the thing about me is that im not a neutral fan. i dont want what's "good for the sport". i want to see MY favorites win everything and for everybody ELSE to kill themselves. yes i am a hypocrite and a drama queen but that is what a true sports fan is

went to Me island and I was there yesss

feels like im always recovering. when do i get to live

"it's okay to rest for as long as you need from burnout" how long is it actually going to take though. there's stuff i wanna do.

You really do get over it on a random day.

people who tell you to stop reading the news to "regulate your nervous system" do not have your best interests at heart. if following current events makes you spiral you probably need a better analytical frame, not less information

and the analytical frame you need is probably dialectical materialism

i'm totally crazy, i freak out all the time, but you know what helps me most? learning. reading. studying. discussing. sometimes you do need a nap, but sometimes you need a conversation with someone more knowledgeable/experienced, or a day at the (physical or digital) library. and really i think everyone has a different baseline emotional register that's best for them and their circumstances, but i recommend aiming to feel solid and anchored, not necessarily "calm." of course we won't feel "calm" after reading about genocide. but if we approach what we're reading correctly, it can strengthen our resolve; feed our fighting spirit; show us paths to liberation. a lot of people in my life have diagnosed me with "revolutionary optimism" and wonder how i maintain that mindset but i'm not an optimist by nature, it all comes from studying

i cannot wait to financially afford who i really am