foreverJester

hold onto your padded asses, babies bc im about to spill some serious oolong

Ridiculously small kitten: “Myam myam myam. Njam njam njam njam njam njam njam! Myam myam myam nyam nyam myam. Mmmam. Mrrrrram. Meep!”

#can we turn kaiba into a llama

#does kaiba dress in drag??

“You threw off my groove!”

“I’m sorry, but you’ve thrown off the CEO’s groove.”

#omg would Marik’s shoulder devil be Yami Marik?

“Don’t listen to that guy. He’s trying to lead you down the path of righteousness.”

#Rebecca should be the wife 

#Ok Ok but Kuriboh would totally be the little squirrel >w> 

“Kurikurikuri??”

“No nonONONONONONO-”

  # The Big 5 turning into animals

“Get them!”

“Hey, I’ve been turned into a penguin. Can I go home?”

“For the last time, we did not order a Magic Cylinder!”

“You know pal, you could have told me that before I set it up.”

#would baby kaiba have blue eyes white dragon plushies?

“Hey Yugi, you just missed your relatives.”

“Yeah, we just sent them up to your house.”

#Kaiba lines up all the yugioh spinoff protags in a line looking for a rival

“Hate your hair. Your hair. And your hair. Annnnd…”

“Lemme guess, you have a great personality.”

# And instead of a sewer crocodile it’s some sewer dragon thing..lol…

ok this is “earring magic ken” who was introduced in 1992 (and discontinued shortly thereafter)

basically mattel had done a survey and discovered that girls didn’t think ken was “cool” enough

SO someone had the bright idea to research coolness by sending people to raves which, at the time, were mostly hosted & attended by gay men. so they went to these raves and took notes on what the fashions were and finally landed on this outfit, mesh shirt & all 

SO

MAGIC EARRING KEN. This bitch gay as HELL. supposedly the aforementioned rings on him are for “magic earrings” and clip on charms. These charms are advertised as totally COMPLETELY heterosexual, not gay at ALL, see there’s a Barbie that also has Magic Earring Action with clip on charms! Ken wears them to match, because he’s STRAIGHT

Here’s the issue: THERE IS NO MATCHING BARBIE. Magic Earring Ken is out here straight up wearing cock rings on his jacket with a thinly devised advertising ploy to make it SEEM not-gay. But it’s DEFINITELY GAY. (And if you’re thinking, why cock rings? Well way back in 1992 gay culture was HUGE on wearing cock rings, it was the in-style. Everyone who was gay wore one, even women; you sewed them to your leather jacket, and the placement indicated some of your sexual preference. In case you were wondering, Ken is a Bottom.)

AND IT GETS BETTER. Magic Earring Ken was on the shelves for six weeks before they pulled him. In that short amount of time? Magic Earring Ken became the BEST SELLING Barbie Doll Mattel has EVER SOLD. LET THAT SINK IN. SIX WEEKS. And now every time these wheezy old hetero windbag execs go to look at their sales board, they’re forever haunted by Magic Earring Ken at the top of their charts.

Jasmine Masters: Capricorn, Aries, Scorpio, Taurus

Trixie: Leo, Gemini, Pisces, Cancer