lotus! I need some of your favourite 14/river fics, or honestly any of your favourite river/doctor fics!! I wanna get into my hyperfixation again in time for the Christmas special!
Ana 💕
You, Ana, have opened the pandoras box (aka my bookmarks) with this ask. This could become a bit long because a. I am a chatterbox, and b. I have little to no idea what your fic preferences are, so I'll just recommend you a bunch and hope that my taste in fics at least vaguely aligns with yours. Here we go:
*= Smut
°= Fix it
14 x River:
*This phantom life sharpens like an image (but it sharpens like a knive) This is the perfect fic. It isn't finished yet, and I'm honestly not sure anymore if it's a fix it or not, but it is great.
°In thee I delight A sweet little outsider!pov fic. Just something nice for the soul.
°It must be light wherever you are More of a multi-Doctor fic really (not at once), but there's some fourteen at the end.
13 x River:
°I'm Alive A short trilogy for when you need something funny and sweet.
°Love is not an emotion, it's a promise Again, multiple Doctors, but mainly 13. The Doctor refers to River as their 'little goddess'.
°5 Times The Doctor Talked About River Song With Graham (+1 Time The Fam Finally Met Her) It's in the title really. Very emotional. (Not as in sad necessarily, there are simply a lot of emotions).
°i am the distance you put between all of the moments that we will be Very lovely fic. Angstier than I thought tbh. So definetly something for when you want pain and longing. Has a happy ending though.
°You Know Who You Are and Yes You're Gonna Break Down This one's fun. They flirt, they dance, the Doctor's being gay... a bit of angst towards the end, but it gets resolved rather swiftly.
Of Handcuffs and Custard Creams Pure hilarity for when you need something to laugh about.
°she's got a smile that heals me Fix it happiness with a dash of angst and yearning, very sweet.
understanding I'm not sure how to describe this one. It is not necessarily Yaz bashing, it's just a lot of unrequited love. Very nice for when you're feeling vindictive after having to guess on every second fic on whether or not they're going to have the Doctors and Rivers marriage be open to sprinkle in some thasmin.
12 x River:
she blows out of nowhere, roman candle of the wild Human Au. Twelve is stood up on a date and River saves him. Banter and love at first sight ensure.
The Playwright and his muse Human Au. Twelve is a playwright in victorian(?) England, River Melody becomes his muse. A beautiful trilogy.
*But she prefers two lumps of sugar and tea Human Au. Twelve is the most grumpy barista that the world has ever seen, River does not put up with it. He immediatly falls in love, yet continues to be an idiot.
°Are we dancing after death, you and I? River gave the Doctor her regeneration energy, he becomes downright addicted. Angst, yearning, sweetness.
°I use the stars to find you This is just fluff and sapiness and domesticity. Like a long, warm, comforting hug.
*And if I get burned, at least we were electrified Sweet, hot smut. Twelve grows a beard.
*The voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses River has a praise kink. Very hot, and more emotional than it sounds. (Again, emotional does not mean sad. It just means... emotional).
Writing between the lines Have you ever wondered what elevens regeneration would've been like with River around? Well, wonder no longer! Here it is.
11 x River:
*°And all in war with Time for love of you The very first Doctorriver fic I ever read. A beautiful fix-it fic.
*though my eyes stare inward now at where you were Such a great fic. I won't spoil much because the riddle of it all is half the fun the first time around (for me it was, at least).
°Hold infinity in the palm of your hand The Doctor and River post dying. Very fun, very sweet. They're just so married (literally).
*heart swells like water A rewrite (or write along?) of 'Day of the moon' that fills in all the smutty gaps.
gazing into the abyss The Doctor has the last of the Mr. Clever residues fucked out of him by River. Very hot. River literally manages to seduce a robot. Not that we ever doubted her capability to do that.
To force them apart This might very well not be your cup of tea. I have a weakness for dark!Doctorriver.
°moved from day into night to be near you Steven Moffat had a very specific vision of how he wanted River and the Doctors story to end completly. This vision is sadly not canon. This vision is this fic.
Sharing Names This fic is amazing. It forever ingrained the headcanon in me that time lord names are telepathic.
Accomplice A fun little drabble. Hints of dark!Doctorriver.
a love that even time will lie down and be still for This one is so sweet! The Doctor is everything little Mels wanted in a partner.
and i'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways Human AU. River is very much in love with one John Smith. This one has a bit of everything. Fluff, flirting, angst...
10 x River:
*competition This one's a (very hot) revenge on the Doctorrose shippers who put works in the Doctorriver tags that are very mean to River. Maybe not your cup of tea.
9 x River:
°*Where I've been It's been a while since I've read this one, but I remember that it was incredible, so there's that.
Worth living for River helps the Doctor heal after the time war. Very sweet, if I remember correctly.
Multi-Doctor x River:
All in Your Head There are three Doctors (+ companions) in the TARDIS at once. River decides to be a telepathic tease. Very, very funny.
°Glad We're Here This is one of the funniest fics I've ever read. There are two Doctors (technically three, but thirteen misses the main action) and two Rivers. Lot's of timey wimey shenanigans ensue. It is so funny.
°*There is a love I reminisce This fic is wonderful. It includes eleven and eight and mentions a lot of the Doctorriver encounters featured in the audioplays. I'll admit, the ending somewhat confuses me, but that's probably nothing that couldn't be fixed with a reread. Lots of timey-wimey stuff.
