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toastbutteregg

noahnomore

cannibalchicken

maculategiraffe

me, reaching into my dresser drawer for black pants: I hope this isn’t the pair with big holes worn in the inner thighs

Marie Kondo, gently over my shoulder: why is a pair of pants you find unwearable still in your dresser drawer

me: oh shit that’s right!! The dresser is for clothes that under some circumstance I might conceivably wear!!

Marie Kondo, beaming proudly: Yes, that’s correct!! These pants must have been your favorites. How wonderful that they were so comfortable and practical that you wore them out. But now since they no longer function as pants, you should move them from the drawer where you keep your functioning pants!

me: Yes thanks I got it they’re in the fabric basket now

Marie Kondo, fading back into the darkness: I love what you’ve done with the kitchen!!

cwicseolfor

The notion of KonMari as some creepy semi-embodied but entirely benevolent spirit, like a well-intentioned Bloody Mary, is so perfect and wonderful.

essoreese

Marie Kondo has the same powers but the exact opposite energy of the Duolingo Owl.

strangelyregular

YES.

Marie Kondo: Your room isn’t very clean, but that’s okay, I love mess! Does this spark joy?

Duolingo Owl: I wrote the ransom note in Spanish, and if you have to use Google Translate to read it, your kid gets it. You broke your streak. I’ll break your neck.

ace-pervert

Marie Kondo holding your child, while standing on the remains of the Duolingo Owl : The Bird did not spark joy

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fthgurdy

Re: the last post, the article mentions that some places use clams to test the toxicity of the water. It’s like that in Warsaw- we get our water from the river, and the main water pump has 8 clams that have triggers attached to their shells. If the water gets too toxic, they close, and the triggers shut off the city water supply automatically.

The clams are just better at measuring the water quality than any man-made sensors.

Edit: check out this documentary trailer : https://vimeo.com/408820791

zvaigzdelasas

God Bless Our Troops

looksmokin

They hot glued a spring to a clam and gave it full control over the water supply

sindri42

No of course not, that would be ridiculous.

They hot glued springs to eight clams and gave them collective control over the water supply.

strangetikigod

No of course not, hot glue would kill the clams.

The used silicone adhesive to attach springs to eight clams and gave them collective control over the water supply.

rose pattern

I literally this was going to be a period post until I read the caption.

Worth it though.

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walruspeppermint

wait, huh?? According to Youtube "haha" isn't English and it translates to "lol" ashjfncb

unpunny

Me and my mates are in a band called Duvet.

We’re a cover band.

nerdsthings

I spit out the water in my mouth

yourangelonline

riviere-libre

This still fucking cracks me up

#lol

cannibalchicken

nerdsthings

oh my god i want a cat

#mom please get me a cat

anxi

#this is so apt to the situation im in rn

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

dr-paint

Beware of Crimson Peak

nerdsthings

oh my god so pretty

#wow

unclefather

who are the people commenting on porn? who is saying these things?

huffylemon

It’s the post nut clarity speaking

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