As a bi woman who writes lesbians professionally, I want it known that I was 1000% on board with them as a couple, and cleared literal days of my schedule to play it and confirm.

And I still don't think Aloy is ready for romance. I think The Kiss is the least plausible, and least enjoyable, of the three endings.

Let's dive into why.

It starts at childhood, as always.

Aloy has grown up an outcast. She relied on herself and Rost--and then Rost died, and it was just her. Every single chance she's had, she's rebuked romance. She wrote it off as "I'm saving the world" or "I just don't know how people work yet," but the reality is that she doesn't know HOW to rely on people.

Vulnerability is a learned skill.

I'll say it again. VULNERABILITY is a LEARNED skill.

Some people, those with healthy households, learn this skill early on, and practice it often. Those are the people we see giving everything of themselves to someone they love. They feel deeply, empathize well, and have happy relationships.

And then there's people like Aloy. Someone who was shown love from one person--and a whole lotta hate from the rest of them. Someone who grew up being told that she couldn't rely on a tribe--because if she failed the Proving, there wouldn't BE a tribe to rely on. Rost hoped for the best... and prepared her for the worst.

Then she dove into the world at large, and was presented time and time again with romance opportunities. The Sun King is the biggest one--obviously his infatuation ran deep, but of course it would, finding the one person in a whole kingdom who'd challenge him. She turned him down, and in her mind, she probably reasoned it away in a neat little box.

"I'm not like the other suitors he's met. He only likes me because I'm different."

This can be true.

"But he doesn't know who I really am."

This can be true--but it's also a defense mechanism. A barrier Aloy placed to protect herself from rejection. Because if she convinces herself these people don't really know her, it's easy for her to keep them at arm's length.

Easy to be the lone warrior.

We see the same kind of thing with Varl, hoping to follow her into the wilds. With Erend, so excited to see her, so irritated she doesn't reciprocate. Kotollo viewed her admirably, although I think his personality is a bit too subservient to truly challenge Aloy (essentially his commander) into the growth she needs.

Man after man demonstrated their affection, and she held them all at arm's length. For the good of the world, right?

So, okay. She's a lesbian--or at the very least, bi or pan. We can reason away the men, certainly, but she uses the same techniques with the women. Talanah, our fan favorite, was truly a perfect match for Aloy. Strong, resilient, excellent fighter. They progressed in the same way Seyka did--and yet, Talanah was deep in the throes of another man.

Which was probably a huge fucking relief to Aloy. Because if Talanah was after a guy... then she wasn't an option for Aloy.

Which means Aloy didn't have to do any intensive introspection to discover why they might be a good match.

She could wave Talanah away, and feel absolutely no remorse or grief when Talanah returned home. In fact, Aloy might have even left that experience feeling satisfied that she helped a friend--and be utterly oblivious to the chemistry they could have had.

This is how avoidant people--those who haven't learned to trust, to rely on others, to show vulnerability--experience the world.

And this is somewhat devastating, because Talanah's quest came at the exact time that Varl was teaching Aloy how to empathize, lean on people, be vulnerable for the first time in her life. Aloy didn't have to do it alone--and if Talanah had been in a position to receive it, I think they could have had a spectacular romance.

But it didn't happen.

So, we move on.

Aloy loses Varl, learns to lean on her friends, learns to let people in. This alone is spectacular character growth--but it's easy to have friends. Humans crave it. We need companionship, so once Varl laid the groundwork, Aloy was able to embrace this.

We don't see her embracing romance.

Until Seyka.

This is where the potential had me--and the execution lost me.

Because Seyka is presented as this fantastic option for Aloy--and the starving, desperate fanbase standing behind her. From the first interaction, I had high hopes. When Aloy says, "you must be confused," and Seyka basically responds with "confused about why you'd FLY towards that TOWER OF DEATH, maybe," I was ready for someone who challenges Aloy.

I wanted a love interest who was more competent than Aloy in some ways. I actually liked Varl in that way, before he found Zo: the fact that he challenged Aloy to push her own comfort level in order to embrace others was a great complement to Aloy's abrasive nature.

Seyka, while fantastic, almost feels like an Aloy clone.

They're both competent, capable, and closed-off. They're both hiding secrets to spare the others' feelings--when in reality, they're sparing themselves from tough conversations.

Because that's what Aloy, at least, has been trained to do. Bear the burden alone to spare the others. Fight the machine alone to keep the others safe. She protects fiercely, which means that she never has to be the one experiencing loss.

How convenient. >.>

I love the idea of Seyka. I can't wait to see where fanon takes her personality. But right now, with just the DLC content, it feels like she's the caricature of a romantic interest for Aloy. The perfect girl--in theory. But not when you consider psychology.

There was a huge missed opportunity when Aloy finally revealed Nemesis's existence, in my opinion. Aloy protected Seyka from this Big, Dangerous News to help her morale--and to keep from ruining what they've developed with something possibly devastating.

She finally told Seyka... and Seyka responded by literally fleeing the room in horror.

I get that everyone needs time to process these things. But in my mind, all that reaffirmed for Aloy is, "My instincts were right. I can't rely on others with this Big, Dangerous News. They can't handle it. So, I have to handle it for them."

There was SUCH an opportunity there. A chance for Aloy to tell her, and for Seyka to contemplate it for a moment, smile, and say, "I'm glad you told me. Let's tackle it together."

Something to show Aloy, in that concrete moment, that this is a person she can rely on.

That is what would have made Seyka great, to me.

Everything that followed after is a series of insta-love, in my opinion. Aloy looks at Seyka with near-literal hearts in her eyes, but it didn't feel earned. By the end, I don't feel like Seyka did anything unique that Aloy's friends in Forbidden West hadn't already done to her at some point: rescue her, adventure with her, stop a massive scheme with her.

Seyka, in my mind, doesn't currently have enough personality of her own to stand out. She's just another soldier in Aloy's army.

There will be [straight] people angry at the LGBT+ rep here, and I don't even feel that our community can argue it. As far as lesbian rep goes, that was not a great example of a natural romance. It felt forced for most of that DLC.

But that romance could be great. And that's where I love that the developers added options other than the kiss. As much as I loved the idea of them kissing, I still don't buy it with the scenes we were given.

Seyka latched onto Aloy because Aloy treated her with admiration at a time when Seyka's tribe nearly disowned her. Fair. I believe Seyka might truly be in love with Aloy.

But Aloy herself? There's no way in hell she'd be diving into a romantic relationship after one single adventure with this girl--even one as sweeping as this. Aloy doesn't know who Seyka is. Aloy hasn't seen Seyka in a relaxed setting--only one where she's panicking for her tribe, her sister, and the future. And Aloy's brain will be too logic-entrenched to succumb to emotional impulse alone.

Because that's the interesting thing about avoidant people. They rely on themselves, and their logic. That's what's kept them alive until this point. If Aloy showed vulnerability in the past, she put herself at risk in every sense of the word.

Even Seyka wouldn't be enough to break that barrier right away.

But I do think she could try in the sequel, and that's why I'm thrilled for this character. Someone the developers can truly use to force Aloy to grow emotionally.

To do that, though, the developers will have to dive into Seyka, and show me why she's the person for Aloy. What about her history makes her The Candidate? It can't just be that she's "an inspiration." I need more than that. I need to see Seyka in a relationship, coaxing Aloy through the moments of panic and shattering the barriers Aloy erects out of fear, under the guise of "logic."

Show me that, and I'm on board with a kiss.

Until then, I'll go write some fanfiction.

Sincerely,

An avoidant working through her own shit.