(co-written with my dear friend Dani ā„)
ātaeminniiiiiiiiiiiiiieā
āwhen will you be home? =3= i miss you so much.ā
āIām on my way. Iāll be here in half an hour.ā
āIām sorry Nini, should I drive as fast as possible?ā
ānoooo!! you must drive safely & come back to me in one piece!ā
āBe patient, Iāll be there soon. And I canāt talk anymore. Iām in the car.ā
āi canāt wait. i made chicken!!ā
āOrdering chicken isnātĀ āmakingā chicken, Jongin-ah...ā
āshut up, drive, & stop teasing me. get your ass back to me.ā
Taemin is laughing out loud in his car. He puts his phone away & leaves the parking lot to drive to their apartment.
Itās bigger than the one he used to share with Jinki, back in the days. Taemin likes it even more because they chose it together, decorated it together & most importantly, live there together. Taemin still feels overwhelmed with warmth every day when he comes home to the place he shares with Jongin & their dogs. When Jongin is there to welcome him & hold him close, itās even better. But even when Jongin is away, for concerts, galas, or other work responsibilities, Taemin still likes to push the door open & see Jonginās shoes in the entrance. He likes seeing Jonginās mug in the kitchen sink. He likes laying on Jonginās side of their bed.
It took them a while to be able to move in together. Taemin remembers how careful Jongin was at first... how nervous he was when he first told his fans that Taemin was his friend⦠how they had spent countless nights sharing their fears and comforting each other.
āso, itās tomorrow.ā
āYes, Jongin, I know,ā Taemin tries to keep the anxiety out of his voice. No matter how many times he has reassured Jongin that everything will be fine, he canāt help but feel nervous about tomorrowās announcement.
āhow long do you think it will take them to recognize you?ā
āI donāt know. For those who follow me too, maybe an hourā¦ā
āare you sure youāre okay with that? once they know who you are, we can never take it back.ā Though he tries to sound casual, Taemin can tell that this worries Jongin more than anything else, but he knows, even if Jongin doesnāt, that he will never regret this decision. He turns around in Jonginās arms and brushes his fingers against the otherās cheek until his boyfriend meets his gaze. He holds it for a long moment before putting as much conviction into his voice as he possibly can.
āYes, Nini. Iām sure.ā
They took baby steps after that, each carefully planned by Jongin. They never came out publicly, but Taemin is practically certain that most of Jonginās fans have figured things out. Jongin always says that Taemin is a friend, a very close friend, his very best friend, but Taemin knows that theyāve been reckless in public more than once.
āWhat are you going to do?ā
ānothing,ā Jongin answers calmly. āif someone asks, iāll tell them weāre friends, just as i always have.ā
āWe donāt look like friends.ā Taemin gestures to the picture lying in front of them, a clear photo of them locked in a tight embrace.
āfriends hug. i hug my members all the time & no one says anything. well, they do, but no one takes them seriously. the same will happen with us.ā Jongin sounds more confident than he feels, but he knows that Taemin isnāt used to the press like he is & he doesnāt want him to worry. Itās not as though they can take it back so the best thing to do now is continue denying the rumors until the reporters get bored and leave them alone.
And they did. Eventually. Sometimes Taemin gets tired of being careful, of making sure never to kiss Jongin in public, but he knows itās for the best. He also knows better than to complain about it to his boyfriend because no matter how reassuring he tries to be, Jongin still worries sometimes.
āthey know, you knowā¦most of them, at leastā
āOf course they know, Nini. Theyāre not stupid.ā Taemin sighs as he prepares to repeat a conversation that he swears theyāve had a thousand times.
āmaybe we should just tell them.ā
āJonginnie. You know we canāt. It wouldnāt just affect you. Think of your members.ā
āi know,ā Jongin sighs in frustration. āi just feel like such a liar sometimes.ā
āHey,ā Taemin keeps his voice soft as he runs his fingers through Jonginās hair. āItās not like you hide me completely... & you know itās easier this way. You donāt have to worry about it hurting your career or your dreams, & we get to be us.ā
Jongin smiles at those words but keeps his eyes on their intertwined fingers. āitās not fair to you thoughā¦ā
And Taemin knows that this is what heās really worried about. He knows that his opinion matters more to Jongin than anyone elseās. He turns Jonginās head gently towards his to make sure that his boyfriend knows that he means what heās about to say.
āI am perfectly fine with the way things are, Nini. Do I wish that I could touch you and kiss you in public? Sure. Do I wish that we could be open and not have to worry about being accepted? Of course I do. But this is the way things are right now, & Iām okay with that. I would rather have this life that I live with you, secrets and all, than have our relationship be the thing that takes away your dream. I love you. And as long as weāre together, Iām happy.ā
Jongin trembles a little as he tries to hold back the tears threatening to escape his eyelids. He wants so badly to respond, but he doesnāt know what to say so he pulls Taemin closer and presses their lips together with as much passion as he possesses, hoping that itās enough.
