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maudelebowski29

the-memedaddy

Me📷irl

mixedican-deactivated20190330

glumshoe

I like haunted houses in theory BUT I have no idea how to react when the actors speak to you. They ask me a question and I just… answer it…

The scariest part of a haunted house is the unscripted social interaction.

glumshoe

Scary nurse in a creepy voice: “Do you have an appointment to see the doctor?”

Me: “Uh. Do you accept walk-ins?”

glumshoe

Scary farmer: “I like to kill people!”

My friend, brightly: “I like to die!”

puerto-nic0

Zombie : “AARRRGH”

Me : “Do you get dental insurance?”

Zombie : “TEETH!!”

schmergo

This happened to me.

Scary prison dude: HELLO

Me: Nice to meet you!

Him: (pause) No it’s noooooot

batsalmighty

My worst horror house experience was when I couldn’t find the (rather obvious) exit and the guy chasing me with a chainsaw stopped, sighed and pointed me to the exit, saying “please scream as loud as you can when you run out there” and just left. I disappointed the horror house chainsaw dude and I will never get over that

tired-wolfe

Guy: They are all my friends.. (motioning to hanging corpses; then grabs a noose) Will you be my friend? Me: Sure totally, you made me a friendship necklace? Oh my god your so sweet? Guy: … Yes.. Please, let me.. I cant I cant just go (laughing). – Got to walk a second time through– Same guy: My friends -wailing- Me: I came back I just really wanted to be friends so bad Guy: (laughing more) Please, Im not allowed to laugh.

hoardofhyperfixations

I went to a Haunted House and literally befriended every actor there.

Specifically, I remember;

There were zombies walking around in the waiting room. I said “Hi!” and he gave me a high five. Every time he passed from then on, I got a high five.

Near the end, there were these twin little girls. “Come play with us.” They said. “Okay!” I said. “Forever.” They said. “Oh, sorry, can’t do that. I’m busy.”

I could hear them giggling.

imanicepersoniswear

Guy playing Freddie Kruger: Remember, you are all my children!

Me: thanks dad

A small chorus of teenagers: thanks dad

space-snake

I went to a haunted house once and ended up recognizing a guy from school as one of the actors

Me, brightly: hi Kenneth!

Kenneth: shh!

sixpenceee

Giant animatronic dinosaur outside BBC headquarters 🦕

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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manwaifu

underthepalmsweare-deactivated2

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celebrityho

How peaceful is this? Little finches enjoying the water last night’s rain brought

sicklizardman

Pokemon & Darkest Dungeon starters.

brujite-de-gulubu

@brainfondue

freshest-memes

Roman emperor in a lower temperature

unlimited-nice-works

Nero below zero

thebigiron-official

Caesar in the freezer

ranilla-bean

dictator in the refrigerator

foul pest in the ice chest

old in the cold

genocide in the freezer’s insides

ernest-shackleton

PIECE OF SHIT IN THE COLD PIT

endermaz

is this a brooklyn 99 cold open

paradisiak

Reno 911 was the epitome of comedy

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

I’m making bread

bread boys

my sons!

THEY’RE DELICIOUS

tealfruit

frog bread was tagged explicit. reblog the forbidden frog bread for luck and power

thehuglife

This is my new favorite non threatening threat

charlesoberonn

The Kirby Cycle

There is only one step

And it is Kirby

tryingtofeelsomething

joey-wheeler-official

i swear to god if i had seen shitty car mods daily as the source i would have killed a man

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

obesitysherpa

Never has a meme so accurately depicted my career as a marketer. Seriously, don’t go into marketing. The people you work for just suck the life out of you

marisatomay

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