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I’m gonna try to explain my point through examples.

Ex 1: toddler screaming and crying in the walmart

Punishment: I’m going to spank you or embarrass you or yell at you! Shut up! I’ll give you something to cry about!

Discipline: stop doing what you’re doing because it isn’t productive and it disturbs others as well as increasing your own upsetnes. I’m going to take you out of the environment that’s upsetting you until you’re calm and we can identify what upset you together so I can explain to you why it’s like that/help you find ways to productively express upsetness as you grow.

Ex 2: your teen is failing, like, all their classes

Punishment: you’re grounded! You’re not allowed to go out with your friends or play games or do anything fun or enjoyable until your work is satisfactory!

Discipline: it’s important to do well in school. You need to communicate with me when you are struggling so I can help you. You also need to learn to manage fun stuff and work as that’s an important life skill in adulthood. I’m going to monitor your work more closely so I can help you find that balance. And if this is a deeper mental or emotional issue, we can seek help for you together.