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nappesworld

bathtubbarrister

that’s some damn tea

greyhairedgeekgirl

If extending a right to all people reduces your rights in any way? That means that right has been dependent on the oppression of someone else.

It means you’ve been profiting from the subjugation of others in some way. Are you good with that?

mjalti

somespicyshrimp

me at 14: like maybe im a lil gay but i’m not gonna let that define me im so much more than my sexuality like i can be straight if i try really hard

me now:

lylahlove24

MEEEEEEEEEEEE

the-movemnt-deactivated20170912

This is white privilege at work (x) | follow @the-movemnt

CORRECTION: Chase Legleitner spent two years in a county jail, not a state prison.

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jessiejjones

no more ‘vampires who correct history books’

more vampires who don’t remember more vampires saying ‘i don’t fucking know man, google it’ more vampires not remembering important historical figures more vampires not recalling centuries worth of history more vampires saying ‘ that was at least 300 years ago, how the FUCK could i remember that detail?’ more vampires whose brains work like human brains

acertainmaybe

More vampires who 300 years later can’t remember what was the truth and what was the lie they told to get out of trouble.

More vampires who are like, “I don’t know, man, I spent most of that decade in an opium den.”

More vampires who weren’t paying attention because they didn’t think it would be important.

More vampires who don’t know because there was lot of conflicting gossip and they don’t want to point any fingers.

More vampires who are just bad at dates. “Back in 1620, or was it 1645, wait, what year is it now?”

More vampires who were on a totally different continent when it happened, so get off their back and stop asking them questions already.

therainingkiwi

YES to all of this but also consider: vampires who only remember the most trivial stuff.

“Oh yeah, the only thing I remember about the American Revolution was this nice candlemaker I met sometime, and she was wearing this really cute red shawl…”

“Uhhh I don’t remember much about the fall of Rome but there was this one fucking cobblestone right outside the coliseum…”

mothmo

Also consider: vampires who realize three or four hundred years after the fact that they knew someone famous.

Just sits up in bed one night screaming “THAT WAS GEORGE GODDAMN WASHINGTON”

what-even-is-thiss

*vampire wakes up his girlfriend in the middle of the night*

“Stacy. Hey, hey Stacy.”

“Wh- Eric, what now?”

“I just realized that I missed the entire Islamic golden age.”

“Wh- what?”

“I missed it, Stacy. The whole thing. I was lost in a forest the whole time. I was so lost.”

“Eric, I’m trying to sleep.”

“Stacy they… listen here, Stacy. I missed the invention of the number zero. Stacy, Stacy I’m freaking out.”

ourstrangeduet

Men are bus schedules

quadriceps-deactivated20171230

how

ourstrangeduet

Always lying

tinderventure

Said I needed a date to formal in my bio, and got this priceless response.

soundoflaughter85-deactivated20

Reading this I thought it was going to be a Trump spoof. Still can’t tell if it’s supposed to be?

lylahlove24

This is the most precious and clever thing I have ever seen in my life. ❤️

shitmensaytome

My husband told his youngest sister never to get married “because it’s hell.”

I was standing right there.

lylahlove24

I hope he’s poster’s ex-husband now. Or at least that he apologized.

Has anyone else ever noticed that an infant crying kinda sounds like a dirt bike accelerating? Am I crazy?

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traveler-in-the-world

lylahlove24

That cat is my sick ass right now

funny-thoughts

Getting shot in the foot would hurt more than getting shot in the head.

lylahlove24

Depends on where the bullet lands.

funny-thoughts

Pregnancy is a result of one of two things: Successful unprotected sex, or unsuccessful protected sex.

lylahlove24

Or rape. Js

funny-thoughts

Our lockers in high school were probably more secure than most of our current passwords.

lylahlove24

Yet my account has never been hacked but my favorite bra was stolen from my locker.

birdsarecommunists

Cute music terms to name your children:

Viola

Harmony

Melody

Cadence

Carol

Hymn

Celeste

Clef

Agitato

Oboe Player

F Sharp

♮

Barbaro

Plagal

Smorzando

ii♭ 6-4

Canon in inversion and augmentation

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Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

nyctosaurid

“if goofy is a dog and pluto is a dog why is one a pet” is the cartoon equivalent of “if man evolved from monkeys why are there still monkeys”

zagreus

The implication that Goofy is just a more advanced stage in canine evolution is oddly terrifying somehow

nyctosaurid

theres no such thing as ‘more advance’ in evolution. a dogman isnt more evolved than a dog, just as you are no more evolved than an seagull or coral, they are just fitted for different environments and have evolved as such

dimetrodone

Goofy is not more evolved the Pluto, Goofy just fills a different ecological niche. While Pluto is just a scavenger and Goofy is an apex predator both play important roles in the ecosystem.

thekingmickey-deactivated202404

chlstarrbaby

Goofy’s a domestic dog, Pluto is a real one.

nyctosaurid

“Why me? I’m domesticated!” is the deepest rabbit hole of a line in the entire disney canon

Hi, yes. This is me. I feel beautiful, so I’m sharing <3

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