Wildly sarcastic and oddly optimistic

Now EF is SUPER fucking important for ER, but its also important for learning and memory, attention and impulse control, the development of long-term decision making in adolescence, and their social development. It literally changes the anatomy and physiology of your brain and your behavior and it spills over to every aspect of the child's life.

Growing up in houses like this cause a spillover effect in the child's social life and their ability to connect with peers properly, their ability to handle emotional stimuli, their ability to process information. It essentially creates a negative bias that puts the child at a HUGE risk of dealing with psychopathology for the rest of their life.

This is just one of the hundreds of studies I have saved that explains the effects of it, and this just covers general emotion regulation. However there are SO many more nuances when it comes to breaking down the different causes of poor ER in parents like ADHD/ASD, personality pathology, parent-child personality fit, parental trauma, etc. Its very interesting and VERY sad. I grew up in a house like this and I definitely mourn what I could've been if I didn't inherit my dad's never ending irritation lol.

It kills me that people treat children like mini-adults, when they literally need to be taught EVERYTHING. Even in moments where parents don't feel like they're actively teaching, every single thing they do infront of their child is going to teach the child something.

Also I'm totally not bashing parents with mental illness, because I literally work with parents who have their own challenges they work through while helping their child overcome their difficulties. However, I do have a professional degree in psychology, specifically child and adolescent development and caretaking so I'm not coming from a place of un-educated opinionation. I'm not saying poor emotional regulation makes someone a poor parent, but it does contribute to harmful parenting practices even when they aren't conscious!!!!

Self-awareness in parenting is one of the most important things a caretaker can do for their child, simply being able to stop and think "how is my reaction to this going to affect my child" can do fucking WONDERS for your baby's development :)