Just a depressed teen trying to make it through the day

I hate being the youngest in my family

Youngest on my dads side

Second youngest on my mums (not including my cousins children)

Like whenever anyone brings up anything about children or age someone says "you were lucky to be born" Great for my mental health

Youngest of 4 "three is the perfect number of children"

Also everyone are adults (except people two of which are 17 this year)

People say being the youngest is the best but I'm in a completely different generation to everyone else (sort of)

My sister is 6 years older than me so we don't really talk that much (the most conversation we've had all week is "can I have a piece of chocolate"

I haven't seen or really talked to my other sister is three months

I haven't talked to my brother all week

Don't talk to any of my cousins expect one

2 of my grandparents are dead and I haven't seen the other 2 in 2 years (i am seeing them in 2 days though)

My parents are probably going to retire after I finish high school and I barely talk to them even though their room is right next to mine

I have to be a lot more independent than my siblings were when they were my age (I catch the bus every day they use to be driven and get shouted at if I miss it, I make my own dinner and feel extremely guilty if I don't and my parents still make my siblings dinner, when my siblings were my age they were making movies with us and always playing board games with us, I have to take myself to some appointments and they still take my siblings, started making my own breakfast at 5 whilst my older sister was my age)

My parents are over parenting

I am in charge of the dog

My parents leave me in charge of random stuff (had to book the accommodation for the holiday)

At the same time no-one ever trust me with anything

All of my problems are irrelevant because my siblings are older and their problems are more complex (BTW I have anxiety, depression and ED I struggle with SH, the hospital (I was in the hospital for SH almost died it's fine) said that I probably have OCD, and was in the middle of getting diagnosed with Autism and possibly also ADHD (my parents decided it was too expensive) yeah so my mental health is fucked)

Also I'm openly queer to my family somehow the first kid in my family to be in a relationship and I'm openly non-binary (and if I try and correct anyone especially my mother they shout at me) no-one uses my prefered pronouns

Also we don't have enough rooms in our house for 4 kids so I have been kick out of My parents room my brothers room and both of my sisters rooms and sometimes end up sleeping of the lounge or under a table cause I haven't got a room

I have always hated eating and recently developed and eating disorder