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@madeofpatterns
Maybe Iāll come back for a while.

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what are some kids books that hold up? Iām making a list for my little nephew! definitely all of Animorphs (need to give this kid the same brain disease me and my sister got)
Second the Tiffany Aching series by Terry Pratchett.
My little one is just old enough to start noticing the plot so itās almost time to start her on more shaping story lines too.
For toddlers, Simon Sock is a delightful board book.
God fucking damn Iām so fucking tired anyway Iām starting to see people posting voting photos so itās time to let you know that Iām giving out presents if yāallĀ vote or donate.
When you vote:
Keep your āi votedā sticker
Put it on your hand
Take a pic of your hand next to a pic of your blog header
Send it to me as a direct message
And I will give you:
A unique sketch of your choice of pokemon
A 30-second electric kazoo recording of your favorite bit of a song to use as a ringtone
A 100-ish word short story on the topic of your choice
An extremely cute picture of my very adorable dog.
My bribes to you will be posted publicly but you will be notified privately if you want. If you donāt want me to share your name or photo just say so and Iāll message you instead of tagging you but I want to tag yāall because I want you to get to brag about the shiny present I gave you to celebrate Voting Day.
If voting is old hat to you, or if you arenāt in the US and you want to celebrate voting day I will give any of the presents above to anyone who makes at least a $5 donation to the ACLU (if you do that one screencap your donation confirmation and your blog in the same window and message it to me)
Please fucking vote. I love you.
*do not send me a photo of/with your ballot, i donāt know your jurisdictionās rules about what invalidates a ballot so I donāt want to risk it - stickers or stubs only plz*
Honestly if youāre female and youāre called for jury duty and during the elimination process youāre asked if youāve ever had any adverse experience with a man (harrassment or rape or any other male violence) just fuckin lie and say no. Then vote that fucker guilty
Women survivors are barred from serving on a jury but rapists are not even questioned. There can be no doubt that this is a major reason rapists walk free. Men have never played fair. It is time for women to start beating them at their own game. Our lives depend on it.
As someone who wants to be a prosecutor one day⦠I agree.
OK NO.Ā NO NO NO NO NO.Ā I am a defense attorney. I am a woman. I am also a sexual assault survivor.Ā Ā THAT BEING SAID I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS POST ALL WEEK AND ITāSĀ SOOOOO FUCKING WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS.Ā
Itās wrong not for any bullshit rape apologist shit, btw, itās wrong BECAUSE THIS SHIT WILL LITERALLY FUCK YOU OVER AND FUCK OVER ANY RAPE VICTIMS TOO. Hereās why:Ā
(bear in mind this advice is gonna be MD specific since thatās where I practice)
1) FIRST THINGS FIRST. Donāt fucking lie. Donāt you dare fucking lie when youāre being questioned at jury duty.Ā Why? OK well first: youāre swearing to tell the truth under penalty of perjury.Ā What that means is yes, you will face criminal charges.Ā Criminal charges which, btw, will keep you off of any juries in the future.
Hereās the thing, people (the law enforcement authorities and the defense counsel) WILL be able to find this out especially if you have ever filed a formal police report and/or spoken publicly about it.Ā Yes, even on facebook.Ā This ALSO means that if the fact that you lied about this is found out mid-trial itās grounds for a mistrial with prejudice, if not a straight dismissal.Ā Which means that hey, look, EVERYTHING HAS TO START ALL OVER AGAIN, THIS TIME WITH NEW JURORS.Ā
2) The second thing is this: in many states, you donāt just get dismissed after answering affirmatively.Ā The voir dire process in MD works like this:
A) prosecutors and the defense come up with a list of questions to ask potential jurors.Ā These are typically a combination of blanket questions you would ask at any trial (ex: have you ever been convicted of a crime in this jurisdiction) and specific questions tailored to the hearing in particular (like the question above).Ā Both attorneys get the chance to view each otherās questions and object to any particular questions that the other team may have.Ā
B)Ā So weāre at jury selection.Ā Both attorneys argue preliminary whether or not questions get to be asked or not, submit the questions to the judge, and decide how to do the striking. (all at once submitted on paper, or alternating).Ā
