Kianizm‽

A thought came suddenly. At first I only thought about Suzuya Juuzou from Tokyo Ghoul then I thought about Kotone (FeMC Persona 3).

Kotone hairpin is XXII which is a Roman numeral. If we change it to Arabic numerals (the numbers we usually use every day) then it is the 22nd number. Considering that Persona uses a system related to Tarot, the XXII (22) Arcana in the tarot deck is The Fool, which is the Arcana of Kotone and the modern version persona protagonists (3, 4, and 5). In the 22 Major Arcana system, the Fool card is usually placed as number 0 (the beginning), but in some historical traditions, The Fool is numbered 22 as the conclusion of a spiritual journey.

Meanwhile, early Suzuya Juuzou has hairpins of the Roman numeral XIII (the number 13). In Tarot, it is the Death Arcana that represents a psychological shift where shedding the old (such as bad habits, relationships, or outdated perspectives) is necessary to make way for personal evolution and rebirth. And as we all probably already knew, the number 13 is considered an unlucky or cursed number, or a number that brings misfortune. Fun fact, it is considered a cursed number especially because of stories in religion and folklore. In Christianity, Judas Iscariot was the 13th guest present at the Last Supper and betrayed Jesus. Additionally, in Norse Mythology, the trickster god Loki was the 13th guest who triggered chaos that killed the god of light.

You can also see that the hairclips of Suzuya in Tokyo Ghoul:RE changed. It became XX. The Roman numeral XX is 20. The number 20 itself has the symbolism of perfect waiting, the beginning of a new spiritual journey, and relational balance. Spiritually, this number represents the end of a life cycle and a transition toward a phase of greater potential. The number 20 represents the end of the second cycle (twice the power of the vibration of ten). In Tarot, the number 20 is associated with the Judgement card, which means resurrection and the principle of what you sow is what you reap. Meanwhile, in Japanese culture, there is a special term, namely hatachi (二十歳), to mark the 20th birthday, which becomes the age of legal adulthood and privileges for a person.

When I was in seventh grade, my mom made me join a basketball club outside of school. I did not know anything about basketball at all. After a few weeks, I finally realized that I did not really like it and that this sport was not made for me. After my first day there i I often don't attend every week. When I do, I can't help but feel nervous, even though I cope with the music on the train when I go to my basketball club. Lots of times I skip school with various excuses, often because I'm feeling unwell. I can't really fake physical illnesses, so every night or the day before the day I have to attend, I'll stay up late secretly or harm myself with something that would probably make me sick the next day so I can't go.

​On my first day, I went to the class for fifteen to seventeen year old girls because they were the same height as me, even though we had a massive age gap, i was always been taller than kids my age since i was 10 because my mom made me like that, though bcz of that i cant really enjoy my childhood bcz of my looks. One of the main reasons why i go to them older girls club session is bcz i was so scared to be with the younger kids because they genuinely overwhelmed me, and I was worried that I might accidentally hurt them.​

We started that first day at five pm, and I was already tired by five thirty pm because the exercises were genuinely exhausting and overwhelming. However, I kept on going. Then, around five fifty pm, the coach made us play some sort of coordination game or sum. I did not understand the rules one bit, and I felt guilty because I think all of us got punished with pushups since I kept messing up.​