“I actually got the J&J” 🤣

This is the content I get on tumblr for

Reverse werewolf- turn into the moon when you see a wolf.

you. I don’t like you.

me and the lads getting fancy in the bog

What’s happening on Twitter? 😂

Love smash mouth

What’s going on this year

LMAO He just said he does

LMAO reblogging again because of 5he sass from dictionary.com 😂😂

Y'all know when you get wrecked by the damn dictionary you’re a fool

Never Forget 😂

The best fucking post on here

IT’S BACK

MR THE ROCK JOHNSON

That last bit hit me so hard I pulled a fucking muscle in my neck holy shit

😭😭 literally laughed out loud

heye every one.

i have on important announcemen t to make.

dc even got the clown and everything

for real, though, why do recipes consistently tell you to use less herbs and spices in than you should. fuck your “two cloves of garlic,” fuck your “half teaspoon of cinnamon,” and you can absolutely go to hell with your “dash of black pepper”

I’m pretty sure that the only time I’ve ever actually managed to overseason food was when working with balsamic vinegar, which is the most overpowering motherfucker of a sauce known to man

i appreciate the energy and anger in this post, which is righteous and just

A friend once tried to replicate my burrito bowl recipe from the same online link I used and was upset it didn’t come out as flavorful, so I had to tell him to imagine that every online recipe is written by a midwestern white lady who thinks ketchup is spicy and adjust the spices accordingly. He nailed those burrito bowls next time.

“imagine that every online recipe is written by a midwestern white lady who thinks ketchup is spicy and adjust the spices accordingly“

@legendairycow

#good news: this is how you make more of them and it doesn’t hurt them#bad news: i checked the tags to see if that had been said and someone called this ‘grinch meat’#and now i want to crawl into a hole (x)

Ah! A cleansing sense of whiplash