Taemin smiles to himself as he gets off at the right exit, bringing him closer to the home he shares with Jongin. Having already let his mind wander to memories of their relationship, he canāt help but think about when they first moved in together, smiling again when he remembers the first time Jongin saw his office.
A soft knock at the door brings Taeminās attention to the man standing in the doorway with a mischievous grin on his face.
ālooks like someone has a favoriteā¦ā Jongin smirks as his eyes scan over the multitude of things with his face on them currently set around the room (he doesnāt yet realize that his boyfriend has another box to unpack). Taemin blushes a deep red and looks down at the Jongin poster he had been about to hang up.
āLike you didnāt already know,ā he mutters without looking up.
āmhmm,ā Jongin agrees, ābut i like to be reminded.ā His smile is more genuine now as he enters the room fully. āwait, isnāt this from this year?ā he asks, holding up a piece of merch from the newest line.
āI canāt help it.ā Taemin pouts as his blush deepens, but his boyfriend just giggles.
āahhh, youāre so cute, taeminnie! the fans will love it when i make the apartment tour!ā
āYah! Iām not leaving this stuff up when you show your fans our place! We donāt want them thinking your āroommateā is a creep.ā
Jongin just laughs, thinking about how happy he is. Finally, he gets to live with Taemin. Heāll get to see him more and take care of him better. Everything is working out for them. He was a little worried that Taemin would be annoyed at pretending that they were just roommates, but heās been nothing but understanding, even borrowing Jinkiās spare bed to put up for the video everyone said they had to make. Minseok did it when he left the dorm so now itās Jonginās turn.
āDo you think anyone believes that we're actually just roommates?ā Taeminās teasing voice pulls Jongin from his thoughts. Heās long since stopped worrying about scandals, but he also knows how obvious they sometimes are.
āof course not,ā Jongin scoffs. ābut it doesnāt matter. at least things stay under control this way.ā
Taemin hums in agreement as he feels strong arms wrap around his waist. He tilts his head up to look his boyfriend in the eyes and smiles contentedly. Heās happy to be home.
As soon as Taemin gets home, Jongin has to fight their dogs to get to his boyfriend. But he likes it. They kiss & hug & Taemin showers while Jongin gets the chicken & prepares everything for a movie night. They end up snuggling together on their couch, talking about their days through half of the first movie.
Then Jongin hands Taemin an envelope. Heās smiling like a kid & Taemin raises one eyebrow.
āWhatās this about?ā
Taemin opens the envelope to find two concert tickets & he grins & then kisses Jongin.
āYESSS!!! Damn, I feel like the last tour was forever ago!!ā
āit was just last year...ā
āIt felt like forever anyway. I donāt need your opinion,Ā Jonghyunās going to agree with me.ā
Jongin laughs loudly & Taemin shifts closer to him.
āIs there any news about your next solo album? Iāve also been waiting forever for thaaaat~ā
Taemin freezes & suddenly pushes Jongin away to look at him with wide eyes.
Jongin stays silent & wiggles his eyebrows & Taemin looks offended.
āTell me! Tell me everything! Right now!ā
Jongin laughs loudly & gets up to take their dirty dishes to the kitchen. Theyāve both completely forgotten that the movie is still playing.
āi canāt, itās a secret~~~ā
āIf itās a secret, then that means itās happening, right? FUCKING FINALLY! Thereās something to be secretive about!ā
āJonginnie! Stop teasing me!ā Taemin yells & follows Jongin to the kitchen.Ā āLast time I asked, you said your solo comeback wasnāt happening yet... so if you say itās a secret now, then you know SOMETHING!ā
Taemin presses himself against Jonginās back, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist, & presses his face to his boyfriendās shoulder blade & starts whining.
āNini, Iām your sweet, lovely boyfriend. IĀ deserveĀ to know! Tell me everything!! What do we know already?ā
āwe know that itās confidential & even taeminnie canāt have any information!ā Jongin teases with a snort.
āOh my god, itās really happening!ā
Jongin chuckles & turns around to bump Taeminās nose.
āi really canāt say anything.ā
His voice is soft this time & Taemin tilts his head with a small smile that looks cute at first but turns mischievous very quickly.
āWe both know Iām going to get you to tell me everything. I have ways. You know it; I know it; everyone at SM knows it.ā
āyeah, iām counting on that...ā Jongin whispers against Taeminās lips.
He kisses him quickly & breaks their hug to turn and walk back to the living room, humming a soft melody that Taemin doesnāt recognize. Taemin quickly follows, his eyes shining with intent at all the evil thoughts forming in his mind.