Energy for a lot of words, but not for a long story (Oneshot collections):
The myth of us never ends 100 stories
You taught me how to love when nobody ever could 15 stories
It's called Marriage, Honey 70 stories
Recommended Authors for even more fics:
Del (godessdel) Their writing is just beautiful. Everything they write is so beautiful.
flowingtune Has great story ideas. Also writes lots of thoschody, if that is your jam. Lots of timetots.
melodypond_thewomanwhomarriedme (sexymonk) Has lots of fun stories and Au's.
HellNHighHeels I had one fic of the bookmarked and just checked them out to see if I should put them on the list. I haven't read much of them, but their stories sound like great fun.
TheWifeofRiverSong If you ever feel like reading the hottest smut, they're the author for you.
hihoplastic Their fics are good. I never noticed just how many Doctorriver fics of theirs I have in my bookmarks until now.
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i have been shaving my head for several months now and im an old hand at most of the weirdness that comes with it. ive seen so many strange things - a beanie torn in half after i tried brute force yanking it off my stubble, strangers hands gripping my head like a sort of fleshy bowling ball, c-beams glittering in the dark by the tanhauser gate.
but still, sometimes, things surprise me. and i was surprised today. because today an old man approached me at the park. and he said, you know, im a pediatrician.
which is already a weird start to a conversation, because i didnt know that. and maybe i should have just rolled with it, but instead i went
wait. i dont know that. why did you think i knew that?
which didn't even put him slightly off balance.
cuz you're bald, he said, so confidently that i didnt even question it until the conversation was over. now. i was - i was over there, sitting -
and he gestured across the park to a giant pile of soft dirt that had an almost cartoonishly exaggerated ass print on it which derailed me for the second time. right? because whoever sat on that dirt, clearly, had an ass like two coconuts being fired out of a spanish cannon. whereas this man had an ass that could probably only be detected with powerful scientific instruments. i told him this in more succint terms by simply saying that was clearly not his buttprint.
now at this point we'd gotten derailed twice, and as unflappable as he'd been the first time, he was starting to get a little defensive. so he said perhaps someone with a large butt sat down after i got up, and i said why are you lying about where you were sitting, and he said why would i do that? and i said if i knew, i wouldnt be asking, and he said fine, i was driving by - and i said why didn't you just say you were driving by?!?!?!?! and he said because i didn't want you to think i was the kind of crazy person that would just stop his car to tell a stranger in a park that he, as a pediatrician, could tell that your parents REALLY cared about tummy time!
then he left. angrily. he actually stomped back to his car. i dont know when i started laughing but i didnt stop until i got home. my voice is still all scratchy right now. ive been in a little bit of a writing funk but i had to get this down while i could still remember it so perfectly.
and as a tangent, i cannot emphasize enough the benefits of going outside and interacting with the public. it is a constant source of joy. every place on earth is the weirdest place on earth. i will never be able to write a character as fascinating as the people i run into at the park. but god help me, i have to try.
(The name flying pig/feizhu飞猪 is inspired by Nezha’s mount the Wind-Fire Wheels. In the animated film, the Wind-Fire Wheels normally take the form of a flying pig.)
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painted with acrylic gouache and every shade of green paint marker i got lying around :^) painted on the mat frame too and it came out better than i thought!
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Nearly pissed myself laughing earlier when I saw this absolute Looney Tunes truck attempting to transport an oversized mattress down the road with only a couple tiny bungee cords holding on for dear life, while it ballooned out behind the truck like a drag racing parachute:
“The LEGO Movie was my favorite movie of 2014, but it strikes me that the main character was male, because I feel like in our current culture, he HAD to be. The whole point of Emmett is that he’s the most boring average person in the world. It’s impossible to imagine a female character playing that role, because according to our pop culture, if she’s female she’s already SOMEthing, because she’s not male. The baseline is male. The average person is male. You can see this all over but it’s weirdly prevalent in children’s entertainment. Why are almost all of the muppets dudes, except for Miss Piggy, who’s a parody of femininity? Why do all of the Despicable Me minions, genderless blobs, have boy names? I love the story (which I read on Wikipedia) that when the director of The Brave Little Toaster cast a woman to play the toaster, one of the guys on the crew was so mad he stormed out of the room. Because he thought the toaster was a man. A TOASTER. The character is a toaster. I try to think about that when writing new characters— is there anything inherently gendered about what this character is doing? Or is it a toaster?”
— Bojack Horseman creator Raphael Bob-Waksberg commenting on how weird gendered defaults in entertainment are, and why we should think twice about them. Excerpted from this longer original post.
(via 360degreesasthecrowflies)
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anon hater just accused me of (among other things) "encouraging kids to install malware on their parents' computers". I don't remember ever doing that but it sounded like a fun concept for a post so here are some ideas for things to install on your parents' computers!
a custom DNS resolver that blocks access to Fox News and other right-wing propaganda outlets
a keylogger to capture the admin password for your router so you can disable parental controls
a VPN or a virtual machine running the Tor browser to bypass access restrictions and age verification checks
your own "parental controls" browser extension, set up to send you notifications if your parents visit websites that indicate they might be spying on you (e.g. Life360)
a userscript that adds a fake virus warning popup to the donation pages of fascist political parties
have fun! make sure to do loads of reading and learn how things work so you can break them safely and effectively!
oh, and anon, my advice to you is never stab a man who collects knives
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