se issues; sometimes deals with numb emotions and/or delayed emotional reactions; selective in their relationships, and not forthcoming in their personal experiences.

ENTJ: confident in utilizing resources and in the workplace, but less social than other ENTJs and without the ‘expensive’ streak often present in tert-Se users (forgoes symbols of power or influence, possibly fearful it may draw undo negative attention); deeply analytical and tactical in their approach; may push aside intense feelings and inferior Fi refuse to deal with them, leading to relationship problems; may put too much pressure on their children to be self-reliant and frustrated if they are not.

INFJ: always looking into the future for potential issues and trying to correct them in the present through stockpiling factual knowledge and useful skills; somewhat fearful of too much engagement with the outside world due to inferior Se issues; strong Ti development / reliance, so a much more detached Fe user, who does not like to talk about their feelings and may never truly deal with them; distrustful of what others may do “in the future” with shared information, and not actively social.

ENFJ: a more ‘detached’ Fe-dom, sometimes reliant on inferior Ti, more secretive and distrustful than other ENFJs, often paranoid due to high Ni issues combined with low Ti tendencies to find evidence to support rather than disassemble high Ni ‘inventions of reality’; forgoes symbols of power or influence, possibly fearful it may draw undo negative attention, and may scorn others who place emphasis on luxuries or appearances.

ESTP: stronger access to aux-Ti analytical abilities, without the usual emphasis on ‘living high and loose’; more introverted / easily drained, less inclined to take charge; may loop into Fe, and not know how to handle it, but fail to entirely subdue their emotions and wind up frustrated; more fearful of the ‘potential’ outcome of their decisions (inferior Ni).

ISTP: strong desire for independence and isolation, pushes away from others and may forgo human relationships on a deeper level, out of 5 and inferior Fe discomfort with intense emotions in oneself and others; has less emotional outbursts than other Enneagram ISTPs, and more trouble understanding what motivates their feelings; much less ‘hands on’ in trying new things.

ESFP: hyper aware of the environment and eager to learn useful skills, but deeply secretive about their intense internal emotions, and will take longer to process them away from others; may deliberately delay dealing with them by looping into Te, which they build up so as to feel competent and safe in the external world; more fearful of the ‘potential’ outcome of their decisions (inferior Ni).

ISFP: super secretive loners who are more analytical, less emotional, more detached, and more interested in impersonal knowledge, which will help them feel safe in the external world; determined to be self reliant, awkward with emotions, and sometimes ‘blocked’ from the true intensity of their feelings. Strong desire to ‘predict’ what is coming and prepare for it (Se/Ni development).

ENTP: a more focused, less distracted ENTP, who knows a hundred facts about a thousand different things, but finds it hard to retain details, which makes them less secure in dealing with the external sensory world; more introverted / easily drained, less inclined to take charge; may loop into Fe, and not know how to handle it, but fail to entirely subdue their emotions and wind up frustrated. May mistype as an INTP.

INTP: strong desire for independence and isolation, pushes away from others and may forgo human relationships on a deeper level, out of 5 and inferior Fe discomfort with intense emotions in oneself and others; often takes an avid interest in and tries to perfect useful knowledge in many different areas, seeks security in routine and prone to severe hording / holding onto things long past their ‘expiration’ date.

ENFP: insecure about the impractical nature of their Ne-dom status, and will work hard to compensate for it through practical knowledge; fearful the future may find them ‘unprepared’; suspicious of others, deeply secretive about their intense internal emotions, and will take longer to process them away from others; may deliberately delay dealing with them by looping into Te, which they build up so as to feel competent and safe in the external world.

INFP: super secretive loners who are more analytical, less emotional, more detached, and more interested in impersonal knowledge, which will help them feel safe in the external world; determined to be self reliant, awkward with emotions, and sometimes ‘blocked’ from the true intensity of their feelings; feels ‘detached from the world’ and takes an interest in many different things, to compensate for it (Ne/Si).