if you're going through hell, keep going

Shit used to be wild, and this is just what I could find that had decent sources, I've heard a lot more horror stories.

For years, the country’s rich and famous have used a little-known Federal Aviation Administration program to shield their private jets’ flight records from public view — among them Taylor Swift, Oprah Winfrey, and Steven Spielberg. Now this decades-old program has a new client: Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), the agency carrying out Trump’s mass deportations. To obscure its planes, which ship immigrants out of the country on deportation flights, ICE is taking advantage of a longstanding program created by the private jet lobby, The Lever can confirm. For years, the scheme has allowed celebrities and Wall Street CEOs to partially block their flight data from public view. Its use by the Trump administration’s immigration enforcers is part of a mounting effort by ICE and its contracted private charter airlines to keep the planes’ flight paths hidden from the public. CNN first reported on the trend, noting that ICE’s charter airlines were requesting some of the planes in their fleets be scrubbed from public flight tracking sites. Deportation flights — like Swift’s private jet, whose enormous carbon footprint has stoked public outcry — can still be tracked in real time using other public data. But ICE’s use of the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA)’s private jet blacklist underscores how a growing push for privacy by the corporate jet lobby is being deployed to limit public oversight of ICE’s draconian immigration crackdown.

The restaurant server forgot your order so now you won't have time to eat before the end of your lunch break? That's inconvenient and frustrating, but doesn't call for slamming your fist on the table or other displays of physical aggression. Find a different way to problem solve.

Your roommate forgot to do the dishes again so now you don't have clean dishes to eat a meal after working a double shift? Again that is frustrating and inconvenient, but certainly doesn't call for slamming doors or other displays of physical aggression. Find a different way to problem solve.

First of all, you never know who has PTSD, and PTSD is far more common than you might think. Even if you think you know someone very well you can never know if there's a part of their past they never share with anyone.

Second of all, the reason that as a society we are trying to move away from physical violence as a method of problem solving is that physical violence for problem solving is inherently unequal. It adds to the marginalization and oppression of disabled people, elderly people, children, people just naturally smaller in stature and frame, survivors of domestic violence, and anyone else who is at a disadvantage in physical altercations. This includes displays of physical aggression, like punching a wall, slamming your fist, raising your voice, or slamming doors.

If you're someone naturally smaller in frame and stature, or a child, or elderly, or physically disabled, and someone larger and more physically fit than you is doing displays of aggression such as shouting or slamming doors, it can be very frightening and possibly trigger a panic attack especially if you have PTSD.

But regardless of someone's size and physical capabilities, it's always possible to bring up traumatic memories that trigger a panic attack if you resort to physical displays of aggression, making it never okay.

Unless someone is genuinely making you feel unsafe, such as someone stalking or harassing you or potentially about to attack you, then you have absolutely nothing worthwhile to gain from making someone intimidated/afraid.

Personally I think it's pretty unfair to compare slamming doors to "you mustn't make any loud noise ever in case you traumatize someone". I am a survivor of domestic violence, and my abuser would slam doors while in a rampage. A lot of people I know who have survived domestic violence have said the same. My abuser, like many other abusers, would slam doors for the same reason he would punch or kick the wall, to let me know he was angry enough to use force and wanting to intimidate me. My case is not unique, again, i know many survivors of domestic violence who said door slamming was used to intimidate them, for their abuser to show off how angry they are.

I also think slamming a door is really different than punching or screaming into a pillow. Behind a closed door no one can hear or see you punching a pillow. But a slammed door is something the whole building can hear and feel. It's not a private action the way punching or screaming into a pillow is. And that's exactly why it's something so many abusers opt for, they want everyone in the house to hear the slam and feel the walls shaking, they want everyone in the house to know how angry they are, and to see and hear the physical force of their rage.

Years ago when I was still working food service a woman threw a tantrum at me because the kitchen got her order wrong, and when she stormed out of the building she slammed the door so hard that all the walls shook (it was an old wooden building in the historical downtown district of Reykjavík, not one of the newer concrete buildings). After that I had to dismiss myself down to the staff room to recover because it made me shake uncontrollably, since as mentioned, slamming doors is something my abuser would do when he would go into a rampage.

"but slamming a door is a way of expressing anger that's very much NOT directed at anyone in particular" you could say the same thing about punching the wall. Punching the wall is directed at the wall, not a human being, but punching the wall during a fight or conflict is still widely recognized as common behavior in abusers. Because even if the physical force is directed at an inanimate object, when done during an argument or conflict people (especially with abusive tendencies) will direct physical force at an inanimate object in front of whoever they're quarreling with as a way to try to scare / intimidate them. Slamming doors isn't an uncommon method of trying to scare or intimidate someone during a conflict. Good for you if you've never encountered this, but your experiences aren't universal.