Got a problem with me? Kiss me on the lips dude

*gracefully flips over a quesadilla* anyone would be lucky to have me

bro, i dont even care anymore. fuck it! *continues to try very hard*

I know this girl who is very conventionally attractive and probably every 3 months or so she posts on Facebook “anyone want to cash app me $5 for my birthday?” and none of the guys have caught on yet. She be having 4 birthdays a year and these thirsty guys are like “just sent it beautiful enjoy your day” and that is hot privilege

I’m still screaming that Beyoncé told people to charge their phones and get snacks while Post Malone preformed

sure i guess sex is okay but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper

brunch is gay culture because none of us are awake before 10 am

except farm gays. these are the most powerful gays and I dare not fuck with them