mr. sunshine

"DNI: freaks" do you realize how conservative you look

freaks please interact

Knocked up my workplace with my 40 hour long week and it gave birth to a beautiful baby paycheck

[steals your baby immediately after his birth][raises him][trains him in the ways of an ancient martial art invented by cormorant fishers in 700 ad for 13 years][enters him in a tournament][he loses in 4 rounds] ok whatever. you can have him back

sometimes i find a fic that could be so good if the author would just like use spellcheck and grammar check one single time and standardize their spelling and every time this happens i feel like i’m a time traveller finding the best basketball player that has ever lived but they are an 8 year old child in mesopotamia. please come with me. please. i can show you the way. you can change the world if you let me show you the way….

@funnier-when-objectum

Rome wasnt built out of hey

hey

Hi is for horses

hi

"it's not a thought crime if you post it because then it's not a thought it's something you said" ouhhhhh my God Can we all just throw ourselves into a river. they're inventing Posting Crimes. you did a Post Crime when you made that silly little kink post. it's only a thought crime if you only think it AND you have to hate yourself for thinking it you have to flagellate every day and be miserable and you have to bathe in boiling hot holy water to absolve yourself and cleanse yourself. you fucking Post Criminal. posting your Thoughts that are Criminal (not a real definable category that matters btw)

can we please talk about how the most miserable people on this website have such a backwards-ass idea of how to deal with intrusive thoughts. like, "it's only an intrusive thought if you perform exactly how disgusted you are by it!!" this is The opposite of what they tell you to do like actually. if you spend all your time wringing your hands over every single bad thought you have that only reinforces it!!!! you need to let it go. it's a thought it cannot hurt you and it isn't what makes you. and you don't need to performatively retch over how despicable the thought may be to an imagined jury. It Doesn't Matter. It's A Thought. Not An Action. And No Simply Saying It Aloud Or Writing It In A Journal Or Posting It To Your Blog Or Writing A Story Doesn't Make It Any More Real Either. Can We Please Stop Being The OCD Reinforcement Website

just received the best text message I’ve ever had. from my mom

i love "bite me" as a retort. your frustrating me, come put your spit and teeth all over me for it. and maybe lick me a little. because i hate you

its loveslop. you only like me because youve formed an emotional bond over time.

Rome wasnt built out of hey

hey