so much love for you already

(does one thing) hm i think i deserve a little reward :) (walks around in circles listening to music for three hours)

All I do is act incorrectly in response to stimuli

oh no. i’m not falling for that one again. last time we had “just a little bit of fun” i ended up trapped in your magic labyrinth.

why must life have a grand purpose? is it not enough to have some basil, and mozzarella?

why do rich people always start crying when people say they’re rich or are critical of their privilege and say “my parents work REALLY hard, my parents work SO hard for everything we have” like bitch do you think… poor people.. don’t work hard lmao? you think your parents are the first people to work hard?

when hozier said "i should've worshipped her sooner" and when hozier said "i'll crawl home to her" and when hozier said "your love is sunlight" and when hozier said "yeah girl ahahaha"

we drink boba tea to satisfy our ancient & innate urge to slurp up tadpoles from a puddle through a reed

no we absolutely do not

i went through an entire character arc during quarantine

i became more evil if you’re curious

Yes I AM cranky because I received NO PROPHETIC DREAMS to help me on my quest.

This truly is my annoying diary that you're all forced to read

heard some guy in barnes and noble today say “i can’t stand adult fiction they’re all like ‘i’m getting a divorce’” 

i think i’ll continue to wear a mask when this shit’s all over, and huge sunglasses. my face is none of your business

asking my employees if they want to “go outside and play”

👀👉👈