(Old Blog)

that image of donald trump with the like, 4 dozen hamburgers is still the funniest thing in the world

Btw that rule about not trusting how you feel after 4pm in the winter or 9pm in the summer (really we should just say after the sun goes down but whatever) is only about negative feelings. if you are chilling with your best friend drinking hot chocolate and have never felt more loved and safe, that is 100% true and you can and should trust

took my car to the used car dealership today but they didn't have any money left to pay me with so they gave me a skeleton horse. i don't know if they can do that but they did so i have a skeleton horse now i guess.

lol i went to delete a twitter account for reasons (i ran a satire account of my university’s president) and it wouldn’t let me.

for reference: the time between “turn into musk parody account” and “suspended” was 8 minutes

this is a joke with no audience but I really wish there was a Wii U game that told you to look at the gamepad but then the gamepad just said "psyche" while simultaneously an enemy on the TV screen attacked you

adhd tip you can replace a “meal” with up to 3 hours of “the app” but watch out

okay done 👍 why am i hurts

Just ate an entire pear that was so good and so juicy i started gnawing on it with both hands like an animal and the face my supervisor made when he passed by my desk while I was absolutely consumed by my pear fueled bacchanal was Something i have never seen someone look so tired and also so upset and also also so envious

lol i went to delete a twitter account for reasons (i ran a satire account of my university’s president) and it wouldn’t let me.