you have played the game well

The apple they fed to snow white wasnt poision at all it was just a red delicious

Bro what’s wrong? You barely touched your six egg and treat

they put my blood through every test under the sun and yet nowhere in the pages and pages of lab reports do they tell me what my blood type is

your neutrophils absolute? 2.71. anion gap? why, that's 11! hemoglobin A1C? a solid 5.4. and don't fret, champ—your VLDL (calculated) is a cool 12. real fascinating stuff. hm? what's that? you want to know what kind of blood you have? like, so you won't have to look your next ER nurse in the eye and tell her you have no clue what type you have right after giving her a date of birth that confirms you are over 30 years old? psh, don't be silly! we can't tell you that! it's a ✨secret✨

I remember someone in a dingey office that definitely wasn't a medical clinic sticking my finger like eight times in a row to try to get a drop of blood when I was about four years old and I assume that was for a typing test for Reasons Unknown but nobody has ever told me my blood type and I can't give blood so I can't even sneak the information out of the Red Cross in exchange for good deeds.

the part that kills me so much too is that when Shane is high as fuck pitching the cottage one of his talking points is it would be so fun. he literally says it would be so fun. high as fuck and the main thought that filtered through was I wanna kick around a soccer ball in the backyard with you. will you kick around a soccer ball in the backyard with me?

Ilya comes into the locker room with a black eye he didn’t have the night before. Everyone’s oohing and aahing and shane is. Very quiet. A little perturbed. People are making jokes about their sex life and shane is seething into his locker. The team finally fully gangs up on shane like hollander what kind of freak shit are you doing, huh? Sex swing gone wrong?? Knee to the face? And shane turns, crosses his arms and stares at the floor and states, very solemnly, “ilya got a yo-yo”

This blog is anti chatgpt and pro breeding kink without the pregnancy part