Mayzie

ts that Kai was up to in Monstrositys

I was looking for ninja plushies and found this:

having a panic attack regarding calling their family about sort of minor inconvenience vs your found family literally helping you to bury the body

all thoughts of awkward lulls float away whenever you go too long without seeing them

always having a place to stay with them

“now you be nice to auntie/uncle” great I’m crying now, thanks

spending every major holiday together

the act of creating simple, sweet traditions together

not even hesitating to stand up for one another

chaos that ensues when trying to put together a dinner for the whole group

being able to actually emote with them 

having the freedom to unmask and be

not knowing what to do with all the calm brain space

“you will never be left out” my abandonment issues beg to differ

•Not realizing when you became part of the family, just naturally falling into place.

•Alternatively, a day where it suddenly slams into you full force that these people are your family and it makes your world rotate on its axis.

•Feeling awkward using parent/sibling/etc. titles at first even if the rest of the found family uses them because you're worried it's not your place, that you don't belong as much as the rest of them do.

•Finally building up the courage to start causally saying 'my older brother', 'my mom', 'my cousin' to people without feeling the need to rush to clarify that they're not "really" your family. The rush of joy makes you decide you'll never stop, even if people get confused over how many relatives you have.

•Maybe you had started saying them around other people but not your family yet because you were nervous, and you got so used to it that you slip up and call one of them that while they're there. You freeze and are about to apologize, but they grin and wrap you in a hug, ecstatic at having earned the title (although some light teasing may still be in order for you trying to keep it secret that you felt that way).

•Your parent introducing you as their kid for the first time to an acquaintance. You feel so giddy that you couldn't possibly disagree, even if you hadn't felt comfortable enough to call them your parent yet.

•Meeting one of your older siblings friends and finding out they call you their younger sibling all the time when they talk about you. You can't decide whether to cry from joy or be a little embarrassed.

•The first time your younger sibling comes to you with a homework problem/asking for help with a project/asking you to read to them. They could've asked anyone, but they wanted your help, and your heart soars.

•The first time in the car alone with a member of your found family who you haven't really gotten to know yet. Maybe they were the only person able to give you a ride to something that day. It starts out awkward, you're a little intimidated, but they ask you what music you want to put on, and they start cracking jokes and by the end of the drive you're talking and laughing together like it's the easiest thing in the world.

“You're all I got.”

“I've never really belonged before.”

“Come on, give me a hug. Get in here. You too, don't try to sneak out.”

“I wish I'd found you guys sooner.”

“Don't you have your own room?” “I feel safer here.” “Alright then, couch or bed?”

“This is the closest thing I have to home.”

“You don't have to deal with this on your own, you know that right?”

“It feels like we've always known each other.”

“Can we please go home?” “Home? … Yeah, we'll go home.”

“Shut up. We're family, your insecurities are stupid if they are telling you any different.”

“You're not gonna be getting rid of me now.”

“Remember, when you're ready to talk, I'm here.”

“What's that… Don't tell me those kids were messing with you again.”

“Who said that? Only I get to tease you about that!”

“I've never had a place to call my own before.”

“There you are! Do not do that again, I was fucking worried about you!”

✭  “You're hit.”      “It's nothing.” “Stay close, liar.”

✭  “Where is [name]?”      “Saw them holding down the other side.” “Go check on them.”

✭  “Duck!”      *crouches just in time before their friend's weapon swishes over their head*

✭  “Behind you!”      “Whoa! That was close. Thanks.”

✭  “You think [name] needs any help?”      “Nah. Look at 'em. They're having the time of their life.”

✭  “We need backup!”      “They're on their way. We just need to hold down a little longer.”

✭  “You okay?”      “Peachy.”

✭  “Stay down, we got it from here.”      “No, I can- *gets dizzy and sits back down* Yeah, okay.”

✭  [after the fight] “Okay, headcount! Everyone find their buddy and check on them.”

requested by: @20-crows-in-a-trenchcoat

Feel free to use and reblog!

being torn between opening up and shutting everyone out

needing help but being unable to ask for it

keeping things to themselves even though they know they shouldn't

falling back into old patterns

not being ready to trust anyone new

saying the opposite of what they're feeling

not feeling seen as they had hoped

only taking care of everyone else but not themselves

not wanting to be 'fixed'

being extremely grateful for their found family but feeling bad for not being able to show their gratitude

still having to sort their feelings out on their own because they can't stand to be seen in an emotional state

crying when someone shows them love

thinking they're too sensitive/too broken to be a part of the found family

holding back from truly being themselves

not knowing how to handle being accepted by someone for the first time

being stressed out about possibly doing something wrong because they're terrified to lose what they finally have

being unable to believe that the support in the found family is really unconditional

'Will they leave me? Will they leave me? Will they leave?' as the constant background noise in their head

being unable to tell the truth