B1)Ā āstrikingā means asking to get rid of a juror.Ā A strike can be peremptory, i.e., you can strike for whatever reason you want and donāt have to justify it, automatically. Or you can have a strike FOR CAUSE.Ā Ā Ā There are a limit to how many peremptory strikes/challenges you can have, depending on the jurisdiction, and the type of crime.Ā And you may or may not have to justify those strikes and turn them intoĀ āfor cause.āĀ
B2) generally if, during a question, a juror answers in the affirmative, the judge will ask you to go up to the bench to privately discuss it with the judge, and both attorneys.Ā In this case they will ask if you or somebody you know was a victim.Ā They will also ask if the incident occurred in the same jurisdiction and possibly involved the same arresting officers.Ā They will THEN ask you if you feel so strongly that it will affect your ability to be IMPARTIALāthat is, will you still be able to only consider the facts presented to you in the court, and be able to judge something as proven beyond a reasonable doubt or not, or will you be biased?Ā
B3) If you sayĀ āI am so biasedā then yeah, the judge will excuse you right away.Ā But if you sayĀ āNo I think I can do it. I can be impartial.ā youāll be asked to return to your seat.Ā
C) The questions are now done.Ā The attorneys then go through their strikes.Ā Like I said, they have a limited number of the peremptory ones.Ā And there are other limits too.Ā You canāt strike jurors on the basis of aĀ āprotected classā (i.e.: race, gender, religion etc.) and anything that SHOWS that an attorney is doing so a can be objected to by the other attorney.Ā There doesnāt have to be aĀ āpatternā but that helps (i.e. striking three women in a row).Ā Every time a juror gets called and somebody requests a strike, the other attorney can either object or not.Ā So itās up to each attorney to protect the jurors they want (and btw other than the questions, in MD, the info you get as an attorney is the jurorās name, age, job, and where they live, and their spouseāsĀ job).Ā If thereās a disagreement then the judge will hear arguments either way.Ā If itās a protected class argument, the attorney who has been striking has to come up with a different reason to justify and thatās got to be something UNRELATED to the protected class (ex: if you struck two Black guys in a row you canāt sayĀ āoh well I didnāt want THESE Black guys I wanted the other onesā because thatās still BASED ON RACE).Ā
āāāā
3) SO HEREāS WHY ITāS SO FUCKED UP TO EVEN SUGGEST THIS SHIT AS A WAY TOĀ āSOLVE THE PROBLEMāĀ
A)Ā as I said above, you donāt want to fucking lie.Ā
B) also BEING A CONVICTED FELON, BTW, AND OTHER TYPES OF CONVICTIONS, DISQUALIFIES YOU FROM BEING ON THE JURY. Soā¦convicted rapists? yeah, they canāt actually serve. THIS IS LITERALLY A QUESTION ON THE JURY DUTY FORM AND IS A QUESTION ASKED AT EVERY STAGE OF SELECTION.Ā
C) ALSO, in a couple of the posts Iāve seen theyāve mentioned this question was only asked for women. Iām not sure really if I, as an attorney, would have phrased a question in a gendered way like this SINCE ITāS BASICALLY BEGGING FOR A CHALLENGE AS A PROTECTED CLASS OBJECTION.Ā So fine, if itās asked gender neutral? Thatās OK, but as I said, you wonāt get dismissed instantaneously (at least not in MD) as itās not one of those automatic questions the court asks (i.e.: are you a citizen etc.).Ā And so (again, in Md, Idk about other states) If you sayĀ āyes I can be impartialā then fine. Sit your ass down and wait for an attorney to strike you.Ā
D) so if you DO have an attorney striking you, I would ABSOLUTELY object to any attorney who systematically struck ALL THE WOMEN from a jury panel.Ā Because fuck that thatās a protected class that fucking SO DEMONSTRATIVE of a violation of the law.Ā ITāS GENDER BASED. Whoever the prosecutor was who allowed a defense attorney to get away with that shit just wasnāt doing their fucking job.Ā
E) And in terms of this post? about nobody caring? Fuck that if I was a prosecutor I would absolutely ask if any person (āPERSONā DAMN IT NOT JUST MEN BECAUSE THE WIVES/SISTERS/MOTHERS etc. OF MEN WHO ARE ACCUSED OF RAPE ARE ALSO FUCKING BIASED) had ever been accused of rape or sexual assault or knew somebody who did etc. Thatās just good lawyering. Itās sloppy not to do so.Ā
F) And as a defense attorney, NGL, I would want to know the answer too, in order to make sure to challenge those strikes.Ā Ā
āā-
I get it. I fucking get it. And some of these things will depend on how fucked up your judge is and how good the other side is.Ā But this shit aboutĀ āOH HEY JUST LIEā FUCK ME NO. DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS.Ā Ā
