one of my favourite things about the sochi au is that 100% they both think that they have trapped the other person. they are both absolutely convinced for a While that, given the chance, the other person would NOT be doing this, like "he would be better with Literally Anyone Else, oh no i am such a terrible awful person for shackling this man to me and for secretly kind of enjoying that he is shackled to me because i like him, which makes me even worse!!!!"
also if jj and hayden are in Crisis, how are the bears taking it? because personally i'm imagining marlow tweeting about "oh hell yeah brother this makes so much sense!!! of course your montreal jane is hollander!" because his boy deserves only the best. his tweets about this and how the best is obviously Hockey Superstar And Noted Model, Shane Hollander go viral.
In the immediate aftermath of this, the Boston Raiders try to I Am Spartacus their boyâs sexuality. It goes. Poorly.
Fundamentally, the issue is that they just get in front of a camera and let Cliff Marleau speak for them without first planning what theyâre going to say.
The thing is, they are made immediately aware of the fact that Ilya Rozanov being gay in Russia endangers #theirboyâs continued existence and also his ability to return to their muscular embrace. They cannot abide by this. Free their man.
They decide to take the hard stance that Ilya Rozanov is NOT gay. They are aware that there is video proof that he shoved Shane Hollander against a wall and then also his tongue down Shane Hollanderâs throat. It was NOT in a gay kind of way. How. How could that not be in a gay kind of way. Well. You see. Thatâs because it was Shane Hollander. It is NOT gay if itâs for Shane Hollander. You DO NOT have to be gay to be down for Shane Hollander. That is still a totally straight experience. Theyâve all thought about it. All of them. Isnât. Isnât that right boys?
The Boston Raiders feel this is a large demand to ask of their brotherhood but are willing to commit nevertheless. They. They sure have thought of that. All. All of them. Theyâve all thought about shoving Shane Hollander against the wall and kissing him with tongue. And thatâs a normal, straight person experience. The whole NHL thinks that, even.
If, if anything, itâs their fault the kiss happened. Because Ilya does not want to kiss Shane Hollander. He wants to kiss Shane Hollander the least out of all of them, because. Rivals. But he, he was obviously drunk as shit when this happened, and theyâve. Talked.
They. They totally talk about wanting to take Shane Hollander manfully against a wall to and around Ilya. They do that all the time. And Ilya is not into it. Because he is straight and. Rivalry. They, the Boston Raiders, they just. Talked about wanting to kiss and. Do other things. To Shane Hollander so, so much around Ilya that it. It just totally confused his drunken mind. Maybe one of them even dared him to do it. Carmichael thinks that maybe. Maybe he can remember daring him to do that.
Anyway uh. If thereâs anyone whoâs gay for Shane Hollander, itâs, itâs them, and not Ilya Rozanov, who is 100% straight. So uh. Shane Hollander if youâre ever, ever thinking about exploring some things about yourself, maybe. Give the Boston Raiders a call. Theyâre. Theyâre ready for you, stallion. But uh. Not Ilya Rozanov. Because he is straight.
This does not fucking help quell the international attention suddenly focused on them. It does not fucking do that at all. The Boston Raiders announcing that Shane Hollander is a source of shared and lustful fixation for the entire team bar Ilya Rozanov, who is straight, is televised in more than 30 countries.
Shane and Ilya see this several hours after it happens when theyâve fully committed to the narrative that theyâre in gay love with each other and have finally managed to battle their way into the Canadian embassy. And itâs just.
Shane: *face buried in his own hands*
Ilya: those fucking idiots
And yessss, thatâs the entire dynamic that underpins the agony of this fic. They both feel like theyâve trapped the other. They both want a relationship and they feel so, so guilty about that fact because the other person doesnât actually was them, theyâre just trapped with no other options because of what the other did. Ilya feels the guilt of being the person whose benefit this was for. Shane feels the guilt of the person who actually committed them to this narrative. And they both think the other would rather be with anyone else. Itâs agony.