Missy Dumpster

elwiwis for the NGS discord ♥

Ack, thanks so much man! I'm glad someone likes the silly PokéGermany critters as well 🇩🇪

And yes. Bundesaetos wants to hang out with you too!

ULMICHAN PURRLOIN

Devious Pokemon

Type: Steel

Ability: Sturdy, Motor Drive

Hidden Ability: Mold Breaker

Gender Ratio: 50% male, 50% female

Evolution:

Ulmichan Purrloin evolves into Ulmichan Liepard when evolved at or after Level 20.

Pokedex Entry:

East - Heavily theorized to be the result of an experiment, this Pokemon was first sighted in Ulmich during the forties.

West - This Pokemon is incredibly stoic and unbothered. It is said that even being struck by a bolt of lightning would not change its demeanor.

Base Stats:

HP - 36

Attack - 50

Defense - 65

Sp. Atk - 40

Sp. Def - 55

Speed - 35

Total: 281

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ULMICHAN LIEPARD

Cruel Pokemon

Type: Steel/Electric

Ability: Sturdy, Motor Drive

Hidden Ability: Mold Breaker

Gender Ratio: 50% male, 50% female



Evolution:

Ulmichan Liepard only evolves into Panzerpard when given an Artillery Mandate, a rare item given out only to members inside the Ulmichan military or government. Due to this, most Liepard will not evolve.

Pokedex Entry:

East - Contrary to their Unovan counterparts, the Liepard of Ulmich are helpful and loyal companions to their trainers.

West - Liepard generates electricity through its conductive whiskers. Their plug tails provide thousands of watts of energy.



Base Stats:

HP - 50

Attack - 90

Defense - 95

Sp. Atk - 60

Sp. Def - 85

Speed - 66

Total : 446

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PANZERPARD

Mercenary Pokemon

Type: Steel/Fighting

Ability: Sturdy, Bulletproof

Hidden Ability: Mold Breaker

Gender Ratio: 50% male, 50% female

Pokedex Entry:

East - This manmade Pokemon was engineered to resist even the most devastating explosions. Gunfire ricochets off of it like rain.

West - In times of war, Ulmich is known to provide troops of Panzerpard to its allies.



Base Stats:

HP - 60

Attack - 115

Defense - 150

Sp. Atk - 60

Sp. Def - 120

Speed - 60

For real bro. My silly kitty. My funny meower. Dare I say even

It's Jo Koenig and Werner! In the odd thirty years they've been a duo, Jo's changed quite a bit. She's a lot less approachable nowadays, and sometimes finds it difficult to keep a pace without stumbling. Thankfully, Werner, the big lug, is there to help her out.

As the team's de facto leader, this chipper ol' Chesnaught is like a personal trainer mixed with a motivational speaker. Cheering on both his trainer and his teammates, he is a bastion of positivity and support where others would fail.

Johanna and her silly baby robot dino! Aggron's definitely not as robust as most of his kind and doesn't like fighting much, but when he must, he'll tear it up - followed thereafter by him rushing over to his fainted opponents and apologizing profusely. He is a very sweet boy.

Alright, hear me out: It's in reference to the 19th-century railway magnate, Cornelius Vanderbilt, and that would make their initials IV and EV respectively.

More Ulmich lore! This mon's actually a concept I've had for an ungodly amount of time, but I thought it'd be a pretty appropriate inclusion to Ulmich considering its themes.

GENERAL INFORMATION

Species Name: Schroentgen

"The Atomic Age Pokemon"

Type: Poison/Steel

Gender: Genderless

Ability:

Mutually Assured Destruction - Upon entering a battle, the user poisons all opponents, including itself.

Base Stats:

HP - 100

Atk - 90

Def - 90

Sp. Atk - 160

Sp. Def - 90

Speed - 150

TOTAL: 680

Its signature move is "Criticality," a Poison-type special attack with a base damage of 120 and a PP of 5.

Dex Entry: Schroentgen was the result of a nuclear experiment during the middle of the 20th century. After several scientists fell deeply ill from acute radiation sickness, it was decommissioned and buried deep underground.

Schroentgen's name is derived from Erwin Schrodinger, the Austrian scientist behind the Schrodinger's Cat experiment, and Roentgen, a unit measuring ionizing radiation named after Wilhelm Rontgen, a German physicist.

