NIKKISLAA

There is nothing wrong outside, The sky is wide, the air is light, But inside, the walls close tight, A cage I cannot see, but fight.

Silent screams no one can hear, Whispers of my darkest fear, Thoughts that spin and never cease, Chasing shadows, no release.

I am tired, not because I am weak, But because I’ve fought every day this week. The world moves fast, but I feel slow, Like a river lost in where to go.

I smile with friends, I laugh, I try, But the silence hits when I say goodbye. There’s a weight I carry no one sees, A storm that never quite lets me breathe.

Still - I wake. I rise. Not because I want to, but because I can. Because somewhere inside, A soft, small voice still stands.

Some days I feel like fading out, Like screaming loud, but not aloud. Like curling in, becoming small, Afraid to rise, afraid to fall.

But somewhere deep, a flicker stays, A stubborn spark that won’t go away. Not a hope, but more like flame, That whispers, “You are not to blame.”

I loved you like storms love the sea loud and reckless but also carefree

You were never gentle, but God, you were real. You hurt me I still stayed, not because I was weak, but because I believed.

Every smile from you was a sunshine Even if it burned my skin I’d take it every time

Running in the wild, I lost myself in your chase, The flowers you promised but never truly gave.

Adrenaline in his kiss, dopamine in his smile. He sets my soul on fire, but he brings me back to life.

He came like a calm wind, After drowning me in his storm, He told me he had learned, to love me the way I always want.

But my heart is scared ,

The calmness feels so unreal, What if its a dream,

He's a midnight chase, Sirens in my veins, A kiss like a lightning strike, Burning through the rain.

But also… He is the morning sun on my skin, The stillness in my chest, Laughter wrapped in quiet hours, A place my soul can rest.

You’re the rhythm I return to, The calm beneath the storm, A thousand gentle pulses That keep my spirit warm.