massiveshitlord

Customer (calling from Ireland): “Yes hello, I would like to -”

Sheep in the background: *gentle baa*

Customer: “Uh, sorry, what I want to do is -”

Sheep: *slightly more insistent baa*

Customer: “No, not now! -cough- Excuse me. I have a reservation and -”

Sheep: *VERY LOUD ACCUSATORY BAA*

Customer: “Arnulf! Please be quiet, I am on the phone! … Sorry, I sincerely apologize on behalf of Arnulf.”

me: “I love and forgive him.”

Customer: “Don’t, he doesn’t deserve it. Anyway, I’m calling about -”

Arnulf: *small, very self-satisfied baa*

they’re all following this jesus nonsense instead of the old roman religion

they only know what it’s like under the empire and not the glory of the res publica

all of them want to follow weird greek fashions like writing poetry and growing beards instead of following the mos maiorum and wearing togas

they’re all so used to this cushy “pax romana” nonsense that none of them want to conquer anything like their ancestors did, and they probably don’t even remember carthage

they have no idea what it was like living before the common era

#SO IS THIS WHY MY CATS ASK TO BE LET IN BECAUSE IT’S RAINING #AND THEN IMMEDIATELY GO TO THE OTHER DOOR AND ASK TO BE LET OUT AGAIN? 

YUP, THAT’S WHY. CATS ARE BIG DUMMIES AND OFTEN SEE NO REASON WHY TWO DIFFERENT DOORS SHOULD LEAD TO THE SAME PLACE, SO THEY FIGURE THEY’LL CHECK IF IT’S ALSO RAINING IN THE OTHER OUTSIDE BEHIND THE OTHER DOOR. 

reading tons of stories where everyone dies

not knowing how to ask where the bathroom is in your foreign language but knowing how to say 20 different ways to kill someone

bonding by crying over ancient greek together

dicks everywhere

“so how is studying classics useful”

the eternal embarrassment of knowing that sigmund freud is partially our fault

dicks everywhere

sometimes there are vaginas and tiddies too but mostly dicks

no employee wants to be a schliemann

for all of you archaeologists out there: dust lust