Universe Marmalade

gar field? that’s not where they’re supposed to be

oh wow… how serene…

good morning to the beaten and the damned only

I’m gonna propose “I guess you haven’t read the silmarillion then :/” as a default response to anyone not understanding a reference to something obscure. even if it’s not remotely Tolkien related. I want to build up a perception that perhaps the sum total of human knowledge is contained in the silmarillion

Ragebaiting my fat dog? More like master baiting my fat hog!!!!!!!!

hey so um this is the coolest shit i've ever seen

the lesbian computer from portal was right. given the circumstances ive been shockingly nice

Hey, I've worked at multiple grocery stores over the years, and these pizzas are no longer safe for human consumption. This frost means the freezer has been turned on and off and on and off a bunch of times, melting and thawing and refreezing over and over. Don't buy food covered in thick frost.

#these pizzas lost their lives in the arctic

i promise you the ingredients of those frozen pizzas are more damaging to your health than whatever minimal amount of bacteria managed to grow in between fridge outages

why are you catholic

why are you pro mold and catholic

Do not trust people like me. I will take you to anime conventions, and the manga section of the library, and Hot Topic, and kiss you in every sugoi place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like stale pocky in your mouth. Watashi will destroy you in the most kawaii way possible. And when I leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people desu

not now honey, mommy’s yearning for something that once was and will never be again

same but for me it's ben and jerry's willy nelson peach cobbler