show us god's tits

cunningly avoiding tooth decay by going to bed with a single square of chocolate on my tongue for the bacteria to snack on instead of my teeth

Fun fact! The bacteria in your mouth dont eat your enamel! They only eat sugars and such. The stuff that eats your enamel is the byproduct produced by the digestive process of the bacteria. In other words, the thing that causes tooth decay is the bacteria’s equivalent of shit, not the bacteria themselves!

cunningly avoiding tooth decay by going to bed with a single piece of toilet paper on my tongue for the bacteria to wipe their ass on instead of my teeth

i hope this email finds you a broken husk of a man

If u ever wanna hit on me pls be obvious I am stupid.

finding the balance between allowing myself to feel my feelings but not letting myself wallow in them is difficult but boy am i trying

not to like make a huge fucking post about shit that’s been talked to death but it really genuinely scares me how many straight girls think it’s normal to just… not like your partner. like they think it’s normal and okay for their boyfriends to openly think they’re stupid and annoying and to be totally derisive about their interests and for them not to be friends or have things in common or enjoy each other’s personalities or encourage their interests? you are supposed to be friends with the person you’re in love with. you are supposed to want to talk to them about the things that make them happy. you do not have to settle for people who treat your entire personality as a burden outside of what you do to cater to them.

Gimme dat shit

i LOVE BEING IN BED !!!!!! i love being all cuddly and warm and curling up into a ball and feeling tiny !!!!! this is what life’s about !!!!!!!!!!!