there's worth in every life!

The whole reason I was drawn to MHA as a story to begin with was because of it's initial focus on rehabilitation. There's a lot of emphasis on how often even villains - criminals, "bad people", however you want to define them - can be victims as well, often deserving better than the lot they've had in life and deserving of a chance to change and be better, too. Now, the ending didn't exactly end up delivering on those themes, which I'm still really disappointed about - but my thoughts on MHA's ending (& the series as a whole) is another post I'm working on making so I'll save the talk about that for that one, lol.

The point is... I've always been strongly drawn towards those kinds of ideals - belief in redemption, rehabilitative over punitive justice, etc, and at least at the moment they're ideals I do believe in (and certainly feel strongly about). But I'm also often doubting myself about them. Like... I often wonder if a focus on rehabilitation in criminal justice is fair to the victims of crime, and because of that (in combination with my moral OCD) I often then freeze up and find it difficult to get myself to look into the topic in any real depth. Which makes me very uninformed overall.

But I really want that to change! As far as I'm aware, rehabilitative systems in prisons tend to be much more successful in preventing crime/reoffending than punitive ones. This also suggests to me that most people are capable of change and becoming better. But... when it comes to if I can be sure, it's not like I've read any of the research on the topic myself. Is the success of rehabilitative systems in some countries possible to replicate in others? Are there other factors in play? etc etc.

On top of that, I worry often about the feelings of victims on this sort of thing, and if a focus on avoiding punishment is really fair to them. I don't know that punishment really does much good in changing behavior - but it makes sense to me that plenty of victims of crime want to see offenders punished, and I can't really fault them for that at all. Yes, punishment isn't going to reverse the damage done, but if you have to deal with the consequences of a crime for the rest of your life, isn't it only fair that the one who caused it feel something of the same as well? More specifically, if they, the offender, isn't suffering, but you - the victim - have no choice but to deal with trauma and/or loss that's been forced on you every day... idk. I can easily imagine how that knowledge could impact someone's wellbeing in a negative way and even harm their recovery from what happened.

To start with, I think I kind of had a particular image in my head of Aizawa as someone who reacted to Oboro's death in a very specific way. But I'm now wondering if things might have been a bit different than I thought, in terms of like… his self-awareness about his feelings, I think? Mostly.

Reading the manga, there's several points that give off the impression he's punishing himself, and at the very least it's very clear he's been miserable since Oboro died. I think you can see it clearly in his behaviour + countenance in general, but the scene in the gym where he's training a year after Oboro's death with bloodied hands, and the general metaphor/imagery surrounding how it's been "raining" for Aizawa ever since he lost Oboro/the rain never stopped for him are like. Some scenes that come to mind in that regard. And I always thought of him as self-punishing very intentionally and being like… I guess very aware of how miserable he is and how much he's upset about what happened to Oboro, but I actually think now that maybe that's not necessarily the case?

Like, not to the point where you can point at either interpretation and say "this is canon", but still. When I read his characterization in Vigilantes and go through the school days arc again, I almost feel like he's most of all very resigned after Oboro's death, even more than he was as a teen. There's a lot of emphasis on how he felt powerless and like he's not the type of person who can do anything good or produce anything positive as a teenager, and he was starting to come out of that mindset for a while thanks to Oboro… but I think that when Oboro died, he not only fell back into the way he was before, but was also more certain about it. That might not be the right word, but. As a teen, despite feeling he couldn't be different, he still wanted to be - some part of him was still wanting to believe he could be the type of hero who genuinely saves people. It's possible that some of his hesitation and attitude came from the conflict between that hope and his own lack of confidence,, too.

But after Oboro dies, I feel like he kind of buries that dream entirely. He still wants it deep down, but he's now completely positive that that genuine type of hero isn't something that can ever be - it's not worth hoping for, and that's just how it is. So he tells himself it's not something he wants anymore and shuts down any thoughts about it being possible. As a kid, he could admit to himself that maybe he wanted things to be different, there was some uncertainty over if he could change himself, but now he's confident that the answer is no, he can't.

