oh shit the trout population :(

If they are careful about their identities I don't think they need to hide the bodies. I mean who's going to think a bunch of teens from a different universe came and kill- what, like 30+ people??? Especially with the obvious alien technology they're using and access to such a high tech hacker.

I don't know how many humans were actually responsible for killing bay!Ratchet and on principle I refuse to watch the movie. So I'm assuming there were a couple of government officials that ordered the attack, the generals in charge of it, and then the people who were actively involved in his death. So I'm going with the 30-50 range on the amount of guilty humans.

Anyways the fic would be pretty dark in theory but it's written completely covered in a thick layer of crack and humour so it's not so bad! I mean of course some horrific stuff is going to shine through but that makes sense considering the subject matter.

As such I present to you: Jackson 'Jack' Darby as Lance McClain, Blue Paladin of Voltron AU.

After the Autobots returned to Cybertron, Jack tries to retain that sense of Space and adventure, yearning to meet them again. Agent Walter gets him into the Garrison, requiring a fake ID if he doesn't want them to realise he's a special case - which he doesn't want. Though he wonders how Iverson would react to knowing his background when 'the only reason he was admitted into fighter jet was because the best pilot in their class had a disciplinary issue and flunked out'. Yes, he's got the line down pat, the man says it often enough.

He thought the alien war had ended with the Autobots and Deceptions; apparently he was mistaken. Where before it was cybertronic life forms fighting over resources (mostly), there was a civil war that dragged out against what was effectively furrys, the Galra were even older than the feud back on earth and far beyond the level of 'war' as he's known it to exist... Depends if they have a deity of destruction capable of terra-forming a planet and appearing as earth titans. They got the mystery aspect already, with Voltron and quintessence.

He could've hoped for a better team though. Keith sometimes reminded him of Miko, but at least she was more annoying than stabbing on contact. Shirt had his work and trauma cut out for him, at least that's something he knows how to handle from watching Arcee, Ratchet and Optimus. He honestly can't handle Allura though -- was royalty like this? He'd been a child -teen- soldier, but the rest of them had been cadets with no prior exposure and now they're all with shallow support systems to fall back on (nevermind the whole Holt-fiasco Pidge has going on.)

....

It just so happens that Allura found Cybertron and decided to propose an alliance. Lance debated wether he should tell them the Galra and Lions (why were they both feline?) weren't the only visitors earth had and decides it's high-time he tells them he's friends with them, but he ends up getting shot down for 'bad/ inappropriate jokes'. He raises his hands in the air, acquiescing to their dismissive reaction since he's far more eager to meet Arcee, Bee, Bulkhead, Ratchet and more than to correct their opinion.

Lance goes to meet them in classic clothes, without his armor, since he 'doesn't want to come off as aggressive' unlike the rest who, come what he may hint at, still follow Altea's thousands of years old data on their races society - slaves, war, etc. Something he knows best will not be received well. At all. He's also partially expecting Allura or one of the others, bets on Pidge, to go on about their Hierarchy system and slavery - which, he gets it, honestly, knowing her own situation, but that'll rather serve to sever any prospective alliance than 'revolutionize their society'. So it's gonna be bad, as the Cybertronians have technology surpassing even the Galras on kriffing space bridges. Shame too, as it would stop the overreliance on Allura to input coordinates and their allies could use it as well to offer assistance in a snap.

So when they enter Cybertrons gravitational pull Lance is the only one not up-to-snuff, dressed in his old clothes who were newly synthesized by the Castle's repair systems. Arcee is bound to get a visual alert on the similarities, at least. If she's not too busy to meet him. Ratchet should be there though, he'd received the transmission. But he hopes to see the femme again. He'd missed her and their rides around Nevada a lot. He'd been her charge, she'd seen most of his wardrobe in the span of -give or take- 5 years and thus bound to recognize him from any angle. She was there, probably as backup or guard and, as while Voltron's heads were talking politics -thank Primus Wheeljack's not here for that- they were subtly scanned for weapons and threats. He kept an eye on her, which her optics picked up on and when she turned to Lance she stared. For a good few doboshes neither blinked, before a hopeful expression grew on her face. Thank Primus she recognized him! Actually, so did Bumblebee and Bulkhead who, while not as quick to notice as Arcee, did have a memory file pop up at the sound of his voice: It was a done deal when he told Pidge off and Keith to stop running off, the same way he'd do with Miko when she (again) ran straight into blaster fire or portals.

If only she could see him now, she'd see the irony of it.

Ratchet was surprised at the foreign contact before he was pleased, an offer for an alliance to stop a tyranny would be the distraction some of them needed and a fresh start for Cybertrons dark past. Then he was slightly concerned as they came to meet them with weapons, stating they themselves are armed. Also, what are humans doing here?? What is the Altean expecting of them, not lose an arm? Be legendary warriors like Optimus?? Hah! They were friendly compared to other species in their galaxy, having disengaged the automatic target system for their blasters!! When the princess came into the picture, proudly stating that they were aware of the risks and willing to fight to the death for their cause he was so fragging pissed at her he wished he had a larger exhaust pipe to blow off steam.

"By the Allspark- have you no shame in sending a species not even into adulthood to fight your war at the front lines!?"

