Misadventures with INTJs

ENFJ: Yelling “hello?” when you hear a noise

ENFP: Dying immediately after having sex

ENTJ: Fat person, black person, or woman is the first to die

ENTP: Protagonist turns out to be the killer

ESFJ: Anyone under age 23 is a complete imbecile

ESFP: Creepy smiles (bonus points for extra/sharp teeth)

ESTJ: Diet pills are actually parasite eggs

ESTP: Pet gets killed as a warning/just to upset people

INFJ: “There was something… off… like it was unnatural…”

INFP: Killer writes message in blood

INTJ: “Now that you’ve read/watched this you will die”

INTP: Cops can’t do anything because there’s not enough information/no one is in immediate danger, if they do end up acting on it they just die

ISFJ: Setting you up for a jump scare but then it turns out to be something harmless (or is it?)

ISFP: Exposition Expert/Priest who knows everything about every spirit ever

ISTJ: “Then I blacked out”

I am very smart and driven towards my goals no matter what (which is why I haven’t lifted a fucking finger towards learning the most basic forms of human communication, instead expecting people to read my mind so they will leave me alone)

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, you stupid sensors (which is why I never learn how to communicate and keep expecting people to read my mind even though it keeps failing)

I’m not like *~other girls~* #intj female

aesthetic post: black and white chess pieces and marble statues and an expensive suit and a desaturated picture of a building

never hide or apologize for who you are

I demand everyone who has made small talk apologize for who they are

I don’t want to know what’s up. Tell me your deepest secrets

YOU’RE ALL IDIOTS WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND

why won’t anyone tell me their deepest secrets #intj problems

I am the only person who dislikes last minute schedule changes #introvert problems

WHY DOES NO ONE BELIEVE WE HAVE EMOTIONS. I feel so deeply #tert fi problems

I have no emotions and I hate people who do: a post about stupid people

OH, YOU’RE AN EXTROVERTED FEELER? TELL ME MORE ABOUT WHATEVER STUPID SHIT

i was informed an ENFP was supposed to find me and love me unconditionally, why has this not happened

First, plan. Then execute. We are the visionaries who create a new world.

WHY INTJs ARE LIKE CATS: we sleep 22 hours a day and spend the other 2 in bed getting lost in our gigantic minds

aesthetic post: slytherin but like, goth

Destroy the stereotype that:

introverts are smart/extroverts are dumb

introverts are sad/extroverts are happy

extroverts have more friends

introverts don’t want friends

extroverts are more common 

introversion is something to be “fixed”

extroverts like being around people more than introverts/introverts like being alone more than extroverts

if you’re shy you’re an introvert and if you’re an introvert you’re shy

extroverts don’t get drained from social situations

introverts don’t get bored of being alone

introversion = anxiety/extroversion = confidence

Running an MBTI blog, you end up finding many different people who are of the same type. Here’s some of the types of INTJs I’ve encountered:

The Mistyped One: Tries their hardest to seem like an INTJ. Probably the ones who say really stereotypical stuff like “I have no emotions,” or, “What is empathy?” By far the most annoying one on this list.

The Surprisingly Kind One: Weirdly nice. Masters of Fi. Probably a Hufflepuff. Just wants to do their best. The rarest type of INTJ.

The Ambitious One: Goal oriented as all hell. Don’t even try getting between them and their goal, or that’ll be the last thing you ever do. Slytherin.

The Sorta Psychopathic One: The reason behind most of the INTJ stereotypes. Probably more harmless than they seem, but still fantasises about murder here and there.

The Nerd™️: Enjoys knowledge for its own sake. Has one area in which they are really good at. Probably hasn’t seen the light of day in years. Ravenclaw.

The Tired Sarcastic One: Lives on coffee and/or energy drinks. Speaks sarcasm as their first language. Don’t even try to hide the fact they’re a bit of an asshole, but that’s what makes them special.

The Artistic One: Either a writer, musician, artist, or a mixture of the three. Creative as hell. Can seem sentimental on paper, but in real life? Don’t even try…

INFJ: Woke up first and is sitting on the couch, sipping coffee/tea

ENFJ: Is making pancakes for everyone 

INFP: *has been awake since 6 am* la la la, oh good morning Songbird *the singing begins*

ENFP: Just kind of *flops* out of bed

ISFJ: Has 47 alarms set just in case, but they always wake up to the first

ESFJ: Sends “good morning” texts to all their friends

ISFP:  *suddenly jerks awake* I SMELL PANCAKES

ESFP: Chucks alarm clock out the window as soon as it goes off

INTJ: *hears INFP and their bird chorus* WhAtEVER is MaKINg ThOse awFUL NOISES will DIE

ENTJ: Has already started their morning “get ready” routine

ISTP: Is running late and rushed out the door with messy hair and something caffeinated in hand

ESTP: Decides to wake everyone else up with an air horn

ISTJ:  Got up at 5am to do that one important thing they had to do

ESTJ: Already has their day, and everyone else’s day planned 

INTP: Is 500% dead inside

1. it’s a pretty good post