Schroentgen was built in an Ulmichan lab in the early 50s, a shining example of Ulmichan ingenuity during the early Atomic Age. It's a self-contained nuclear power plant, able to give out massive amounts of energy in such a short amount of time. Its legs are cooling towers, with valves under its feet that allow it to intake water necessary for cooling itself, preventing overheating that could cause a meltdown. For the time, it was a massive achievement.

However, due to the limited knowledge of how nuclear power works at the time, much of the plutonium, uranium, and radium compounds inside Schroentgen were improperly stored, leading to leakage.

As a result, many people fell ill after exposure to Schroentgen within a relative radius of three miles, all of which suffered from various forms of radiation sickness. The closer one was to the Pokemon, the more severe their symptoms were. Many scientists involved in the Schroentgen experiment fell into critical condition due to ARS (Acute Radiation Sickness) after constant exposure to the nuclear feline.

In a government cover-up situation, the Ulmichan federal authorities quietly made the decree to decommission and bury Schroentgen deep under the Earth, under massive amounts of lead, in order to prevent further sickness and loss of life. To this day, most Ulmichans are unaware of the Schroentgen's existence, or what it was that caused so many people to become so sick and covered in exposure burns during the 50s.

After many decades underground, Schroentgen fell into disrepair. Where its compounds were once improperly stored, it now actively expelled incredibly dangerous radiation, with lava-hot fuel dripping from its pipes. If ever it were to unearth itself, Schroentgen would pose much more of an active threat to Ulmich than it did in the 1950s. Without proper cooling, it could explode at any given moment, creating a massive exclusion zone. Do NOT touch the cat's burial site, no matter your reason - it's blocked off by the government for a very good reason.

This is the unnecessary consequence of me wanting the protagonist of a shitfic to be a silly german middle aged woman. Please accept this funky little map before I open the exposition floodgates!

General Information

Ulmich is a region in what would be Pokemon's equivalency of Europe. It's pretty much just a yassified PokeGermany. It's in the center of this alleged "PokeContinent," and shares a border with the Kalos region to the west.

The official language of Ulmich is Ulmichan (which is just German), though most Ulmichans are bilingual, fluent in both their native tongue and either Galarian (English), Kalosian (French), or another.

The legendary Pokemon of Ulmich is Bundesaetos, a regal black eagle that Ulmich credits as its founder. Instead of using "Arceus" as a sort of stand-in word for "God," Ulmichans will often use "Bundesaetos" instead. This is not to say Bundesaetos usurps Arceus as a God, but rather that it's such an important piece of Ulmichan culture that it warrants its own everyday use.

Despite this, Bundesaetos hasn't been sighted in quite some time.

Cities [In Order of Population]

Zergen is the capital of Ulmich, as well as its most populated city. It's the industrial, financial, and government heartland of the region, a true concrete jungle if the country ever had one. This city is quite fast-paced and crowded, so cars aren't the most effective form of transportation. Instead, Zergen's got quite the underground transit system, providing commuters access to most of the city.

Additionally, Zergen is home to Zergen International Airport (ZIA), and Zergen University, among others. As far as the Pokemon League goes, Zergen has no gyms, nor is it the home of the Elite Four - but it's a must on the bucket list for tourists!

Waldig is the second most populated city in Ulmich but definitely has Zergen beat in terms of trade. It's the one Ulmich city that's right on the sea. Besides ingoing cargo ships from Galar, Kalos, or Paldea, Waldig has quite a lovely maritime beachfront and a shockingly successful cruise industry! Waldig is home to Ulmich's first and easiest gym, specializing in Water-type Pokemon.

Schwassberg is the third most populated city in Ulmich, which is quite ironic considering its placement in the more treacherous reaches of the region. However, it's mostly unperturbed by the Stahlgrenze Range due to its placement juuuust outside of its boundaries. Schwassberg residents are noticeably more laid-back than most other Ulmichans, and this is exemplified best in their world-renowned annual beer festival (Yes, we're talking Oktoberfest). You're gonna see a lot of silly Unovans come to Schwassberg for a keg or two.

