Tales and Rantings of a Showghoul

Oh, a human being is seeking a social response? Human being, the social animal wired to make and track social connection? A human desires the vital blood that permitted their species to survive for millennia? The human being who was born completely helpless and primed in every way by nature to seek attention and help from their community?

“white men can’t be oppressed” -> gay men

“heterosexual men can’t be oppressed” -> trans men

“cis-het men can’t be oppressed” -> intersex men

“perisex men can’t be oppressed” -> disabled men

“able-bodied men can’t be oppressed” -> neurodivergent men

“cis-het perisex white able-bodied neurotypical men can’t be oppressed” -> buddy let me tell you about wealth and class and homelessness and immigrants and minority languages and cultures and being a child and being an elderly person and and and

park ranger who has seen people spread bacon grease on their campsite in the hopes of seeing a bear

British person who is appalled that North American national parks kill people

people who lure bison calves away from their mothers to photograph them

a lot of it involves bison

a LOT of it involves people trying to swim in the yellowstone thermal vents

woman who tried to retrieve her dropped cell phone from a pit toilet and FELL IN

Lots of people reminding me that caves are a problem too. I know, I just try to forget that caves exist because I hate them.

Guys who tried to hike the entire length of Florida in flip flops

Someone who approached a bear cub because they thought it was a raccoon

Someone who works at an unspecified national monument and says dead bodies keep turning up at the picnic area (Hello???)

A few Alaskans laughing at everyone

Scottish person who wishes their parks were as effective at killing tourists as ours are

A few NPS staffmembers saying the NPS is far, far too incompetent to wage any sort of large scale conspiracy about disappearances

Several death threats against David Paulides

People accusing me of being Bigfoot (I plead the fifth)

A group who got on a raft in a river assuming it would loop back around... like at a waterpark

Person recalling a time they saw a hiker "saved by monkeys" but did not elaborate on that