An Aimless Dominion

i bet count von count has killer fuckin music taste

what if you combined a pressure cooker and a deep fryer and made a pressure fryer, the most dangerous kitchen implement in history

does this imply you want to heat cooking oil to past its boiling point at one atmosphere

*grabs america by the shoulders* we have got to lock the fuck in. south asia and the middle east are running goddamn circles around us. we have got to come up with a more dangerous way of cooking food now or we can kiss these quarter finals goodbye

good morning. something needs to change

Horror fans.

asking "hey is it fine if I smoke in here" and before you're able to answer I've already set up a full rack of salmon over a fire in your living room

You watch old cartoons for your entire life and you think vegetables getting pulled underground in front of some farmer is just some exaggerated thing they made up...

She's looking out for you. Don't kill yourself for a company that defines you as an asset

You’re an elderly superhero. You have to save the day one more time before you become eligible for the Senior Heroes Benefit Scheme. Unfortunately, the only supervillain available is your grandchild.