Schwassberg hosts the eighth and final gym, as well as the most difficult. Considering the range that surrounds it, it's appropriate that the gym specializes in the Steel-type.

Munseedorf, lying right by the heart of the West Munsee River, is home to lovely scenery alongside the calming sounds of Munsee's current. Being closest to Kalos, a lot of Munseedorf's population is fluent in Kalosian, and the general culture is much more mixed between Kalos and Ulmich than in other parts of the region. Munseedorf houses the sixth gym, specializing in Grass-type Pokemon.

Strossem borders the Kitzberg Range to the east. As such, the city provides lovely, albeit daunting views of Mt. Kleinkrieg. Known for the "Strossem Sausage" and a thriving skiing industry, the city's doing quite well for itself. Strossem is home to the seventh gym in the Pokemon League lineup, specializing in the Bug-type.

Nachtfurt is the closest to what you could consider smack-dab in the middle of the region. It is widely considered as the "garden city" of Ulmich, as even the most urbanized squares of Nachtfurt are sprawling with gardens and forest cover. It's definitely got a gothic academia vibe. Nachtfurt is home to the fifth gym, which specializes in Ghost-type Pokemon.

Vechtwald, aside from Zergen, must be Ulmich's most blatantly historic city. Walking around the central streets will display a centuries-long myriad of architecture, from the newest marketplace to the oldest cathedral. Vechtwald is home to the second Pokemon gym, working with Dark-types.

Rosenschen is a city caught in the aridest part of Ulmich. Surrounded by the Rosenkranz Desert and Norwuste Range, Bundesaetos knows that it's a bit hard for things to grow. Citizens make it work, though, capitalizing on a sort of cowboy aesthetic to attract tourism. Rosenschen's gym is fourth in the League lineup, focusing on the Ground-type.

Mecklenstadt is the ninth and final city of note in the Ulmich Region. While it's not a buzzing metropolis, Mecklenstadt is quaint and historic, a much less busybodied rendition of Zergen. The city itself is probably best known for both its many Pokemon sanctuaries alongside its monopoly on Ulmich's northeastern beachfront. Mecklenstadt houses the third gym in the Ulmich League, Dragon-type in nature.

Towns and Villages

Rodenheim is the northernmost settlement in the Ulmich Region, situated at the very crest. It's like Waldig, but a much more downsized and rural version. If Ulmich were a game, Rodenheim would be the player's hometown.

Nordmund is primarily known as a fun art town. Have you got a love of gardens, old imperial palaces, and chocolate? Nordmund's got you covered, so long as you can put up with pretentious hipsters.

Kirchatz is very similar to Vechtwald in the old architecture field, minus the city aspect or secularism. Kirchatz people tend to be pretty religious, so if you're an Arceus-fearing fellow then I suppose you'd be right where you ought to be. For the rest of us, it's a bit awkward - but at least the churches look pretty.

Kalingen is a glorified rest stop. I believe in Kalingen slander.

Augureich, sitting right at the base of Ulmich's highest peak, is a village absolutely pelted by rain and snow. Augureich's a mining town, to be sure, but it's also full of spirituality and mystique. Legends say that Augureich was the birthplace of Bundesaetos. If you manage to outlast the blizzard on the way, here's to hoping you have enough money for a monk!

Gipfelitz, Ulmich's southwesternmost point, is the home of the Pokemon League itself. That's right - this little place is where the Elite Four and Champion conduct business. In Gipfelitz, upon a horizontal mountain face, belies a massive cathedral: The Pokemon League building. Walk right on in! If you dare.

Waterways

River Munsee is Ulmich's longest river, spanning out to reach across much of the northern and central reaches. Because of its shape, Munsee is divided into two parts: East and West Munsee. These rivers are vital for the prosperity of Munseedorf, Nachtfurt, Nordmund, Vechtwald, Strossem, and Kalingen.

Brandewitz River is the lifeline of Zergen and Waldig, and certainly the busiest waterway in the region as a result. Both cities use Brandewitz to ship their cargo to and from their ports, as well as the rest of Ulmich through smaller channels.

Herald River is the most straightforward river geographically speaking, but it's a lot more turbulent than Munsee or Brandewitz, with rapids in some areas that will not hesitate to knock you down. Schwassbergians really love to paddle around in it though, so I guess it's not so bad.

