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@chlstarrbaby

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Tumblr Sexyman Contest 2026 Final Round
Senshi (Dungeon Meshi)
Ryland Grace (Project Hail Mary)
Mr. Ant Tenna (Deltarune)
Tenna art by @9Aaaalt29 on twt
“And if you’ll give me 40% of the MOST POPULAR VOTE, I’ll give you my SPECIAL REWARD... A year’s supply of NON-GLOOBY SLIME!!! Never or BARELY used!!!” Tenna concluded his speech with a huge smile, jetting his hands up in double peace signs.
The crowd roared in confused enthusiasm as Tenna gave a gracious flurry of low-FPS bows, pausing only for the occasional stink-nose at his audience plants who weren’t throwing enough 3D roses.
Eventually, the room fell silent. It was Senshi’s turn to speak.
He puffed out his chest, took a long, sweeping look over the audience… and shook his head.
“I can see not all of you are eating properly.”
The crowd murmured with embarrassment.
“I don’t know who needs to hear this, but it’s time to take the turkey out of your icebox. I have seen the ingenious technology with which your people store food... and I have also seen the waste which results from such convenience.
“The food you take had a life. Beasts grew fat on the grass of the field, plants grew from the sun’s rays, and mushrooms grew from minerals in the cracks of caves. And yet, it sits in your iceboxes, collecting moisture until it perishes.
“Eat what is given to you. Because its life will make you stronger, too.”
Without another word, Senshi left his podium and stepped away from the stage. The crowd murmured in confusion. “Is he really like that?” somebody said. “I only remember reblogging the photosets of him tripping and showing ass.”
--
Back in the Green Room, Tenna wrung his antennas nervously.
“Y-y-you think they liked me!? They HAD to!! I mean, I don’t know what Asgore was thinking, getting that weird haircut and running that food waste campaign, but… YOU thought I did good, didn’t you, Kris?”
Laios nodded aggressively, a streak of blue face paint peeling from his forehead.
“You did AMAZING, Tenna! By the way, now that we’ve seen all your insider campaign secrets, do you have any more videos of Susie? Especially her tail... If I could get a look at that, I could finally tell if she’s a dinosaur or --”
THWACK. Fake antlers butted Laios’s head.
“LAIOS?? Weren’t we dressed up to help SENSHI???” Marcille hissed, gesturing awkwardly with her hooves.
Suddenly, Tenna turned to the two adventurers.
“Hey, WAIT a second. SOMETHING’s not right here...”
Laios and Marcille held their breath.
“Where the heck are my POINTS!?”
Just then, the door opened. Chilchuck took one step into the room, whistling and holding a large bag.
Everyone turned to him.
Chilchuck paused, took a step backwards, and closed the door.
“CHILCHUCK!!!” yelled Tenna.
“How come Chilchuck got to stay Chilchuck!?” yelled Marcille at the same time.
--
Meanwhile, in outer space somewhere, some guy was making out with a rock.
tumblr won't let me reblog with a video, but 10 months later here is what I mean:
IT SOUNDS SO GOOD???
Geneaology of the Tribe of Ancients
Link to other version because tumblr compression is bad: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/323691187582009347/1145104935860588728/image.png
A family tree I put together of all the confirmed members of the Tribe of Ancients from Super Paper Mario, as well as the Tribe of Darkness, which split off at some point in the past. Most of this is explicitly confirmed in-game, with the only true inferences being regarding the Tribe of Darkness.
I put it here that the Tribe of Darkness was founded by the man who defeated the Pixl Queen and is said to have hidden the Dark Prognosticus. The Tribe of Darkness is similarly said to have hidden the book and in the present it is generally considered hidden by "someone".
The other point of inference is the defeater of the Pixl Queen being a descendant of the son of the magician who made the Pixls in the first place. This is based on the fact that this son is said to have survived an accident that was otherwise fatal, and a point is made to mention his ultimate fate is mysterious, indicating there is more significance to it.
"I love you , I'm glad we're friends"

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legit the best advice i can give you: feed your friends
any time someone is in any kind of crisis or upheaval, offer to feed them. tell them they don't have to choose what it is if they can't make decisions, just ask about allergies and preferences and tell them you're just gonna make food happen at their house.
friend having a baby? delivery gift certificate to order food to the hospital after the kid shows up.
someone's relative passes away? offer to make them dinner.
buddy gets laid off? ask if you can order them lunch.
pal stuck in a depressive episode? offer to drive them to fucking mcdonalds, if that's what they want.
people in crisis are tired and sad and angry and the last thing most of them are doing is thinking about feeding themselves. so if you have the ability or time or money, providing that is always, always a good move.
legit i do this all the time, and it is 100% always appreciated. i have taught all my friends that when something happens, we feed each other. it makes people feel extremely cared for, and I cannot recommend it enough.
Right after I reblogged this I found out a friends’ mom was hospitalized — this is such a good reminder
If you can, provide disposable plates/utensils and save them from doing dishes — when my husband was diagnosed with cancer, bulk paper products were our most appreciated gift
CONGRATULATIONS! THE MOST TUMBLR, THE MOST SEXYMAN 2026!
I notice that, in the Mario movies, during the two times the bros are protecting a large swath of people, Mario leads the charge while Luigi goes off on his own to protect stragglers.
I like the consistent pattern that while Mario spearheads the acts of heroism, Luigi has a particular softness for those who are at risk of being left behind.
THATS OUR MAN!!!!!!!!!
my friend keeps sending the groupchat voice notes of her eating bussy and calling it "asmr"..... bro go study for your physics exam 😭
hi sorry uh. incredible miscommunication on my part lmfao.
my bad yall

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happy belated birthday blue rat
tails will put your ass on blast dont even doubt
it IS monday. Let's get it on cunts
it IS tuesday. We still must get it on cunts
it IS wednesday. cunts you know what we must do. it's time to get it on
GET UP CUNT. IT IS THURSDAY.
JUST A LITTLE MORE TO GO IT'S FRIDAY CUNTS GET THE FUCK UP!
Everyone spun masterfully!
acting all humble like he wasn't just begging and crying for it
Kawkaw wants to play!

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Hero of Time
let’s smile again