My Midlife Crisis

My current partner has lived on his own for 8 years and the absolute most I have to help him with is maybe sending him $20 so he can make a bill payment on time

After I left, in the first six months I got texts or calls asking me to please tell him:

The online banking password (dude, I left you, you should really change that)

Where I ordered his special-wecial organic underwear

Where the good cutting board was (my dad gave it to us at our wedding, genius, I took it with me along with the rest of the stuff from my family)

What brand butter we bought

What brand of local kielbasa we bought

Who his doctor was

What RMV office had the shortest lines

Where the old tax returns were (in the fucking box labeled tax returns)

The phone number for his best friend

I shit you not.

Then he had a heart attack (mild) and none of his family or friends were around to take him to the hospital. But instead of calling 911, he called me, who by then lived 45 minutes away. He lived 5 minutes from an EMS dispatch location. He called me, despite the fact that he didn’t believe me 8 months prior when I was feeling suicidal and I had to call a cab to go alone to check myself into the hospital for a 72-hour hold. I told him to call 911, hung up on him when he whined about “making a fuss”, called 911, called his siblings and then texted them “your brother is having a heart attack, I called 911 for him, come home,” and washed my hands of it.

“Sephora will start selling entry-level witch kits in October.”

All right witches, listen up.

Sephora is to begin selling a “witch kit” next month featuring a tarot deck, fragrances, a sage bundle, and a rose quartz crystal for $42.

I think it’s wonderful that witchcraft is making a resurgence, but what I don’t think is wonderful, is that a huge corporation like Sephora is trying to tap into this market.

Why don’t I like it?

Because Sephora has their fingers in enough pies and generates over $4 billion in revenue per year.

Because witchcraft produce and supplies should be provided by people with knowledge on the practise(s) and who care enough to make sure their products are ethical, of a high quality, and non-appropriative.

Because Sephora will be stealing business from actual witchcraft and occult centric shops who likely don’t make huge sums of money anyway due to the niche nature of the market.

Because Sephora doesn’t need the fucking money!

So, I urge you to share this post and refrain from purchasing this “entry-level” witch kit (and any future witchcraft related product) from Sephora. Instead, support small, witch-owned businesses. We need you and we’ve got your backs.

practical and simple ways to cleanse and bless your home 🌿

🌿 burn cedar sticks or cedar incense. cedar helps drive away negative influences, energies, and spirits. really good herb to work with when moving into a new space. helps with protection on all levels.

🌿 sprinkle a blend of salt, sage, and mint on the floors to soak up all the negative energies on the ground and vacuum up when you feel it has picked everything up. clean out all that salt from your vaccuun and dispose of it in the trash outside (not in nature)

🌿 diffuse lavender oil. lavender oil is very protective and helps bring serenity and peace into a space.

🌿 manifest abundance and prosperity by meditating with citrine and placing it in your home. place a clear quartz next to it to amplify abundant energies

🌿 make a crystal gird out of selenite, black tourmaline and white jade. these crystals will create a barrier of protection around your house and they will cleanse the hell out of it.

🌿 place pieces of selenite in windowsills, this will purify energy coming in and out of the house. immediately raises the vibration of the room

🌿 when burned, palo santo releases a cleansing smoke filled with healing energies. great for filling spaces with good health and fortune

🌿 ask your spirits/deities to cleanse, protect, and bless your space and leave them offerings when you are done

🌿 sandalwood incense raises vibrations, cleanses, offers psychic protection, and helps to open up psychic awareness

🌿 amethyst is not only a enhances the intuition and increases calm energies, it is also very protective and will shield you from psychic attacks

🌿 work with the elements for protection, meditation and visualization works well

🌿 visualize an impenetrable bubble of protection surrounding your home protecting you from all lower energies

🌿 visualize a waterfall pouring into your space washing away all stagnant and negative energy leaving your space with abundant and healthy energy

🌿 put mint leaves all around your house, in your windowsills, in your shoes, jewelry boxes, altar, etc. to protect you from evil intentions. also good for protecting your home from misfortune

🌿 wind chimes will warn you when a negative spirit is around, there sound will also help drive them off your property

🌿 cinnamon is extremely protective, i love dressing candles with ground cinnamon for cleansing and protection

🌿 burning dragon’s blood incense will create a wall of fire protecting you and your space, also a really good incense for clearing bad spirits

🌿 sleep with a lavender sachet underneath your pillow to protect you from psychic vampires

🌿 labradorite protects you and your home from demons