Mountains and Deserts

Rosenkranz Desert is the one and only desert (or prairie area, for that matter) in the Ulmich Region. In real life, Germany doesn't have any deserts - at least not truly, but south of Berlin (or Zergen, in this case) lies a pocket of pseudo-desert area referred to as the Lieberoser Desert. Rosenkranz is based on that pocket, though a lot drier. While not a sand dune type of desert, it's an area more similar to a desertified prairie land.

Norwuste Range is Ulmich's third tallest range. There's not much to write home about other than it being much tamer than Kitzberg or Stahlgrenze. Not to mention drier.

The Kitzberg Mountain Range is Ulmich's second tallest range altogether, and home to the second tallest peak in Ulmich: Mt. Kleinkrieg. The peak's name, meaning "little war," is well deserved, considering how dangerous it can really be to climb. While not as tall as Augureich, it's imposing on its own. Climbers, please perform your due diligence.

The Stahlgrenze Mountains are Ulmich's tallest range, housing Mt. Augureich, the region's highest summit. If Kleinkrieg's a freakshow, then wait till you see Augureich. The thing's surrounded by a nonstop blizzard, and if that wasn't bad enough, it also happens to be an active volcano. You see, unlike Kleinkrieg, there is NO climbing Augureich. Should you ever decide to ignore my warnings and climb the glorified death rock anyway, here's to hoping the monks in the town can give you a blessing or two before you depart. Happy days!

A funky skrunkly little guy

Please excuse my art, I attempted to emulate the Pokemon shading style and it had interesting results 😞

BUNDESAETOS! He's the Legendary Pokemon of the Ulmich Region (I'll elaborate soon dw dw), a silly little fellow if there ever was one.

GENERAL INFORMATION

Species Name: Bundesaetos

"The Governance Pokemon"

Type: Fighting/Flying. (He looks like a Dark/Flying type to be fair, but there are quite a few of those, and Yveltal's taken).

Gender: Bundesaetos is Genderless, but often referred to with he/him and it/its pronouns.

Ability: Morior Invictus - Sp. Atk stat is boosted at the start of a battle.

Base Stats: HP - 120 Atk - 100 Def - 80 Sp. Atk - 160 Sp. Def - 120 Speed - 100 TOTAL: 680

Its signature move is called Chancellor's Decree, a Fighting-type special attack with a base damage of 120 and a PP of 5. Bundesaetos will open its twin-toothed beaks, stretching its wings to their full mast before unleashing a deadly array of blinding beams toward the target. This move has no aftereffects, but definitely ask Arceus if he needs a bandaid.

Bundesaetos' name is derived from the German word Bundesrepublik (federal republic), and Chrysaetos (the latter half of the golden eagle's scientific name).

Bundesaetos itself is drawn from the Bundesadler, or "Federal Eagle," a black eagle that is both Germany's coat of arms and its national animal.

Bundesaetos is known best for being the founder of Ulmich, a Pokemon eager to break away from a controlling and highly religious empire in order to create a new region in its more idealistic image. Because of its roots in what would be a sort of alternate Pokemon version of the Holy Roman Empire, it's very regal looking and quite befitting of a king. Don't get Bundesaetos wrong, though - he's probably an anarchist.

As for his two heads? They represent East and West Germany. The black split in the middle of Bundesaetos is representative of its time in separation. A physical representation of the Berlin Wall, if you will.

There are no analogs for either of the World Wars in Ulmich or Expat's Folly, and subsequently, Kalos and Galar never had any horrendous beef with Ulmich during that whole debacle. Ulmich's history has always been very internal, a governing eagle tore in two by tyrannical politicians against the rest of Ulmich. In its place, two Pokemon would come - the eagles of the East and the West, trying desperately to find each other and unify as Bundesaetos once more.

Think of Ulmich's "evil team" as a more people-centric rendition of Team Plasma, with Ghetsis vying for control over Unova by any means necessary. Ulmich's version of Team Plasma is the Ivory Batallion. The IB is, in essence, a bunch of shitty right-wingers who would commit horrific acts of arson and then say they're the ones being victimized by the "liberal agenda" or something. Bundesaetos does not like them and I don't either.