"Jack, I thought you were more responsible than that." Arcee starts. Ratchet momentarily lags, blinking his optics at the human clad in a dark blue turtleneck and pants. He barely looks like he's aged.. oh, don't tell him Miko is hiding somewhere too.

"I am. You're looking at the one and only multi-talented sniper of Voltron." He looked at Bumblebee whilst his old guardian was still looking pissed but at least she was joining Ratchet on grilling Allura instead of his morals. The femme had always been his inspiration for angry power-walks and she proved that, stomping so close he worried she'd step on her before letting all of Cybertrons hear her rage.

Wisely, from.experience, he opts out of listening to that and focuses on the scout "...Yeah, it really helped that you taught us some of your tricks as a scout way back then. Didn't think I'd need it after we... thank Primus for that, really."

The yellow cameron let out a string of beeps, not using his radio. Perhaps for old time's sake, he's feeling nostalgic too, seeing them again. The high chirps and deep rumble takes him longer to translate than Raf would, but he also knows how the other thinks, so he makes a pretty educated guess.

"Raf and Miko are fine, last I video chatted with them - a year or so ago. Raf was graduating from some fancy science school in Arizona, aiming to get into State Security, maybe Satellite Scanners legally." The Autobot was listening intently, so he can safely assume he hit the hammer in the head. Actually, looking at the scout reminded him: "He also remade his own yellow car; it's got AI and spy cams. He really misses you buddy. He managed to keep the feed from the base saved on his laptop. We watched them like, every month after you were gone. Miko actually made a mixtape out of the funniest moments - kinda like a video documentary."

He looks at the Wrecker that's been keeping watch on the other paladins, Keith in particular was receiving Knockouts -the red sports car, medic and ex-decepticons- attention. "Miko is working her way up the music industry, though as a Voice actor right now. She's getting pretty popular and working on getting support for solo albums. And, cause we know Miko, she's also doing parkour. It reminds her of our adventures.

We missed you all pretty bad."

A digit picked him up and Hunk yelled out for him, fearful as Keith drew his sword and tried hacking it at his capturers pede. It was Ratchet, who took a pause in denoting Allura's self-esteem from Royal know-it-better to galactic fuck-up her father would cast from his presence. He also gave Keith the 'this is clearly not working, are you dumb' look. Also a memorable sight from Earth.

Everyone wants a little excitement from time to time. Why not? Our lives are boring beyond belief otherwise, surely a bit of relieve and change from our usual life is warranted.

While the majority of us would readily agree with that sentiment, some others do not. They'd rather appreciate some peace and quiet away from the adrenaline that lights their frazzled nerves and has hairs stand up in alert. For those living on the edge, having a day that follows their expectations would be considered a holiday.

Miko Nakadai would likely fit in with the majority of earth's youth, seeking thrills and connection, bringing her phone with her to make herself known and dream. Rafael Evalesque (?) is right behind her on the want for recognition and wanting to be needed, though he can go with some peace too.

Jack Darby had been indecisive as a child, prayed any kind of small adventure past his home, but now he can readily claim he falls right in the latter category.

He didn't want the drama that seized his life--their guests from space bringing an intergalactic war with them wasn't as appealing to him as it was for Miko. Sure, the company of the Autobots is something Jack Darby can admit he wants to keep - their friendship a light to his old days he would rather not miss.

Jack Darby is also tired of fighting in wars. Wars, plural. It's no surprise he can remain as calm as he does in critical situations, considering his background. That he took leadership when he and the younger teens are left on their own goes beyond instinct. It's practiced, muscle-memory and experience calling him to stand. Neither is the fact that he can claim responsibility for his faults and honor alongside their achievements unusual. He's well beyond his peers in terms of maturity.

Jack Darby has a mother who works as a nurse, always working a late shift most nights and early mornings - so he doesn't see her much nowadays, even when he was younger.

His dad walked out on them, he lost him when he was much too young to remember his voice.

During those years they hadn't yet lived in Jasper, but New Jersey till he was 14 years old.

He got a few things he still keeps with him from his old home: a bead necklace with sword keychain. He never took it off, and he added beads on the anniversary of his childhood friend's death.

He'd lived while he died.

He lives with his memory following him.

Well, that, and a tattoo he had to beg his mom to allow him to get. He got it the last week before they moved to Jasper, on his lower hip. He's proud of both mementos, even if it sometimes makes him feel as though he's carrying a tombstone around with him.

Considering how many friends died as he grew up, how many funerals he's witnessed, it must be. But hey, this way they might see the world with him if he drags their spirits along a little.

He hesitated one time too many when he was younger.

He learned as he grew older.

He doesn't want the weight to increase. He won't let it.

He's tired of losing and regretting.

Just a small silly thing I noticed while watching Project Hail Mary, I think they would like each other. And someone drew Brainstorm interacting with Grace and Rocky so why wouldn’t they be friends with other members of Lost Light Crew? :)

Let’s play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.

retrieval team for objects in the backseat

custodian of the parking garage tickets

"All clear my way"

en-route dining concierge

I retook this quiz from a while ago

(Thought about it and would like to make it a tag game (no pressure))

@vic-fandom @lintrense *GRABS YOU BY THE SHOULDERS*

The Sparkling Saga: The beginning of the Fuckery

Part 1 / Part 2