Writing that down I wonder if I've just written a bunch of nonsense that isn't coherent lmao, whoops... I'm not quite sure how to articulate what I'm thinking? But in terms of his self-esteem as an adult (pre-teaching) too, I think he clearly thinks lowly of himself and sees himself as like. Incapable. Not the kind of guy who's kind or who can be kind, not really deserving of anything particularly. But rather than being honest with himself about what that means to him/how it affects him, I wonder if he told himself he's fine with it? That it's Just How Things Are. There's no point in hoping for anything different so he won't dwell on it, he's fine, it's not like he's depressed or anything, what would be the point, in a way?

And so I think after he starts teaching he becomes more honest with himself in terms of acknowledging to himself what he actually wants, and maybe even hoping for more again. He still doesn't completely change his mindset - I think there are still quite a few things he sees himself as incapable of even in MHA's timeline proper, but at the very least, he starts thinking that teaching might be something he can actually do. Hell, maybe he wasn't even admitting to himself how upset he was about Oboro's death until that moment as well? Because he felt like he should be over it or just… wasn't able to cope with those feelings, since they were too painful...

obviously we know mic does care - i can think of the scene where he punches garaki specifically for upsetting aizawa, and how protective he is of aizawa re: kurogiri and wanting to preserve shirakumo's memory later off the top of my head to show that - but i mean more in terms of things aizawa actually sees and is there for......... if that makes sense?? not sure i articulated that right, but.

I just find it really interesting!! In a few senses, I'd argue that he's actually pretty sympathetic to a lot of people who'd usually be labeled as villains. Even in the early chapters, we can see Nemuri mentioning that Aizawa has "connections" to the underworld and specifically gives that a reason for why he'd be a good fit to help Tsukauchi with his case in Naruhata. We can see that with how he interacts with the Hotta brothers as well - his initially rough approach aside, he's pretty understanding / willing to let their technical crimes pass while speaking to them just as people, even if it is for the information they might be able to give him.

Then there's small scenes like how he watches over Teruo before handing him to the police for a bit so he can hear the end of Pop Step's concert... which is a moment I love/personally found really sweet... Though of course, in this situation he's aware that Teruo's likely more of a victim than someone committing crimes willingly due to the whole instant villain situation, so it's not really evidence for his usual approach to villains necessarily.

And on the other hand, there are times where he comes across as pretty condemning to villains/criminals instead. Which is, of course, kind of his job, but... I'm thinking of how Kamayan/the Hotta brothers continuously call him out (for laughs mostly to be fair) on "treating people as villains" / being too judgemental, and particularly the line he has where he says something like "you think I'm gonna treat a bunch of criminal scum with kid gloves?" So clearly there are some types of villains/criminals he has no sympathy for, which is honestly super reasonable I think (lol), but still interesting to me all the same.

OBVIOUSLY THIS DOESN'T ALL NECESSARILY MEAN MUCH, and "sympathetic to some circumstances but not others" not exactly a noteworthy perspective that's groundbreaking among the heroes or anything, but. Coming at it all from the perspective of some of MHA's themes and it's focus (even if it's not the only focus!) on the flaws of hero society, and the idea of reaching a hand out even to the villains as a heroic act... I'm just really interested on where Aizawa stands in that dichotomy (between those like the kids who do end up reaching out in the end, and the Pros who are often more blind to how the villains ended up the way they did. Iirc.) and how it changes throughout the main series as well. Which really makes me wish I had a better memory of all the details in the main manga properly, rip... I'd love to go through it and analyze Aizawa's perspective/things I notice in that regard sometime, but I don't expect I'll manage to for a long time, considering my trouble with concentration/task initiation has come back strong lately... (tfw when the adhd meds stop working. rip me.)

In the official manga translation, she talks about how she said some really harsh things to the group who wanted to save Bakugou, and how she was shocked about how they went anyway despite her trying to stop them. But she specifically says that she's "shocked about how I tried to stop you", which to me makes it sound like she's feeling guilty about the fact that she tried to stop them to begin with, and that she's possibly changed her mind about it being a villainous act, thinking her judgement was too harsh.

But in the subtitles for when I was watching the equivalent episode, she instead says she was filled with bad feelings after they went ahead with the plan because she thought she'd stopped them. Which I feel implies she's more upset that she didn't succeed - she still thinks they shouldn't have gone, and is beating herself up specifically because her words weren't enough to convince them??

The point is, Kurogiri didn't get either of those things. And though with a lot of Horikoshi's choices I can kind of get them even when I think they're bad myself... there's really no defense for how he handled Kurogiri I feel, lmao.