damn girl. you ain’t had to do my man Arnold like that.
Why the Wendys girl gotta be like that
Because this ain’t burger king bitch Arnold can’t have it his way
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@m00ty
damn girl. you ain’t had to do my man Arnold like that.
Why the Wendys girl gotta be like that
Because this ain’t burger king bitch Arnold can’t have it his way

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“Sometimes we can’t find the thing that will make us happy, because we can’t let go of the thing that was supposed to.”
— Robert Brault
as a person with BPD, not having anyone to call a FP is sort of unbearably lonely and overwhelming
proud member of the never watched a james charles video club
gentle reminder
a lot of life is about taking a deep breath and continuing, even when you don’t want to and you’re tired; but you need to, so you can get to where you hope to be - you didn’t make it to today only to make it to today

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05/11/19
I smoke to cope with my emotions and illness. There’s something about this state of being and this music, it’s like a transcending feeling music. I feel like I’m partially in a state of tranquility as I’m trying to escape the pain of my emotions. I’m trying to endure it head on instead of trying to avoid them and seemingly punish those around me. I simply want everyone to have their best life. I want everyone to be happy yet I want my own happiness sometimes in things that can’t provide it. I want them to be happy even if it’s at my expense. But the selfish side of me, it yearns for any ounce of that happiness. It begs for it and feeds off of it and continues to want more and more to satisfy my inner self telling me I’m not worthy of love. It latches onto this desire and feeds off it, not letting it escape my thought if even for a moment. I try to desensitize myself to everything in an effort to escape the pain. You don’t understand because I want nothing more in the world than to see you happy. The catch is that I want to be the one making you happy. My fucked up attachment type yearns for wanting to know I make you happy. Part of me that feels these intense emotions makes me question whether I’m truly capable of love or if I’m always feeling such an intensity of emotion- if I ever really love at all and I’m just trying to feed into my psyche. Am I capable of love or just desire? I wonder if my emotions just form a facade of what is. I’ve never felt so lonely. I’m surrounding by people yet I feel like the only one in the room, all the time. I just wanted a second chance to try and love you again. I’m at my weakest where I don’t want to hurt, but this is the mountain of pain I failed to experience before. It’s filling my empty void and flowing through my pen until I’m left with nothing to feel. Months later I wonder if I will look back with regret. Goodnight self
anyway why is archery so fucking sexy
long distance murder
You wanna know the worst thing about BPD?
It’s being the person who comes with homework.
It’s meeting new people and trying to discern when is the appropriate time to start sharing info on your disorder, how much and where do you start.
It’s dating someone and falling for them and even with all of the fear and mistrust and inevitable hurt that comes along with it, knowing none of that compares to the fact that you’re gonna have to let them in on your world.
It’s loving someone and asking them to love you back despite how difficult you know you are.
It’s trying to work in books and videos and any information you can so that they’ll understand you that little bit better.
It’s fearing that they don’t want to learn.
But most of all, it’s feeling like a complete and utter burden. Who comes with homework? If you want a happy relationship with me you’re gonna have to gain in depth knowledge of a very complex mental disorder. If you want to keep me feeling happy and safe you’re gonna have to make adjustments to ensure that.
I want to be loved. But I feel like I’m punishing those I love by merely existing. I’m sorry I couldn’t be easy.
Theo <3
BBQ
blease be quiet

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quality
I’m actually laughing really hard
my kink is when ppl actually care abt my feelings & what I have to say
too unrealistic, settle for bondage like the rest of us
There’s no reason for anyone over the age of 21 to be having a conversation with anyone under the age of 18
“For the last time son, I wont talk to you.”
“im sorry students, but this is the last time im gonna say this. Stop trying to talk to me”
“I’m afraid I can’t hire you, I cannot speak to you.”
“I would tell that kid to get off my lawn, but society isn’t ready yet”
“my new born baby just said it’s first word but I’m not trying to hear that”
“hello 911?!? help my parents are in a burnin build-”
“i dunnoo kid….you sound just a little young and….idk…. im not really feelin too comfortable with this” *hangs up*
i basically assume that people don’t like me unless they explicitly tell me they like me and then periodically remind me

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professor: *teaches 5 chapters in a 50 minute class* Does everyone understand?
me: