About As Well Adjusted As You Would Think

their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.

longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years

toxic flesh

has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.

lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion

largest genome of any shark

eats everything including moose and polar bears

ⓘ Fact Check

There are currently no jurisdictions worldwide that mandate the addition of pussy to drinking water, nor have any clinical trials shown that the addition of pussy to drinking water has any significant effect on the heath of lesbians.

真夏の夜の夢 (A Midsummer's Night Dream) by Yamagishi Ryoko from the manga Arabesque.

The Mantikos Dedication is a 20 cm high late Geometric bronze sculpture dating from the early Archaic period (7th century BC), said to have been found at Thebes. Although the identification of the figure as Apollo is contested (arguments continue over whether the figure represents the divine recipient or the mortal donor), an inscription in archaic Boeotian characters on the thighs in dactylic hexameter reads:

ΜΑΝΤΙΚΛΟΣΜΑΝΕΘΕΚΕFΕΚΑΒΟΛΟΙΑΡΓΥΡΟΤΟΧΣΟΙΤΑΣΔΕΚΑΤΑΣΤΥΔΕΦΟΙΒΕΔΙΔΟΙΧΑΡΙFΕΤΤΑΝΑΜΜΟΙ

"Mantiklos offers me as a tithe to the Far Shooter, the silver-bowed god; do you, Phoibos, give some pleasing favor in return."

"Far shooter" and "silver-bowed" are noteworthy as two Homeric epithets of Apollo, both of which occur in the first 50 lines of the Iliad. The piece is a votive gift of a male figure, preserved from the knees up and nude except for what might be a belt around his waist (indicated by an incised band). Some object or objects would have been held in the outstretched left hand and in the now lost right arm: if Apollo, likely a bow and arrow.

Ares: I am going to fucking kill that guy >:(

Aphrodite: Oh no you wont >:(

Laura: So like...sisters?

Carmilla: Your obliviousness is exhausting.

Laura: Are you a boy donning a disguise to woo me in secret?

Act like Megalochelys atlas and smile, because it’s Fossil Friday! One of the largest known land turtles, scientists think this massive reptile could reach heights of 5.9 ft (1.8 m)—tall enough to look a grown human in the eye. This specimen’s shell measures some 7.4 ft (2.3 m) long and in life, it may have weighed more than 2,000 lbs (907 kg). Megalochelys lived during the Late Pliocene about 2 million years ago. The fossil on display in the Museum’s Hall of Vertebrate Origins was found in 1922 in Chandigarh, India.   You can spot this giant, and more, at the Museum! Plan your visit.

Photo: © AMNH