Iām so fucking furious that people are spreading this like itās a good damn idea and something that will work.Ā Honestly this is so fucking stupid and dangerous to me that Iām suspiciousāis this for real? Or is this somebody trying to false information troll people?Ā
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT DO THIS. Answer your questions truthfully and let the lawyers do their damn job.Ā Yes, it sucks, but at the end of the day, people in this country are INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY.Ā And your job, as a juror, is to ASSESS ONLY THE FACTS AND ARGUMENTS PRESENTED TO YOU, AND TO SEE IF THE STATE WAS ABLE TO PROVE THAT THIS PARTICULAR SUSPECT DID IT. AND THEY DID IT BEYOND A REASONABLE DOUBT.Ā
THe fact is, not all rape cases go to trial.Ā And the ones that do, DISPROPORTIONATELY charge men of color (in particular, Black and Latino men).Ā You cannot believe in equality, fight against racism, protect the constitution AND ALSo try to do this shit.Ā Itās fucked up and completely inconsistent and yet another way to fuck with the justice system.Ā doing this will probably allow more alleged rapists to go free than it will allow for equality in jury selection.Ā
TL;DR: this shit is really fucking bad advice and not the way to actually go about doing things. Ā stop giving people legal advice IF YOU ARENāT A LAWYER. ESPECIALLY IF THAT LEGAL ADVICE that will actually put them in jail, people.
ok now iām just imagining how much of a clusterfuck the official hogwarts twitter would be
itās 25% official announcements, 25% Dire Warnings, and 50% dumbledore drunktweeting on the wrong account

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@temporalnocturne
this local woman who has a tomboy kid reached out to my butch group to see if a few of us wouldnāt mind having brunch with her family and a couple more of the girls tomboy friends, cuz she read that itās important for your development to have adult versions of āpeople like youā in your life when youāre growing up. which is definitely true. so weāre going over tomorrow. can you believe that? like, Iām gonna cry.
Op how did it go if I may ask?
Hi! Figure Iāll answer everyone at once here. It was kinda incredible⦠it was three little tomboy kids, 5 adult butch pals, and a couple of the parents, eating pancakes and muffins and playing games for a few hours. Learned a lot about each other and told each other stories, both good and bad. We lent the kind of advice that these good natured straight parents just donāt have the frame of reference for, and we talked about what we did for work and school, learned about what sports they play, suggested reading Tamora Pierce. Colored some protest posters too ā the kids came up with all the words on their own, stuff like āwere here whether you like it or not!ā
It is awful to think about all the BS that these children have had to go through already ā weird to think that we (the adult butches) know these stories of exclusion and hostility so VISCERALLY from our own and each otherās lives and childhoods, but hearing them come out of the mouth of a 10 year old girl is⦠something else. they have had to learn how to stand up for themselves, and theyāve got such thick skin now, but⦠most of us learn that so much later, or lose it as we leave childhood, and Iām so confident that at least THESE KIDS have a very real support system, parents who love them for who they are and want to encourage them to be happy and healthy even if it means life in the outside world will be harder. I dunno. I feel really hopeful.
this local woman who has a tomboy kid reached out to my butch group to see if a few of us wouldnāt mind having brunch with her family and a couple more of the girls tomboy friends, cuz she read that itās important for your development to have adult versions of āpeople like youā in your life when youāre growing up. which is definitely true. so weāre going over tomorrow. can you believe that? like, Iām gonna cry.
any idea what these guys are? We just got them in at work and i love them.
Fishy fish!

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One of the minor charming things about Kansas City these days is that you can buy local art from vending machines in the airport.
Iād never done it before but always wanted to so I bought these magnets before my flight back to NYC.
Keep reading
For a long time when I was younger, I had a bucket list item that went āspend an entire paycheck on a single item of really good clothing,ā but folks, let me tell you, as an adultā¦there is no feeling in the world quite like being able to put an entire paycheck into savings.
