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we need another conventionally attractive young man who is chronically weird online to commit a second publicly acclaimed politically motivated assassination so that we can finally achieve what until now was previously believed impossible: ethical true crime yaoi rpf
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The older generation's fixation on forcing you to have kids is something they absolutely refuse to unlearn. You can give the calmest and most reasonable explanation for not having kids and the only thing they can think to say is, "But what of the heir to the lands?" "Who will inherit the throne?" "Please sire upon your barren death there will be a parochial schism that will soak our soils with brother-blood." They literally hate to see you happy with just a cat.
When I was in kindergarten I saw a painting of the American Revolutionary War. I asked my mom, “Who were the good guys and who were the bad guys?” And she said, “That’s not really how war works. It’s not like a TV show. Both sides thought they were right, otherwise they wouldn’t have been fighting.” And my seven year old ass went “Oh ok”
Anyway having internalized that fun fact in literally kindergarten? It surprises me how many college-educated adults still don’t seem to know about it.
OP your mum is correct but also you realise this was literally about the American Civil War where there very much was a good guys and bad guys side?
Like I appreciate the sentiment but it's one of the few wars where you can very easily pick the side that was validated by history.
It says American Revolutionary War
It’s so crazy how much landlords bitch about their job like I swear to God they act like they’re martyrs. Veterinarians don’t complain about their job in nearly the same way and they have one of the highest suicide rates and have to put down pets for a living. If you don’t like dealing with those filthy nasty poors living in YOUR property, you don’t have to be a landlord. It’s not one of those jobs where there’s a huge educational investment that makes finding a new job difficult, you didn’t spent 8 years in landlord school, you can sell your properties at any fucking time to another greedy rich fuck. You don’t have to log on to bitch about an ‘ungrateful’ single mom paying $2k a month to rent your shitty roach infested hovel having a 5 year old that draws on the wall. You could, you know, get a different job. Or kill yourself.
You know how we joke about the array being like a group chat or social media? Well imagine if prayers went into a sort of heavenly email inbox. And when Xie Lian ascends for the third time, he expects his to be empty aside from the occasional spam from someone trying to schmooze up to every god they can think of, or the sadder chain emails from people desperate for help from anywhere.
Instead, he opens it and finds thousands upon thousands of prayers dating back throughout the entirety of his banishment, all from the same untraceable source. He opens random ones. Some are sweet little things, "Your Highness, wherever you are tonight, I hope you sleep well."
Others are more complex, "Your Highness, I find myself in a position where I must either seize power myself or risk it falling into other, more wicked hands. My own hands will inevitably be dirtied by wielding that power, but would they not be just as tainted if I did nothing, and let worse things happen? I know what I will choose, but I still wonder what you would do in my place."
Others still make him blush tomato red up to the tops of his ears, trailing babble still imbued with frantic eroticism and clearly never meant to actually reach him, cutting in and out like a poorly tuned radio as the devotee tries to keep thoughts from becoming prayers, panted strings of "Your Highness, Your Highness, please please please..."
The prayers date back to a few years after his second banishment, which makes sense because his inbox had been wiped when he was banished. He's surprised it's been allowed to gather all of this since: he supposes it's just that no one has even thought to notice. The centuries the prayers span makes it clear they do not come from a human, which is confusing and intriguing in equal measure.
And then, early on, he finds one that makes his heart stop and then take off again at a gallop.
"None of them are quite right, Your Highness. If I carve a thousand, ten thousand, will I eventually get it right? Will I ever be able to capture the kindness and the ferocity you radiate in something as base and cold as stone? I'll keep trying forever, or until I can see you again in the flesh. Your Highness has a believer here who still offers worship."
And that is how Xie Lian realizes that Wu Ming still exists.
(Insert long canon-divergent AU I'm too lazy to write here. I think there needs to be some kooky misunderstandings. Xie Lian is now aware that Wu Ming is out there and loves him and is looking for him and is so distracted by his determination to find him that it takes him 600k words of stubbornly denying his growing affection for Hua Cheng before he finally realizes Hua Cheng IS Wu Ming and has been desperately trying to court him for several volumes.)
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Xie lian can be such a little shit and im am SO here for it!
Behold my rendition of this scene
Yes, it's funny that Hua Cheng calls his house Paradise Manor, which sounds like a brothel.
But consider, Xie Lian's notable phrase was "body in abyss, heart in paradise"
He's literally built a house for his love
Book One San Lang is so funny. He put his whole ghostussy into his human disguise -- every palm line and fingerprint in place, every strand of hair perfect -- but then he's just so blatantly Weird™. Like sure this teenage nepo baby wandering around on a whim because he was fighting with his parents will definitely take all of this Scary Supernatural Stuff in stride with no more than a very transparently flirtatious "I'm sca-wed gege. 🥺" Sure, he definitely just has casual encyclopedic knowledge of gods and defunct kingdoms going back almost a millennium and featuring details that aren't available on Wuxiapedia, and he can read dead languages. Of course he exhibits random carpentry skills. He stabs a guy with a chopstick and then shrugs when he deflates like a skin balloon. He cheerfully ties venomous snakes into knots and very evidently explodes them with his mind. Just Normal Human Kid things!
Ive seen a number of posts lately about how Xie Lian is internally harsh and everyone is protected from his judgement purely bc xl is so polite, and its really making me want to write a one shot where like for 24 hours he's cursed to speak his mind no filter. Like the movie Liar Liar. And everyone just gets their shit wrecked for a full day except Hua Cheng who gets incredibly validated by all the compliments lmao.
Even better if theyre ALL CURSED. Omg.
If its been done someone point me to the fic.
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Xie Lian has a quiet kind of anger that's far scarier than anything else
Edit: People forget Xie Lian is a Martial God and ascended for his Martial skills. They remember the flower and forget the sword.
The internet has corrupted me to the point where I assume any venn diagram is gonna be a shitpost
That gazebo is so fucked
Are you sure gazebo is the correct word?
Are
you
sure?
idk why you’re confused, that poor gazebo needs help
This has hit my dash three times… that final reblog made it worthy.
I only liked this for the gif
You cannot call for help, you must face the gazebo alone
do you think when Hua Cheng got his ghost form after dying (the physical one) he panicked and checked his body for Xie Lian's tattooed name on his arm?
129 days and 75 years 💔
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