sweet, mourning lamb

it blew my vagina clean off its hinges

This is what it’s like to allow mobile games to notify you

"dont smoke around your pets" okay well i dont even smoke im asthmatic. my dog smokes bc she needs to fucking chill sometimes and Yeah i light them for her Obviously bc she cant use a lighter. i dont get anyrhing out of this arrangment and i resent the implication. in fact shes giving ME secondhand smoke. so my question is why are you so hateful and jugemental and acting like an asshole to me making presumptions and shit about my life.

What. What. What. What.

im gonna pop some.tag

stop trying to suck me off i'm not done telling jokes

1 more smackarel of honey I'm not driving

boys like it when you imprison them in the ornate birdcage that hangs in the centre of your lair

I don’t like being referred to as a boy

Woah mama I'll give anyone who misgenders you the Elvis Special (a bullet)

This account likely makes the list of “the last accounts I’d ever expect to be anywhere near my blog” but I appreciate it

Woah mama I'm one of your mutuals

WHAT

Woah mama I've been calligraphied