(My paychecks were also much smallerā¦like on the scale of making minimum wage in Georgia in 2002ā¦when I made that a goal, so in my defense, it was both more imaginable and more defensible at the time.)
Very important
Highly specific.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Coraline is a masterfully made film, an amazing piece of art that i would never ever ever show to a child oh my god are you kidding me
Nothing wrong with a good dose of sheer terror at a young age
āIt was a story, I learned when people began to read it, that children experienced as an adventure, but which gave adults nightmares. Itās the strangest book Iāve writtenā
-Neil Gaiman on Coraline
@nightlovechild
This is a legit psychology phenomenon tho like thereās a stop motion version of Alice and Wonderland that adults find viscerally horrifying, but children think is nbd. Itās like in that ātoy storyā period of development kids are all kind of high key convinced that their stuffed animals lead secret lives when theyāre not looking and that theyāre sleeping on top of a child-eating monster every night so they see a movie like Coraline and are just like āAh, yes. A validation of my normal everyday worldview. Same thing happened to me last Tuesday night. I told mommy and she just smiled and nodded.ā
Stephen King had this whole spiel i found really interesting about this phenomenon about how kids have like their own culture and their own literally a different way of viewing and interpreting the world with its own rules thatās like secret and removed from adult culture and that you just kinda forget ever existed as you grow up itās apparently why he writes about kids so much
An open-ended puzzle often gives parents math anxiety while their kids just happily play with it, explore, and learn. Iāve seen it so many times in math circles. We warn folks about it.
Neil Gaiman also said that the difference in reactions stems from the fact inĀ āCoralineā adults see a child in danger - while children see themselves facing danger and winning
i never saw so much push back from adults towards YA literature as when middle aged women started reading The Hunger Games. They were horrified that kids would be given such harsh stories, and I kept trying to point out the NECESSITY of confronting these hard issues in a safe fictional environment.
Also, in an interview, he said that Coraline was partially based on a story his not yet 6 year old daughter would tell himĀ
SAGAL: No. I mean, for example, your incredibly successful young adult novel āCoralineā is about a young girl in house in which thereās a hole in the wall that leads to a very mysterious and very evil world. So when you were a kid, is that what you imagined?
GAIMAN: When I was a kid, we actually lived in a house that had been divided in two at one point, which meant that one room in our house opened up onto a brick wall. And I was convinced all I had to do was just open it the right way and it wouldnāt be a brick wall. So Iād sidle over to the door and Iād pull it open.
(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Right.
GAIMAN: And it was always a brick wall.
SAGAL: Right.
GAIMAN: But it was one of those things that as I grew older, I carried it with me and I thought, I want to send somebody through that door. And when I came to write a story for my daughter Holly, at the time she was a 4 or 5-year-old girl. Sheād come home from nursery. Sheād seen me writing all day. So sheād come and climb on my lap and dictate stories to me. And itād always be about small girls named Holly.
SAGAL: Right.
GAIMAN: Who would come home to normally find their mother had been kidnapped by a witch and replaced by evil people who wanted to kill her and sheād have to go off and escape. And I thought, great, what a fun kid.
āFairy tales do not give the child his first idea of bogey. What fairy tales give the child is his first clear idea of the possible defeat of bogey. The baby has known the dragon intimately ever since he had an imagination. What the fairy tale provides for him is a St. George to kill the dragon.ā - G. K. Chesterton
How do you answer the question "Do you think they suffered?" I just saw my first emergency come in today and there was nothing we could do for the dog. He died before we could even give euthasol... So when someone asks if their pet suffered and it's likely that they did..what do you say?
When an animal has suffered and the owner asks me if this is the case, I may approach the situation in one of two ways.
If the animal suffered, and I have been telling the humans it is likely to suffer or actively suffering but they ignore my professional recommendations, deny treatment, or otherwise bury their head in the sand, I tell them that yes, it suffered. They do not get a free pass on their guilt from me to do that again.
If the human has earnestly tried to do everything right, then yes the animal likely did suffer, but you have done everything anyone ever could to minimize and prevent that.
I will not lie, that is one principle I cannot allow myself to compromise on, but I can deflect onto what I want that person to focus on. Either they allowed the animal to suffer, or they tried their very darnedest to stop that suffering.
Sometimes life isnāt fair, sometimes it canāt be changed. But we try to make it better. Thatās why weāre here.